ratcum

This is why being British is still the fuckin best. Public school sodomy, concentration camps, Jimmy Saville, the Merlin engine

I still get rat arsed occasionally, although it's not what it sounds like

excellent

Can I just say I've never likes Paul Skinback? He also strikes me as the sort who has wholly inappropriate thoughts about chickens

you could have just said he was Welsh

Can I just say I've never liked Rastus Coldsmoke and that he strikes me as the sort who would spend a lot of time in the plumbing aisle at his local DIY store. "U bend if you want to, this shit's not for turning"

Use the space bar more often, it'll up your creativity

When the Japs invaded China I bet a lot cunts over here must have thought: "Eh?"

I will challenge mediocrity wherever it protrudes its ineffectual head a bit

No but perhaps you say a few words for your fans on here

fuck off you old bat

Lot's of cunts logged on tonight old fiend

ten dorrah

In Paul's first letter to the Corinthians, he initially just said: "VALDEZ IS COMING!" But a friend advised him that as an apostle, he really should mention God, Jesus and other murky shit. After several drafts and redrafts, the original premise was lost.

I don't know he's all grown up now

I had Rat Junior moved to another desk as he was sitting next to a total thicko in his reception class. I didn't give a fuck about anyone's sensibilities at the time

it remains an aspiration Deco but some training (and planning!) will be needed first I do already have a high protein diet

Think of all the Valdez spinoffs we could have commissioned? Actually don't think about them because I know what you're like: "Valdez is coming but he's a bit slow due to being on a mobility scooter"

To market, to market To buy a fat pig Home again, home again The fucker drowned in Florida

Never could see the point in denying something that didn't happen. I didn't kill my wife

Deco's more likely to be wearing denier than speaking it Scotto. Panic over Judge Jewdy doesn't need to turn in his grave

What the fuck? I'm the only holocaust denier in the village!

respect

The design brief for your head showed excessive use of the space bar

I’ll take you to the fuckin cleaners [toe] Stub. 2 for 1 all week brah.