Cuntybaws

That would be our old chum judgetwi.. He last visited on September 8th, so not dead yet, but hasn't posted for a whlle despite Ratty's best attempts to winkle him out.

Albion Rovers 2-1 Hamilton Academical

Want to go double-or-quits on Airdrie?

The prosecution rests.

Mrs Baws likes Iceland (the country, not the shop full of fuckwits) and has dragged me there a few times over the years. Like so many other unique and wonderful places, it would be immeasurably better if it wasn't for the awful cunts who live there.

I actually feel a bit sorry for Björk, whose partner for over a decade was an American artist named Matthew Barney. If you ever for a moment thought that Frank's videos were shit then I strongly advise you never to view any of Barney's "Cremaster" cycle - not unless you want to spend seven hours screaming "What the fuck?" over and over and over again before gouging out your own eyes with an ice-cream scoop. PS I also strongly advise Luke not to do a Google Image search for "cremaster".

I'm still waiting for him to bring back a tin of tartan paint for the renovation job in Milngavie.

"too rural" sounds like it might be a euphemism for "too close to a primary school".

There are worse syndromes to have, I suppose.

Natch.

It was a real-world cunt, not some contrived bollocks, with genuine anguish woven into its very fibre. It spoke to me in ways that “Yacht” never could. Definitely one of my all time favourites, right up there with “Getting Toilet Duck on your knob”.

"painting railings" was a classic nomination of its time. Today it would be categorised as primitive art, a veritable cri du coeur.

That's definitely NOT a euphemism.

Good old Mothrat - you can't say he's not consistent.

Last seen leaving Apple's mob three years ago. I understand there's a vacancy at national level - perhaps he'll apply for that?

Things could have been so different if we'd finished the job properly in 1815. "Le Weekend" would now be the least of the Académie française's worries.

My mother forced me to eat Brussels sprouts as a kid. It's her fault I murder prostitutes. http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/health-37642587

You don't need a weatherman to know which way the wind blows.

They would probably also qualify for the Chemistry prize, because they were sure as fuck on something when they recorded "Stations Of The Crass".

She also said that you can check out any time you like but you can never leave. Now, what was her name again?

I doubt these cunts would fit in a Smart ForFour.

If it moves, fuck it. If it doesn't move, fuck it anyway, it might just be sleeping.

Was it the U bend between the rectum and the sigmoid, or did it get wedged as far up as the transverse colon?

Double Diamond works wonders.

I strongly recommend staying wasted. I have seen this sober and will never be able to unsee it now.