Dave Umbongo
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Everything posted by Dave Umbongo
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I haven't bothered yet but, could somebody tell me if it's worth my time reading this lengthy prose?
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There is no god.....because if there fucking was he would have come up with something a bit better than Monkeypox as a replacement for AIDS. Allah Akbar!
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I despise people that lie about qualifications but, as I have always attested, having a qualification does not mean you're qualified. What really fucks me off is people who lie about professional memberships as you're deemed competent by, generally a chartered institution. Carl Stokes is a cunt.
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Guess the colour of the new University Challenge host?
Dave Umbongo replied to Neil's topic in The Corner
Well I'm relieved we haven't got as far as 'guess the gender'. There's hope for us yet. -
Not if he's French. Sprinting in the opposite direction would be his greatest skill.
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Morning Ape. What's got you all in a spin? Did your mum not let you have the plastic toy out of the cereal box.
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Rather bizarrely, the QC on the manufacturing process for these dolls means that any defective ones are rejected and melted down. Now there's an idea.
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Barbie with a cock. What do you think of that Pen?
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No, but I can get Dr Michael Hfuhruhurr to pick me one out. Fuck off.
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I would prefer scrag of lamb sandwiches.
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Wot no spuds?
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HoHoHo. This fucking poor excuse for a female is getting her Tena in a twist with the appointment of the first Scottish Period Dignity Officer. I hear you ask why?, Well, the officers name is Jason Grant. Yes, it's a geezer. Thoughts please.
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If by us, you mean Australians, so fucking what. We would be alright in the UK because he wouldn't want anyone pissing on his golf course
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I bet he's called it 'Andbummey' so he can run around the park shouting for it to "Come here ......."
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The Potterton was in the rental so unless my tenants are discerning alcoholics you might be disappointed, notwithstanding the fact, as a decent landlord, I've now had it replaced with a Vaillant. TBH it sounded like to much trouble to find new tenants if the current ones succumbed to carbon monoxide poisoning for some unexplainable reason.
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where the fuck have you been?, struggling to chisel your way out of your dried up swamp with all this dry weather?
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Lose some weight, you fat fucking Davros. No offence Judge.
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Consider shaving excess body hair.
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I bet 20 quid he'll lose his good eye and not that lazy fucking one with the half closed lid which I affectionately call his 'council eye' after Decimus, RIP.
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Some Mother's Do 'Ave 'Em is more my sort of thing and, unfortunately your mother did.
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Well I'm happy with the chimpanzee moniker if you are @cunt, I guess that means @Wolfieis the shit.
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I think he's been trying to fuck that useless fucking slag of a mother, Hollie Dance, with his snowflake defence of the pointless action of keeping the dead kid 'alive' so that might be the motive for getting his macro-maggot excited. Archie was about as alive as Charles, in Brian and Charles. Fuck off.
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I think I received that, it took up a whole 2kb of memory in my inbox.
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Using his rhythm stick*. (* ©Ian Dury 1977)
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Wivvers, I see your fucking froggy compatriots have decided to terminate that Beluga Whale after loading it on a truck. Yeh, of course they fucking did, the truck was probably already arranged to go to some local restaurant where it will be filleted up for some froggy delicacy, you fucking horse & snail eating despicable cunts.
