Arnold

You sound like an old school ma'am. Do you have a red pen as well?

I have an old clock on my mantlepiece, it's a Smiths of Enfield. It's a family heirloom and has only lost one minute since last Sunday, what do you think of that? I sit and watch it at times whilst my life passes by. You've got all that to look forward to, Raasclaat, old chap.

This is becoming more common with each passing year. It was 0 degrees Kelvin yesterday morning – cold enough to make me wear a hat - and I counted four of these daft-sod hard men wandering around like it’s August in Benidorm, two sporting t-shirts. Is it an inability to grow up? Does preadolescent peer pressure control the actions of these sad bastards at this age of their bizarre lives? Perhaps if it froze their knackers off it might prevent them adding anymore to the gene pool. One lives in hope.

No, but I know of a few with who I can put you in touch if that's your particular bent.

Happily, I don't know Kyren Wilson. Is she a man?

Bored shitless.

I thought I would dip my toe to test the warmth and it's icy cold. You're all a bunch of bastards. Good evening.