King Billy

He thought he was an ice cream.

Madison, his faithful Old English Sheepdog would have raised the alarm and the paramedics would have had him cleaned up with the shower head, and off to footy training before the first coat was anywhere near dry.

Speed kills.

Hi ProfB. I’m glad you’re able to join us again. I was starting to fear the worst during your absence. KB 😘

Do you prefer your onions pickled, or when you wake up in the morning not pickled?

He’d definitely have put a bit more effort in and topped himself at the first attempt if he’d signed for Everton instead.

But nowhere near as long as your cock.

White Widow is racist, just like those Lioness lezzer birds who try to play football, according to the BBC. Not diverse enough. I couldn’t help noticing though that almost all the African, Caribbean and South and Central American competitors at the World Athletics Championships are entirely black. Something which the BBC have completely failed to notice yet. It seems that the fakestream media diversity spotters are far too busy with the rampant racism in British sport that they’ve failed to notice any of this. I guess they’ll get round to addressing it once the England womens team become 100% black and Gary Lineker recovers from the trauma of his decades of racist abuse which he bravely revealed and everyone can take the knee, apologise for their white privelege and spend the rest of their miserable lives with their guilty, bigoted, Anglo Saxon heads hung in shame.

I hope my explanation cleared up your query regarding my travel arrangements to Turkey to finish my dental treatment. I thoroughly recommend that you should visit Budapest some day, not necessarily for medical reasons like me, but as a tourist destination I’d rate it as the best Pacific coast resort in Turkey bar none. It’s right up there with Jaywick and Atlantic City. I was going to advise you to go ‘all inclusive’ but I’m pretty sure you know your way around a free bar without any help from me. No need to thank me CBB. Tesekkur Ederim.

I believe the establishment in question was in Sheffield and the two ladies you refer to are mother and daughter lol. Rumour has it that a Bentley with the number plate W4YNE was observed in the car park for a couple of hours after the match, every time Man U played Sheffield Wednesday or Sheffield Utd in a cup tie.

It’s probably just your totally devastated rectum imploding. Those early SLs have very strong engines and can take years of abuse, unlike your arsehole which has finally given up the ghost.

Fucking sad cunt. So scary 🤣

I might be in it, depending on which part of Budapest (the capital of Turkey) it was filmed in.

No DC. He’s asked me a very difficult question, which I’ve been unable to seriously answer, hence the silly reply which I thought would have shown up the glaring error in the question. How was I able to fly to Turkey unvaccinated for dental treatment? (which I’ve had done in Hungary). I think he’d have had me but for that one little error.

Of course. The canoe, the barrel and the teeth were all part of the package. The cigar was extra though.

Wouldn’t have them in the place, breaking the massage tables, leaving empty crisp packets and 2 litre Pepsi bottles everywhere. And more importantly, very few blokes are going to come to a brothel to fuck a big fat ugly cunt with a smelly arse that reeks of Greggs steak bakes. They can just go home for that, make love to the wife and save a bit of dosh towards a Valentines Day card and a cake or something for the greedy big munter they married and are too scared to leave.

The question everyone’s been asking, well maybe not everyone.

What about the SS? Are we supposed to refer to the female members as the SSes now? Oh that’s right no one knows what a female is nowadays. I can’t wait to see how Lineker etc are going to square it one day soon, when a couple of 6’8” geezers, sorry Lionesses come running out of the Wembley tunnel, enormous cocks dangling from their shorts and start sneakily feeling a few cunts in the ‘group hug’ before the kick off.

Unlikely. I take it you haven’t seen ‘Britains fattest families’?

Or Decs attending the ‘pre demolition’ auction at the old BSA factory on council business, bidding for a pallet load of unused but slightly rusty paper clips and fountain pen knibs.

🇬🇧Fenian🇬🇧

Wild celebrations and spontaneous partying broke out all over the corner as news of this extraordinary utterance spread. Except for a few wise men who seemed to know it wasn’t going to be her last word on this or anything else for that matter.

I took advantage of a loophole in the Turkish Covid travel regulations. By flying (Learjet) in to Istanbul (a small fishing village in the Alps near Tangiers) which had no vaccine requirements, unlike Memphis, Reykjavik, Budapest and Tel Aviv (the four main cities in Turkey), it was only a matter of a short 3 day trek through the Amazon rain forest, a couple of days in a canoe down the Mississippi, then up Niagara Falls in a wooden barrel, while smoking a huge (locally made) Havana cigar. If you have anything else you’d like to know about my trips to Hungary, don’t hesitate to ask when you sober up.

🤭

BLACK SOCKS MATTER