Dyslexic cnut

2 minutes ago, Trucking Funt said:

It won't be relaxed immigration, it will be the UK creaming off the brightest India has to offer and it will be controlled. If they find it crowded here at least they can fuck off and live in Ireland when they get a British passport. It will be the same when we begin shifting 3 million Hong Kongers here from January 1st. We'll double your population in no time at all Paddy. You'll need to keep an eye on your cats and dogs though.

They’ll eat them themselves when the spud harvest fails and after they’ve eaten their kids again.

13 minutes ago, cuntspotter said:

I welcome Rajiv and Shashi to our fair and pleasant land... as long as they pay their taxes.... they can come and live next door to me. If they can put up with piss and shit.... well, my goats have to put up with it...why shouldn’t they. 

Those Guptahs on Gogglebox are ok. For Guptahs.

On 21/12/2020 at 18:04, ChildeHarold said:

Would you like to come into my bubble?

Odd nickname for your bum hole H?

3 minutes ago, PANZER MURPHY said:

You just keep telling yerself that whitey baby when the big shiney trade deal liz has with India results in a relaxed immigration system..as the Indian PM said..most Indians regard the UK as a second home ..so much for wavin the onion jack n farting land of hope n glory. 

PANZERMURPHYBABY 

Are you still holed up in your own Post Office?

1 minute ago, King Billy said:

Don’t know it but used to go raving in Banbridge. Circus Circus. Fucking madhouse in the early nineties. I’ll have an E please Bob. Sorry make that ten Bob.

Mate’s got it. He started a Guinness & oyster festival there years ago, apparently it’s a big gig now. He’s a full blown sash wearer who claims he can identify Catholics as their eyes are wider apart on their heads. He is a cunt.

1 hour ago, Stubby Pecker said:

No need to thank. I genuinely hope the pair of then, viagred to fuck, break into your gaff and spit roast you to death. Think on that muthafuka 

 

Royal Marines cunt

Didnt you get my CV after the job offer?

This does not help my chances of a good night’s sleep. I’m putting the chain on.

5 minutes ago, ChildeHarold said:

It seems to me when genuine talent pops up in Britain you exile it to the Continent because of your Victorian hypocritical value system and repressed personalities. It's not a question of homosexuality it's about enjoying life. Something the British are outstandingly bad at. 

Finger’s crossed that your ‘enjoyment’ lasts minutes.

7 hours ago, Hammer of Cunts said:

...has decided that he is to be called "she". No further comment.

It was quite funny when it burst onto the scene. It now needs executing. Twice.

1 hour ago, Stubby Pecker said:

Izzard or Grayson Perry- if you had to arse fuck one to save your life, which would you choose Doc?

Posted an hour ago and I’m already dreading going to sleep tonight. Many thanks for the fuckin nightmares Stubs.

2 minutes ago, Williewhoopassjohnson said:

I'd smash that in half, my blue veined custard chucker would be poking out her back after ten stellas and I'm not even sorry in the slightest. 

She doesn’t look like that now. She was in that jungle/castle/celeb thing. The skank is half dead and minging.

1 hour ago, Stubby Pecker said:

Thats actually half funny, but I doubt he has to pay for it

Fuck off though.

Didn’t he pay that spotty teenage office gopher who’s sphincter he was ‘inconveniencing’ off? He was about to be outed before he very bravely announced his chutney fiddling ways and his career, bizarrely, took off. I’d see him killed, daily.

Do you know The Plough in Hillsborough, Bill. Spent many-a-night face down there.

2 minutes ago, Dyslexic cnut said:

Noted. I’m a ‘Hai Karate’ man meself, the bitch isn’t buying it though.

 

1:44...Frank rocks up.

Just now, Eric Cuntman said:

It depends how much aftershave you drink I suppose. To be honest, I wouldn't recommend modern aftershave. I have a strong suspicion that 'Calvin Klein', 'Hugo Boss' and the like, have been drip-feeding the millennials with 'GAYNESS' drugs that have turned them into worthless mincing faggots.

Try obtaining some 'Brut '33'. It will make you feel like you've just had your kidneys ruptured by Henry Cooper. 

Or just drink some 'Blue Stratos'... it makes you dribble and talk about penguins.

Noted. I’m a ‘Hai Karate’ man meself, the bitch isn’t buying it though.

Just now, Eric Cuntman said:

I probably still would now if I'm honest DC. I know there are a lot of cunts on here who like to pretend that they wouldn't fuck anything less than a glamour model... but let's be honest. Most straight men would pretty much fuck anything that let them.

I know that when I'm on my deathbed, I won't be thinking... 

'You know what, I wish that I'd had less sex...'

You have no idea how many times I’ve used this phrase. No man ever died saying this. The testosterone drip-off has got the better of me yet Mrs Cnut, despite being younger and gagging seems unperturbed by this chemical development. I am, however, bearing an uncanny resemblance to @Neil’s avatar these days. Will better aftershave help?

17 minutes ago, Eric Cuntman said:

Helen Worth is a tortoise.

Back in the day? You would though.

22 hours ago, Lord Cuntingham said:

I pissed myself ,when the great, fat cunt came on the propaganda box to announce her departure from the mind numbing,mongrels sphincter wank band.Her ,cross between Rylan and Action man boyfriend stood beside the fat twat , trying to look both menacing and sympathetic and failing to do ether, if he's shagging that squid, he needs serious self harm therapy. If I had brought that piece of washed up offal home, the old fella would have kicked me all over the park, with his best steelies, then, booked me into specsavers , the very next day

If Sam Smith minced up Mt.Everest in twenty inch platform boots then stood on top of the world’s biggest step-ladder he still wouldn’t be high up enough on my list of stabable cunts to be above this piece of human scum. And I do not like Sam Smith.

Just now, Roadkill said:

 

If we get nothing else out of this other than @Mrs Roops complete and utter confusion its absolutely worth it.

Stop apologising on the main boards, DC. Sound like a puff. Fuck off.

I’m dyslexic, I meant ‘apopleptic’

22 minutes ago, Eric Cuntman said:

I'll give you that one. I can accept that you misunderstood the context. 

I advised you to drop JSP a few days ago. If you'd listened, you would have avoided this omnishambles.

Noted. Apopleptic.

18 minutes ago, King Billy said:

Metric or AF?

I need a lump hammer now please.

1 minute ago, Eric Cuntman said:

In the PM thread you just commented on.

I didn’t. I interpreted a reply differently with no malice intended and you know it. Look again.

8 minutes ago, King Billy said:

Absolutely and I thank you and a couple of others for good advice back then. I’m not part of this current skirmish but I’m of the opinion that going to war with long established members  might be a strategy which warrants another look. Imo there might still be time to change tack and rebuild a few burning bridges. It worked for me when I thought I could just take the whole corner on and soon realised I couldn’t. 

Noted. Can I borrow a spanner Bill?

1 minute ago, Eric Cuntman said:

Are you actually suggesting that you will remember @Roadkill's kindness and treat him favourably when you inevitably become the corner's 'Top Dog'?

Unbelievable.

RK. Drop this wanker. You're chaining yourself to a drowning spastic.

I’m joking Eric. Do grow up son.

4 minutes ago, Eric Cuntman said:

@Decimus

@Ape™️

@Cuntybaws

@King Billy

@Roadkill

@Stubby Pecker

@Major Cunt

@camberwell gypsy

@Cunty BigBollox

 

@Eric Cuntman

@Frank

@Witheredscrote

@Dawn Chorus (long service)

@Goober

SENIORS

Any other quality contributors have been omitted purely on the basis of infrequent appearances or are currently AWOL.

Now. I've answered your question DC. Apart from Roadkill trying in vain to get through to you out of pure sympathy and probably pity.. which other 'senior guys' do you have in your corner?

DEFINE what you consider to be a ‘senior?’ This is a list of members. You’re boring me now and a coward fights in a gang. Never been in the ring have you?

The point is ‘fuck off ganging up on Blighty’ you cunts. We’ve all been bladdered over there, me in Hillsborough, mid-troubles. But winter sun? Naah.