Cuntybaws

What's the difference between an Afghan primary school and an Al Qaeda training camp? Fuck knows, I just fly the drone.

You asked for it...

What do Iron Man and Katie Price have in common? They've both had a Downey Jr. inside them.

Punkape checks into a hotel and says to the man at the front desk, “I hope the porn is disabled”. The man at the desk replies, “It’s just regular porn, you sick fuck.”

A son says to his mother, “Mum, I have the biggest dick of all the kids in the Nativity play. Is that because I'm black?” His mother replies, “No. it’s because you’re 19”.

I saw a thalidomide porn film the other day. The leading man had an arm like a babies cock.

God hates dykes. And fags. And you.

I've never found it to make any real difference one way or the other. I have a Gif that demonstrates - in an educational and artistic way - how to give an inch, but never let it be said that I encouraged envelope pushing. The very last thing we want to do is leave a back door open for Rothers.

Ming's divorcing Frank? And here I thought she was dead.

It's just a flesh wound.

Fill your boots - with vomit! PS I don't think this breaches Rule 9 but if it does then I'm happy to take my 24-hours in the cooler with immediate effect, as Wiz appears to be off his meds again.

ProfB isn't going to like this! Or Drew, come to think of it.

My God!

Apparently not. On reflection Ratty was far more erudite, but my "This is some piece-of-shit cunt I've seen before" sense was definitely tingling.

Hiya Ratty, hiya pal!

I got my twelve gauge sawed off. I got my headlights turned off. I'm 'bout to bust some shots off. I'm 'bout to dust some cops off.

I see you're avoiding the question even though I made it as simple as I could. Here's some useful advice for you anyway so you don't make the same mistake twice - there are no chicks with dicks, only men with tits.

Is MikeD with him? A small medium at large?

Would you be more offended if Elton John wanted to fuck you, or if he didn't want to fuck you?

Do it, do it, do it.

I'm pretty sure it was just a typo. He almost certainly meant "sort cock".

Thinks he's Malcolm Tucker. I'd smash his teeth down his fucking throat with a pool cue and see how hard the cunt is then. Motherwell rules.

Some cunts have too much time on their hands, but at least we know where Jazz is posting now. http://uncyclopedia.wikia.com/wiki/Bodger_and_Badger