Dave Umbongo
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Everything posted by Dave Umbongo
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I'm sending you a full length mirror in the post. When it arrives, look at it. You're welcome. Fuck off.
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Excellent. How are you with calculations involving nurses??
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I've just been sick now. Cunt.
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Do you think its electric, or gas?
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What perplexes me about welfare dependant scroungers is, they always seem to have cash for beer and tabs, and the odd tattoo. Bring back fucking luncheon vouchers and milk tokens or, and national service.
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Fucking get a fucking job then you fucking twats. Still had enough money to become an alcoholic though, didn't you cunt, and the fucking mug shot of the ugly fucking useless cunts together is a selfie on a mobile. I bet they're paying monthly for that too like other feckless wankers. Vote fucking Conservative to drive these cunts to extinction.
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You're not trying to tell us you shove whole tree branches up your twat, are you?
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It's more black than white from the BBC although there preference is that you watch TV in all colours of the fucking rainbow. Bunch of poof groomers.
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Its fucking burst my bubble of typical fitness instructors, if nothing else. Where are the pictures of the page 3 stunners, pole dancers and topless bar staff??
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Only with beans.
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She's most likely celebrating that now you've fitted heating she can resign you to your shed 12 months of the year? Is your shed apex or pent roof?
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It's all pay per view Ratty, or don't you have a Big Bastard Cunts TV licence.
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You mean, is the Shortbread going to fuck up the Bourbon (again)
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If my parents had called me Jonty i would feel a bit mental and want to harm others, to be totally honest. The shit naming of offspring must be some sort of family tradition though.
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Where else are thick scroungers going to get social skills now that Jeremy Kyle has finished?
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I honestly don't know why this cunt is being portrayed as a bit of a hero at the moment for helping to detain Usman the Raghead on London Bridge. I suppose it was a case of 'right time, right place' for this cunt seeing as he was on the same naughty persons seminar as Usman for murdering a 21 year old girl. If you ask me the police should have rattled off a couple more rounds in this cunt.
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How the fuck would you manage to go dogging in that you sick cunt?
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I would suggest a goose or a Turkey, purely because were getting close to the time of year when they're carrying a bit more weight and are therefore a tighter fit., or so I've heard.
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I would have suggested that perhaps there's some stats from Norfolk, Virginia muddled up in these but I can't see Gun Crime or Homocide.
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Steamed??? Is that in relation to the type of trains that were departing the station or did you give them some sort of perverse golden shower on a cold day?
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Perhaps she would seem less of a man if her name was Zoe Uterus or, my particular favourite surname, Zoe Flaps instead.
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"Its beginning to look a lot like Cristmas" and the Snowy's arrived already.
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Can I suggest that you find yourself an old body warmer, sellotape a few old mobile phones to the outside and a few bits of wire and then put on a fake beard. Now run up and down any street in central London shouting 'Allah Akbar'. Thank you and fuck off.
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Alright luv, calm down.
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Presumably you already had a tub of vaseline at home otherwise I can't see how you would have used all the sausages. Did you use your Nectar card?
