ChildeHarold Posted May 21 Report Share Posted May 21 Is that the one that has a small bird jumping out like a heat seeking missile, or the one with the little revolving mechanical figures? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ape™️ Posted May 21 Report Share Posted May 21 2 hours ago, Eric Cuntman said: That’s advanced engineering. It’s the advice of a spastic. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Decimus Posted May 21 Report Share Posted May 21 2 hours ago, Cunty BigBollox said: Take the pendulum off and put one of Pens massive balls in its place, that swinging thing will keep it going for ages. "Hickory Dickory Dock- Pen's got a massive cock". Lolololol. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Miles Posted May 21 Report Share Posted May 21 3 hours ago, ProfB said: Cuntspotter would advise, where has he gone, he's supposed to be admin I'm off to bed prof. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest entitled little cunt Posted May 21 Report Share Posted May 21 3 hours ago, and said: Spray it with WD40, then hit it with a fuckin' big hammer, usually works for me. I have an Omega seamaster that's losing time .Do you have any tips on how to get it back into fine fettle ? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest entitled little cunt Posted May 21 Report Share Posted May 21 1 hour ago, Eric Cuntman said: Remember ‘Eveready pp7 power-pack’? big square block with a bit of cardboard you peeled off to expose the terminals. We used to nick them out of yellow ‘Trafilamps’ and fuck about connecting them to car bulbs and Walkman motors. It wasn’t all air rifles and scavenged gunpowder. Parts of my childhood were all Swallows & Amazons-like. I used to put a PP9 on my tongue as form of self imposed torture. I think it might explain my poor spelling. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ChildeHarold Posted May 21 Report Share Posted May 21 8 minutes ago, Decimus said: "Hickory Dickory Dock- Pen's got a massive cock". Lolololol. How do you know? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ChildeHarold Posted May 21 Report Share Posted May 21 6 minutes ago, entitled little cunt said: I have an Omega seamaster that's losing time .Do you have any tips on how to get it back into fine fettle ? Find a popular calender, bathing and lingerie model with a well toned body and deal with the watch later. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cuntybaws Posted May 21 Report Share Posted May 21 1 minute ago, ChildeHarold said: Find a popular calender, bathing and lingerie model with a well toned body and deal with the watch later. I was going to suggest a service, but I meant the watch, not ELC. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cuntybaws Posted May 21 Report Share Posted May 21 17 minutes ago, entitled little cunt said: I have an Omega Seamaster that's losing time. Do you have any tips on how to get it back into fine fettle? Either apply less fisting butter before going elbow deep in your gay lover's arsehole or, better yet, just take the watch off first. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dave Umbongo Posted May 21 Report Share Posted May 21 17 minutes ago, entitled little cunt said: I used to put a PP9 on my tongue as form of self imposed torture. I think it might explain my poor spelling. I'm assuming you mean the old 9volt block battery that was actually designated a PP3. A PP9 is a model No. of an early neoprene dildo from the 1970's - putting one of them on your tongue would certainly explain a lot. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest entitled little cunt Posted May 21 Report Share Posted May 21 1 hour ago, Cuntybaws said: I was going to suggest a service, but I meant the watch, not ELC. I could do with a full service , a good old flush followed by a good filling of lubricant . Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest entitled little cunt Posted May 21 Report Share Posted May 21 1 hour ago, Cunty BigBollox said: I'm assuming you mean the old 9volt block battery that was actually designated a PP3. A PP9 is a model No. of an early neoprene dildo from the 1970's - putting one of them on your tongue would certainly explain a lot. Fuck me, that explains the smile on the face of the shop assistant in B&M bargains when I asked for a PP9. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest entitled little cunt Posted May 21 Report Share Posted May 21 1 hour ago, Cuntybaws said: Either apply less fisting butter before going elbow deep in your gay lover's arsehole or, better yet, just take the watch off first. Thanks , I'll try that.Fucking amazing what you can find out when you ask . Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest entitled little cunt Posted May 21 Report Share Posted May 21 2 hours ago, ChildeHarold said: Find a popular calender, bathing and lingerie model with a well toned body and deal with the watch later. Nowadays they all weigh 22 Stone now and originate from the Congo .I'd rather put on the silicone oven glove and have a good old fashioned wank . Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
and Posted May 22 Report Share Posted May 22 15 hours ago, Eddie said: The corner is absolute shit, fuck the lot of you. Literally or figuratively? 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
and Posted May 22 Report Share Posted May 22 14 hours ago, entitled little cunt said: I have an Omega seamaster that's losing time .Do you have any tips on how to get it back into fine fettle ? Fuck all that expensive shite, buy a fuckin' Casio. Spend the money you save on whores and drugs, it worked for OCR. 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ChildeHarold Posted May 22 Report Share Posted May 22 17 hours ago, entitled little cunt said: Nowadays they all weigh 22 Stone now and originate from the Congo .I'd rather put on the silicone oven glove and have a good old fashioned wank . Use a whole tub of Vics Vaporub on the glove. It'll help you breathe more easily at night. Mnd you your cock will be stuck to the ceiling. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Eric Cuntman Posted May 22 Report Share Posted May 22 19 hours ago, Ape™️ said: It’s the advice of a spastic. I was only joking. You and I both know that complex mechanical repairs cannot be performed using only a big hammer and a can of WD40. You need a bent screwdriver as well. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Eric Cuntman Posted May 22 Report Share Posted May 22 5 hours ago, and said: Fuck all that expensive shite, buy a fuckin' Casio. Spend the money you save on whores and drugs, it worked for OCR. SAS, Navy Seals, Gurkhas. Look at their wrists. All wearing Casio G-Shocks. Every single one of these cunts wearing a £25,000 watch is also carrying a mobile phone with a much more accurate chronometer built into it. If it weren’t for wankers like these, mugging wouldn’t have been invented. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cuntybaws Posted May 22 Report Share Posted May 22 19 minutes ago, Eric Cuntman said: SAS, Navy Seals, Gurkhas. Look at their wrists. All wearing Casio G-Shocks. G-Shocks are fucking great. See also Nite MX10. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Eric Cuntman Posted May 22 Report Share Posted May 22 5 minutes ago, Cuntybaws said: Nite MX10. I like that. Nice and simple. I can’t stand all that multi dial bullshit, nobody has ever needed or used any of it, and nobody ever will. They seem to have changed the name of Radium. Must’ve been all those clockmakers dying from licking the sable brushes they applied it with up until the early 20th century. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Roadkill Posted May 22 Report Share Posted May 22 4 minutes ago, Cuntybaws said: G=Shocks are fucking great. See also Nite MX10. Plain old Databank still wins the day for me. Comes in black plastic, silver or gold and has a calculator. Lasts about twenty years between batteries and simple push pin design on the straps for easy replacement. And no cunt in their right mind would ever stab you for it due to its blatant obsolescence, unless they're a Mackem or a Scouser. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ProfB Posted May 22 Author Report Share Posted May 22 Clock oil will be delled tonight by Ambo. My bessie, the gorge, cute & mega lovable Kazza is coming over with our fav beverage- girl's vod: Absolut Passionfruit Flavoured Vodka 18 notes waitrose, Sains the rasp at £22, K nearly ripped her gurdle off in horrible, because we need some change for a bag of mixed fruit & nuts. Seriously K has ordered us a noobie: Absolut Mandrin - I think we are going to melt. Mandrin.... Mandrin.... Mandrin.... Mandrin.... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ProfB Posted May 22 Author Report Share Posted May 22 Mandrin.... mrs Roots... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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