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Everything posted by Dave Umbongo
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The mysterious case of the wet footprint
Dave Umbongo replied to Last Cunt Standing's topic in The Corner
So you have no issues with the act of blackmailing, which is illegal but you seem to have an issue with something that is legal. I think you must have some peat wedged in your ears that's interfering with what little thought is generated in your skull. -
The mysterious case of the wet footprint
Dave Umbongo replied to Last Cunt Standing's topic in The Corner
Errata. If it's Australia then, wait 2 years. -
The mysterious case of the wet footprint
Dave Umbongo replied to Last Cunt Standing's topic in The Corner
I honestly don't know what's weirder here, the sick sense of humour in my earlier response or the expectation that the original enquiry would receive any form of sensible response on this website. -
The mysterious case of the wet footprint
Dave Umbongo replied to Last Cunt Standing's topic in The Corner
Wait a year until the girl turns 16 then use the recording to blackmail her into getting some of the same action yourself. Everyone's a winner. -
That's not Decs. It's got a normal amount of fingers and toes.
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Zimbabwean Zoonosis, or ZZ Top virus where face masks don't give you any protection because of the ridiculous amount of facial hair the carriers have, like Gypps.
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I did think of posting a photo of myself with my own pair of big bollocks proudly on display but I understand from the regulars here that Mrs Roops is the only one allowed to post pictures of their own genitalia. If ever you're curious to see what the entrance to hell looks like I suggest you Google 'big hairy ginger twat'
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Welcome to the site. In order to get AIDS from a meerkat are you suggesting that if you had one you would fuck it up the arse? If yes, you are going to get on well with another poster on here called Frank.
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You seem pissed off. Were you given monkey hand-me-downs when you were younger?
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I work with a Russian called Sergey and they're absolutely fucking useless at their job. This piece of information should help you decide where to go when your insurance renewal is due.
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I hear Punkapes stuffed a few sooty chaps too.
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The incident in Wales is some bloke like Spotto who has had his cock bitten off by a rather hirsute sheep when he mistook the wrong end.
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What if they found Nazi gold in the basement? Asking for a friend.
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What a way to describe Mrs C. I'm beginning to think you're not a very pleasant chap Eric.
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Meaningless words that form irrelevant sayings
Dave Umbongo replied to Dave Umbongo's topic in The Corner
Just one fucking word, Roundabouts. Fuck off. -
Meaningless words that form irrelevant sayings
Dave Umbongo replied to Dave Umbongo's topic in The Corner
Your post comes across as if lockdown has really made you short tempered. Fear not though Dickless, June 21st will mean you can go back to your favourite gay bar outside Norwich Train Station. -
What is it with people that use these sayings like, 'I love you to the moon and back'. What the fuck does it even mean? and why not make it about other planets in the system? Also, 'Blue-sky thinking'?? Fuck off. The one that should be used is, 'I love you to Uranus and back'
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Well if you think Life in Devon is actually a cunt then I strongly suggest you pay a visit and perhaps if you do find it unbearable you just kill yourself. Thanks & fuck off.
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You're a brainless fucking moron for allowing yourself to get shafted by the HMRC. Read the fucking rules and you can negotiate them, then you will be able to maximise your income like you do when you're claiming all your benefits / UC. A Fool and his (parents) money are easily parted.
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The joke would also work if you substituted the penguin for a chinese man.
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He's such a depressive piece of shit and corrupt fuck weasle that if ever I saw the cunt whilst travelling through London on his push bike I would make sure a bus parked on top of him.
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- fearmonger
- miserymerchant
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To be fair, using soap, deodorant and mouthwash is beyond your comprehension, you filthy French cunt.
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Presumably The smoke Free (premises and enforcement) Regulations 2006 still apply in prisons so these stupid cunts can only smoke weed outside. I bet no one has thought of that, have they? Although if most of the cunts are in there for sick stuff like fiddling with kids or grannies I doubt a slap on wrist for smoking indoors is going to deter them. Fuck it, let them get on with it and hopefully they'll cut it with drain cleaner and end up wiping a few out.
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and a comma after you're, you fat b'stard.
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Cunts who wear face masks in the middle of nowhere
Dave Umbongo replied to camberwell gypsy's topic in The Corner
Her mum had already bought some.