Dave Umbongo

I bet this cunt doesn't carry out his own boiler repairs that any other cunt of a landlord would do, in fact, he looks the type that would get very nervous around a gas pipe.

LOL. Wankers.

Even more rattled.

Rattled.

You clearly haven't had your evening asphyxiwank with your shower hose. Creepy little dog-bothering cunt.

A boyfriend who knows how to give a good time with just a tube of polystyrene cement.....probably.

Re-set should either be hyphenated as shown or spelt as one continuous word, reset. No wonder you forgot your password, you thick (new) cunt.

I've got this feeling that you're going to be using the confessions of others as new wanking material simply because you don't possess the mental dexterity to form your own normal fantasies. You weird cunt.

21 grams, so a little prick.

I would like to hear Jonathan Ross call you that.

Lazy acting in Quincy ME, In my opinion.

Well, for the first time in about 8 years I am going to be watching MOTD tonight. I suggest everyone of you cunts do the same to try and get the viewing figures to 22 million+. That'll teach the BBC a fucking lesson - that jug-eared cunt they're using as a figurehead is a waste of £1.3million / year.

Look out, Dominic Santini has got Stringfellows back....,again. Pair of poofs.

You really are a thick cunt if you believe everything that is said on this website.

Rather topically, a packet of cheesy Walkers crisps that are long past their best before date.

Yes, I don't fucking know either, it's a fucking mystery as deep as a car crash in a Parisian tunnel.

Can't stop fiddling with little joysticks??

Fucking hell. What a statement from the blackest, pottiest kettle on here.

Don't be fucking stupid, I have standards. Being a purveyor of value brand beans is one thing, flying a toy helicopter like some paedo Peter Pan is a step too far.

Fucking good job. We can get some quality analysis on the days football now from some drafted in split-arse like Alex Scott or Clare Balding.

Too fucking right, even I'm eating Stockwell beans at 27pence a tin rather than Heinz at over a quid. And another fucking thing, the weight of a tin of Heinz is 415grams, Stockwell and other own brands are 420grams. Fucking rip off cunts. Standing in solidarity with that fucking 3/4-wit @Ape™️.

I must have missed the week that she predicted a woman with a massive cock.

Up your game FFS. You've been here about 2 days and you haven't posted anything for me to conclude that you're nothing more than a prepubescent teen who thinks he / she / it is a grown up if they swear.

"you will shortly be visited by a tall man wearing a dark cape and wielding a scythe", I only said to Mystic Meg the other day. That'll fucking learn her for all that bollox predicting the winner of the National Lottery, she never once predicted the winner would be a tall good looking man with a huge cock, which is why I never won a fucking thing.

Douse yourself in petrol and burn yourself to a crisp you hirsute cunt. I bet you would come out plain as a flavour if you did. Yawn.