King Billy

Heinz have actually started producing Christmas dinner in a can recently. I would have taken a photo of one the three hundred I have stored in my bunker, but they’re right at the back behind ten pallets of cup a soups and five tons of assorted military rations, so this was the first image that came up when I googled it. I suspect Roops may be limiting what I can get on Google as she consumes practically their entire output herself. I doubt they would want to piss off their most frequent user. They might need her someday if they have a major technical problem that no one else on Earth can put right.

Apology accepted.

Blackfisting? 👊🏾

😂😂😂

Mine are usually in a bowl by the front door with everyone elses. It’s my trousers that I normally can’t find.

Very reassuring to hear that our fat methane filled blimp Boris was able to make it back to London from the Cock 26 fest on his private jet, in time for dinner at The Garrick with Charles Moore, the editor of the Telegraph. Saved the planet, whipped his MPs into voting for more sleaze, stuffed a few hundred quids worth of poncified grub past his three chins with his old boss, and no doubt battered Carries already battered cunt, till it looked more like a tramps foot, which it probably smells worse than, when he staggered back to Downing St. We’re so lucky to have such a great leader.

Is there any one thing that you’ve got which you wish you hadn’t?

😂😂😂

Is that a massive rocket in your pants, or just your enormous dick trying to burst out?

No. Probably because I’ve got a fucking life.

Where did all this stem from?

😂😂😂

Isn’t that what your doctor said when you showed him the lettuce growing out of your arse?

Reported

A dam good idea.

Why, has someone unintentionally mentioned yours? 😂 Fuck off.

Just like Ireland, not very long ago.

You’ve spelled crayoned wrong.

Enjoy, if you can work out how to open the can.

‘How dare you!’

It was raining this afternoon for a while where I live. As far as I know this has never happened before. I hope the world doesn’t end before Christmas as I’ve ordered a lot of Christmas trees and I was hoping to do quite well this year. John Kerry is an absolute cunt.

“We know they are lying They know they are lying They know that we know they are lying Yet they continue to lie.” Aleksander Solzhenitsyn.

Which one will you be eating on Christmas Day?

Harsh.