Wolfie

5 minutes ago, camberwell gypsy said:

Would you like to colonise a planet with the likes of the Beckhams and Bono? No; neither would I. 

Yes. They will be my slaves, with Bono appointed as chief toilet cleaner.

21 minutes ago, Gong Farmer said:

Who's the we? If space travel ever becomes the norm it will only ever become the norm for the wealthy elites. Space travel will only ever be for the chosen few that can either afford it or have a credible reason to be able to do it. A sad fact but true.

Perhaps at first, but this will most likely change. For example, to own a car in the 1950s was prestigious and only wealthy people could afford to travel this way. Not so now. Without wishing to sound cynical, an uncontrollable population and scarcity of resources will bring about famine, and then war. The wealthy will travel by spacecraft to colonise Earth-like planets (which we are discovering now with great aplomb), and others will eventually follow suit. 

11 hours ago, nobgobbler said:

There's no proof that it's impossible to travel faster than the speed of light. There is just no proof that it is. Yet. To be able to prove it we would first have to achieve it and unless we develop the technology to create a time machine which is unlikely, the only option is to go out into space and put the space time continuum wormhole leap theory into practice. And that isn't going to happen any time soon. Call me cynical but I don't believe any astrocunt got as far as the moon. Jules Verne was cunt. 

The Welsh, Nigerians and Panzerknacker aside, we are unquestionably an immensely intelligent species – one which has built apparatus enabling manned spaceships to travel to the Moon and back just some 60 years after the Wright Brothers’ wooden aeroplane flew all of 40-50ft mid-air. Providing we don't destroy one another first, try and imagine the possibilities in a mere 100 years. When our scarce resources run out, we will be forced to evolve space travel technology.

27 minutes ago, camberwell gypsy said:

I had a phaal when I was drunk once.  Broke wind and set my knickers alight. My stomach didn't recover for days. 

I hope you wiped from north to south.

16 hours ago, Monumental cunt said:

That's fucking rasist that is.....the gingers we're here first, the Celtic dirty sweaty bastards.  They got displaced by the romans then the vikings then the fucking "black cunt" Norman invaders according to Dan Snow and the fucking BBC.   Now if you said you hated fucking black cunts there would be an outcry !!!  But gingers is ok.

My local Jobcentre is advertising for employment advisors, if you're interested.

18 hours ago, Panzerknacker said:

Laffin...be happy for me you cunt 

Panzerknacker 

I am happy for you, Pansy baby. I envisage you trolling around the supermarket aisles, spending your disability benefits on lager and microwave meals for one, eyeing up the ladies with one of these:

It would be like climbing into bed with a plucked ostrich.

9 minutes ago, Eric Cuntman said:

Of course not. I rarely fancy a Chinese and usually opt for a chicken madras and pilau rice with a Bombay aloo and keema naan, and other types of proper English food, like korma.

Surely you tikka the piss.

31 minutes ago, Ape said:

Well fuck me sideways - I agree with Roops!

Likewise. But I prefer her when she's feeling feisty and authoritarian at wine o'clock.

38 minutes ago, nocti said:

The daft Irish cunts would probably give him viagra.

He could sue them for misconduct. It would definitely stand up in court.

1 minute ago, DingTheRioja said:

It would take some fucking sedation to let a fireman with an angle grinder near my cock!

I'm sure a couple of aspirin would suffice.

Wanker!

13 hours ago, Tata Steely Dan said:

Tried reading a book recently you thick lazy cunt? You will never fly with the eagles if you lie with the pigeons. 

Says the person who's undoubtedly got more DVDs than books.

13 minutes ago, nobgobbler said:

Yeah, but if you were a woman, who would you rather look at?

It's virtually impossible to see things from a female viewpoint, especially as such irrelevances distract from the serious scientific nature of the programme. That said, at a push, I'd rather see an old man with a monocle who's likely wearing an incontinence nappy than some overgrown student depicting a huge Uranus.  

14 minutes ago, nobgobbler said:

I could listen to Brian Cox all day, he makes my favourite subject easy to understand. I think he has an honest approach, Patrick Moore didn't know either! He was a pompous twat, and you can't bring him back coz he's brown bread.

I'm with Gong on this one. Brian Cox gets on my fucking tits, with his gay, lisping fucking whiny voice and charity shop demeanour. He's been living off this cool 'Alex James from Blur' image for far too long, which BBC producers saw and exploited from the outset. He's about as rock 'n' roll as my arsehole after a hot curry. He also does this stupid fake smile for the camera, which brings him very near the top of my most punchable faces ever list. And this is a shame, because the cosmos interests me greatly – which was brought about in the first instance by the unique icon that is Sir Patrick Moore.

On 3/15/2017 at 10:28 PM, Rick_B said:

That's a bit unfair on the likes of Victoria Beckham.

Victoria is misunderstood. She's actually giving a talk at Trinity College, University of Cambridge, on how to hide your intelligence while portraying yourself as a common, thick and talentless bint from Harlow in Essex who gets lucky by being in the right place at the right time.

1 hour ago, Monumental cunt said:

What!!!.....a fucking black lord called Simon de montford  wouldn't have caused a stir in 1066.... you fucking idiot!    This programme is lavishly costumed and set in period at vast expense to us licence fee payers.   It matters now....and he would have been burnt at the fucking stake then.......you are obviously the product of a fucking limp wristed shite useless moronic education that sets facts aside in favour of questions like....show empathy for "Harold and his poorly eye".  Without any understanding of the facts of who what were when and why...... you are the typical cunt fuck idiot who lives there lives in a fucked up wank stain world ........you will get what you deserve in the end.    Brexit, muzzer terror bombs and mass starvation and death.    Your generation doesn't have any bollocks to hold your shit together because you are fuck wit simpletons who think everyone's nice and equal and fair and sympathetic...........no they are not.   They are out there to fuck with your white heads and make you think it's perfectly normal to show such shit on main stream tv to a fucked up generation of fucking morons !!!!     

I (mostly) concur with your sentiments. What a shame, therefore, you articulate them much in the same way as an angry teenager.

13 hours ago, Gong Farmer said:

Punkape calls Deliverpoo.

He's got scat regard for any other delivery company.

8 minutes ago, Lady Penelope said:

Very harsh .. there is a poor soul battering himself to death in the cooler because of his fixation with the 18th hole.

The jokes literally write themselves sometimes.

1 hour ago, Eric Cuntman said:

When you look at the pic on the right, it's not hard to see why he was cast as both of the 'Gay Twins'

That's true, because in the photo on the left he looks really straight.

5 minutes ago, nocti said:

I was thinking Bad Manners for a moment there.

I suppose I was rather rude about Claire. Still, she'll need to lose about 5-stone to tribute Buster Bloodvessel.

1 minute ago, The Beast said:

Yeah errr..............The Barron Knights

Your record collection surely is as vast as your infinite list.

3 hours ago, Panzerknacker said:

How would fat cunts get their pizzas though 

Panzerknacker 

You're quite right. Deliveroo obviously has a monopoly on the entire UK pizza delivery market, and none are ever delivered to people by car. What a superlatively insightful viewpoint, Panzerknacker.

WOLFIE

15 minutes ago, The Beast said:

Fucking good question. Anything dance I don't bother with. Sterile shit for the masses. Whatever happened to the good old days of popular music..........long dead.

Your examples please.