Cuntybaws

Whats this ocd you fuckign bellend i'm eductaed to degree level and I GOT THE ADVANCED DICKHEAD!!!!! Nah, you're right Scotty, I feel dirty just typing that one sentence. Never go full retard.

Protestants and Catholics living together in perfect harmony - it's possible I suppose, and let's hope so. However, I fear that come 2116 they might be raising the black flag of ISIS over the Post Office rather than the tricolour.

You make a good point about war, Decs. The Easter Rising was an act of treason in a time of war, and the perpetrators were dealt with accordingly. No apologies. Nonetheless it was an event of some significance, and it obviously means a lot to a nation with little else to commemorate other than Plastic Paddy's Day, so milk its anniversary like a Scouser and move on. As I type some cunt with a tin whistle is playing Danny Boy on O'Connell Street, so I hope it gets better later.

I'm thinking of resurrecting the old Cuntwad ID in order to show them what true stupidity looked like.

Well, they did blow up that prison officer the other week. That'll fucking teach us.

I can't imagine this is going to end well.

The bovine menial obviously had no idea who you were. She probably made the assumption that you like chlamydia in your tea, though.

I think you're going to need a glitter-encrusted gift box for this turd, CK.

Where's my fucking hoverboard?

Kierkegarrd wrote, "Boredom is the root of all evil", so effectively it's your duty to root out the tedious in order to prevent moral turpitude from claiming the rest of us.

I don't know where you work, Luke, but in my experience the average programmer struggles to deal with a concept as simple as a leap year. I certainly wouldn't trust the cunts to implement a workable heuristic algorithm to underpin the relatively weighted decisions involved in determining whether the autopilot should initiate a self-destruct sequence rather than attempt to land its plane with 300 Manchester United supporters on board in the playground of a 100-pupil primary school in Bradford. As I recall, pretty much every story in Asimov's own robotics collections dealt with the laws going wrong in some way.

Oh well, the first page stayed mostly on topic, which is rare enough in itself these days. There is one final card to play in the attempt to convince you that AI is a cunt, and that is to cite the diabolically piss-poor film of that name. It was bad enough that it starred a mincing Jude Law and the appallingly boss-eyed midget, Haley Joel Osment. Given the current Rat resurgence I am almost afraid to mention that it was directed by Steven Spielberg.

A good analogy, but I've always seen him as more of a Morlock - I present in evidence this family portrait from his round robin Xmas card of 2014.

Have you seen Soylent Green, Punkers? Why don't you lie back and relax, tee up the Pastoral Symphony, and I'll be round to deliver the coup de grace as it segues into “Åses død”, assuming I can find my shovel in time.

Get the fuck off my thread, you savage.

As Bubbles accurately pointed out earlier: Twitter is not what I'd describe as a nurturing learning environment. I was sad, though, when they pulled her. I reckon if they'd given her another day she might have managed to get Stephen Fry to top himself.

Spanish pish but - much like Ding himself - I just can't summon up the energy or the vitriol to make it worth having a pop at it. So, sort of a cunt. Meh.

A mealy mouthed reply.

I can't help but feel you're all underestimating the scale of the AI threat. The AlphaGo program, created by the Google DeepMind project, recently handed World Go champion Lee Sedol his arse in a basket. Even the team who created it don't know how. It's a fairly safe bet, though, that it could do your job in its sleep. Be afraid, people, be very afraid.

Oh don't get me wrong, I hate that sour-faced, Krankie-looking cunt and her Nationalist cronies way more than I hate the Queen. I just seem to have such an awful lot of hate to go around, so there's plenty left over for the Windsors.

I'm sorry, Dave. I'm afraid I can't do that.

She's got more German DNA than a homosexual Berlin bath-house, and she's married to a jug-eared Greek racist with impulse control issues and Tourette's. I'm quite fond of my country too, Manky, which is precisely why the sooner they're all dead the happier I'll be.

On Wednesday, Microsoft began trialling an AI called Tay on Twitter. It was supposed to be indistinguishable from a teenage girl, and was designed to learn from its online interactions. Less than a day later they had to switch if off after it turned into – and I quote the Daily Telegraph here rather then the Sunday Sport – “an evil Hitler-loving, incestual sex-promoting, 'Bush did 9/11'-proclaiming robot”. Tay's finer moments include asking her followers to 'fuck me, daddy" and opining that "Hitler would have done a better job than the monkey we have got now. Donald trump is the only hope we've got". And these are the same cunts who tell us it's safe to have driverless cars? Frankly I'd rather have Skynet in charge of the nuclear warheads than Vicky fucking Pollard.

Whatever they are, you can sure fit a lot of cunts into them.

Actually, I am just shitting you. The original CNET article about this restaurant is dated 1st April.