Dave Umbongo

Does one of them look like you're wearing a deep sea divers boot, you fucking spaz.

Extremely lower class if you can't even spell it. Clark's with no 'e', you fucking moron. 2/10, must try harder.

Because you can't reproduce from the arsehole. Good plan.

It's a pity Caroline Flack topped herself when she still had a good few years left in her minge. Now she's been dead over a year only Stavros Frankly is interested.

Eddie is a 'Shadow' of his former self following his excursion into blackmail (can I say a black man has been accused of blackmail??) If the press reports are to be believed.

To be honest my weapon of choice in a riot would be a house brick which, to be fair, most BlackBerry phones were the size of.

Sounds like Love Island, which, to be fair has resulted in a few suicides because the participants couldn't hack the reality of life.

Difficult one that, how do you change the self entitled, I am always right, offended at everything attitude of a generation of young fuckwits?

I think I've given you inspiration for the name though based on the velcro material, you could call it Fuzzy-Wuzzy Darts.

I think the fuzzy wuzzy bit of the velcro is on the board and the plastic hook bit is on the end of the darts so in order to get them to stick you would have to throw the darts at the head. If you're throwing darts at their head what is the point of changing from the 48g pointy ones?

To be fair though, his bowels haven't worked since immediately before the moment of impact.

It's illegal to have a car air freshener hanging from the rear view mirror in the state he was driving hence the reason for the initial traffic stop. I hope the next policeman who gets trigger happy is black and the dead crim is white - that should be interesting.

He was actually breaking the law with his Daffodil Daydream hanging from his rear view mirror, unfortunately the outstanding warrant for his arrest caused him to panic. I can't imagine the outstanding warrant was for him having previously been stopped for having a Feu Orange one, so fuck knows what he had done. Does anyone really care now that he's dead. Justice has been served, Yankee style.

How much are they, a Tena? Lol

A simple mistake to make don't you think? for example, how many times have you sat down to piss and forgot how easy it is to aim a stream of piss when you have a cock.

I've had the same from the 'Daunte - king of the getaway drivers' post

Is it my imagination or does the latest British Airways ad show a couple of Lesbo's in well, Lesbos probably.

Keith, I'm curious as to what birthday present you're hoping for on your next birthday.

That's nothing to do with £10million, it's because you're a white male heterosexual and the media gaslighting that you should be hated and despised for being white, male and heterosexual.

You'll be surprised how people act when nearly £10million is at stake.

The irony of wanting equality by being unequal. The authors of this pilot sound like a couple of petulant children that have just thrown their shitty nappy at the wall.

What a politicised wankfest that pile of shit was. And that fucking cunt Noel with his black bros and hoes speech at the end was the cherry on this turdfest. Typical fucking BlackBroadcastingCompany.

No. You'd rather fuck Russell, you poof.

She doesn't like Dick.

Have they got an award for best black comedy? Desmonds was fucking shit, by the way.