ratcum

If UBER drivers can't write about mars or milky way, I don't want the illiterate fucks driving me around. I mean. if I say "take me to your leader", I don't want to be taken to see Welsh Rockers Feeder.

yeast snuffler

If I was going to try and contact Minty (sniff), I wouldn't bother with a medium; I'd go straight for a large. That's were cunts have been going wrong all this time Wizzo

Only time will tell old friend. I'm filling in for David Bowie until he comes back as a whisp of smoke.

You're the king prawn of dykes on here Killer

You do right Manky. When I see some starving twat on a TV appeal, I often go into the loft space

you filthy witch's tit monkey

I keep forgetting we've got some proper women on here Gobster. I may have to call you a puff in future but please regard it as a term of bereavement.

Imagine getting Radox and Rodox mixed up Killer. You settle into a nice warm bath and a load of 70s/80s porn actors, some with mullets, suddenly appear. As for trying to make a Barclays deposit, with only a bright green fragrant powder for stimulation, I shudder to think..........

I'm so mean I don't even lend money to myself Alfalfa. I don't know if that helps at all.

I've reinvented myself as a lesbian/artificial flavourings guru, what have you done to keep it real Frank?

When ever I see the word Oedipus I think of hippopotamus, so be inference...............your mum. You should report me immediately old friend. It would be a kindness.

you could sell your tampons as langoustines Stubbly, you cavorting sauce

fuck your banana crayfish knickers

I quite lick them. It's like eating 10 lobsters but at a fraction of the cost. You're a prawn pincher too Gongly.

or Morris Travellers driven by blind lesbians

you're my fave lezzer on here Authoritah. If you were any more fishy, you'd need a fuckin E.U. quota all of your own.

I'm with you on the morris dancers you skate flavoured delight you

No, it's just a basic milkshake question which you're already trying to avoid.

That's 'Pay Per Mew' as you well know

Quincly, are you a Nesquik or a Crusha man? The truth now.

fish monger's mate

You know you're becoming a catastrophic lezzer don't you Ding? Why, before you know it, you'll be fancying women! I'm already a cod slotter, so would be happy to give you a few pointers.

He's only 12, so probably not

I was grooming my cat earlier today and thought how much some of you would like to see me grooming him online. He's called Dirlewanger, but responds to "Otto" and "You fuckin spastic cat" just as well. Message me your requests.