King Billy

‘Drag Queen Boring Hour’. Fuck off.

Two silly bald men wanking over a comb someone dropped on the pavement, but both sneakily hoping to spot a freshly laid dog turd before the other one swoops on it and runs off home with it while it’s still warm.

“AK47 Accept no substitute when you gotta kill every motherfucker in the room”

Zed’s dead Baby.

My Grandad concealed one in his back passage (with the charger and a spare battery) for two years in a Jap POW camp, and my Granny said it still worked perfectly for years after the war. Apparently he didn’t have a wristwatch when he was taken prisoner.

Bosch 24v cordless are the preferred tool of choice for the specialist kneecapping units in the Loyalist districts of Belfast. Apparently they’re far less likely to malfunction than a rusty 9mm automatic pistol (German engineering) and have the added bonus of sounding exactly like a Stuka dive bomber.

Please say you’ve never fingered him DC, even when he was pretending to be a bird?

Gas boiler? I bet he wouldn’t even have any idea how to get his fridge up and running if it conked out full of White Lightning on a Saturday night. Probably doesn’t even have the right type of screwdriver that he’d need if he did know what to do either.

Batcum.

Commented the corners actual real life freak, probably while admiring in the mirror the enormous appendage poking out of his charity shop piss soaked bloomers.

Creepy grassing cunt. Fuck off.

Get back in your doorway you piss soaked, dog on a piece of string, career beggar vagrant gombeen. Know your place unless you want the B Specials back to jog your memory.

Fucking hell, nothing gets past you does it? If I said sorry would it be too late for us to be friends? You fucking stupid fucking cunt.

Fisher Price hard drives are renowned for overheating issues. Hopefully his McLaren buggy will catch light while his 25 stone foster mum has left him cable tied in it outside Bargain Booze next giro day.

Two and a half days laughing, and then a few hours telling myself it must be a joke of some sort, as no adult human being with a fully formed brain would knowingly put their name to such a weak, pathetic attempt at cunting their obvious superior. And then I noticed it was you and everything became clear. It’s time to fuck off now. Don’t make me tell you again.

If you’re asking me whether you should change your username to this, then I’d have to say yes. Mainly because you’ve earned the right in the very short time you’ve been making an absolute fucking spastic of yourself on here, after escaping from whatever secure mental institution or experimental mong laboratory which you should really have realised was the best place for someone with your obvious difficulty’s. Fuck off. 😘

Kick the Pope.

Death by bumming.

Bhuna Brookes.

I can’t stop remembering all those races he won at the Olympics without defeet.

Reported

How are the bars of soap and Premier Inn biro sales going at the car boot sale now? Just asking for your Auntie as she’s probably brown bread now.

‘Byromongia’ lol.