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The mysterious disappearance of Kate Middleton


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10 minutes ago, Old Chap Raasclaat said:

What have you been up to lately then, Harold? I was in Westminster yesterday, near Big Ben... Full of shifty pikey cunts by the bridge, walking up and down on the make. I headed towards Westminster Abbey and the Palestine protest was going on... Too busy, I went home. Didn't you say you live in Westminster? I ask because there was some chatterbox cunt in a Che Guevara beret, wandering around, in his own world typing away on his phone on a website that looked similar to this one. Was it you? 

I saw Kenneth near Notting Hill Gate years ago, I like him as an actor, very good in Layer Cake... However the cunt had a massive beer belly and looked fucked, about keel over. Is he dead?

No.  He's got that Fuck Off voice.   Westminster should be privatised as a hotel and leisure resort.   All the so called orifices of government should be relocated to a point logistically central to England which is around Leicester.   Of course none of that floats in Wrstminster.   They like it as it is.  They like the system as it is and they like the country as it is.  Leicester is too close to the real world for their taste.  After July 4th the deckchairs on the Titanic will be rearranged.  Here we go again!   

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On 31/05/2024 at 17:51, Frank said:

When one loses one’s hair, H, one’s charisma goes right out the window. When I eventually mustered up the courage to shave my craftily-combed bonce at 29, I bought a baseball cap thinking I could hide it from the wife. I walked through the door and she said ‘Fwang!, ohhhhhhhhhhhhh wot you did!?... taaake off!’ I slowly removed the cap, and do you know what she said?  She said… ‘Fwang is ping-pong baaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaalll’.

True story.

I lost my hair down to head-board friction, Frank. Explain your premature alopecia because we all know that there are no headboards in caravans.

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9 hours ago, Dyslexic cnut said:

Should a failed medical practitioner suddenly step into the newly available and lucrative health podcast slot, resplendent with a half-Aussie accent and bluebottle encrusted spouse…don’t think I won’t out your work on here to the media. Probably.

Can you imagine a worse existence than Celebrity TV doctor? Pandering to every middle class insecurity because the Daily Mail says so? Barking like a Jack Russell at every new health and wellness idea that the terminally disenchanted think will fix all their ills when the real solutions are too unpalatable? Smiling encouragingly on the This Morning sofa while some tortured Hyacinth from Tunbridge Wells drones on about menopausal flushing or cellulite. God above.

They wouldn’t want me on the telly. I’m the sort of bloke who had on his office wall pictures of Chinese mothers bent double in a paddy field with their infant on their back, just so I could point at it and tell the feckless oaf with a stubbed toe that he needed neither opiates, nor an MRI and a sick note, but a slap round the chops.

Tough love. No market for it. 

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6 hours ago, Last Cunt Standing said:

Can you imagine a worse existence than Celebrity TV doctor? Pandering to every middle class insecurity because the Daily Mail says so? Barking like a Jack Russell at every new health and wellness idea that the terminally disenchanted think will fix all their ills when the real solutions are too unpalatable? Smiling encouragingly on the This Morning sofa while some tortured Hyacinth from Tunbridge Wells drones on about menopausal flushing or cellulite. God above.

They wouldn’t want me on the telly. I’m the sort of bloke who had on his office wall pictures of Chinese mothers bent double in a paddy field with their infant on their back, just so I could point at it and tell the feckless oaf with a stubbed toe that he needed neither opiates, nor an MRI and a sick note, but a slap round the chops.

Tough love. No market for it. 

 

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On 09/06/2024 at 09:24, Cunty BigBollox said:

Dr Moseley was all too quick to live by his mantra of 'just do one thing' it would seem he was to preoccupied with just doing the one thing of putting one foot in front of the other to even consider a second, and probably more important thing when walking on a cliff top, what fucking direction he was going before he wandered off the edge.

He apparently said on the BBC recently that ‘a simple 20 minute walk every day could extend your life by up to 10 years’. Very clever man indeed.

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Just now, King Billy said:

He apparently said on the BBC recently that ‘a simple 20 minute walk every day could extend your life by up to 10 years’. Very clever man indeed.

Open Corner, Bill. This wanker has merely plagiarised folk with real talent…retrospectively. 

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23 hours ago, ChildeHarold said:

All the so called orifices of government should be relocated to a point logistically central to England which is around Leicester.   Of course none of that floats in Wrstminster.   They like it as it is.  They like the system as it is and they like the country as it is.  Leicester is too close to the real world for their taste. 

Brilliant H. And Keith Vas could be crowned King.

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On 08/06/2024 at 23:05, Last Cunt Standing said:

I don’t know who the fuck you are, and given that your post reeks of the sort of intellectual titan now sprouting like fungus all over this site, I have no wish to find out. Your reference to paddling pools and fondness for Thai crevices already has several beast alarms going off so it might be best to curtail that. It would do you well to learn how to punctuate, too. 

You won’t last long. That’s something. Now fuck off back under your rock. 

No one is remotely interested in if Kate Middleton's had her head cut off and put in a cryogenic freezing unit like Walt Disney or if she's been abducted by aliens from the Zeta Reticuli you cunt, you're boring and we're sick of the subject.

 

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On 09/06/2024 at 09:45, Dyslexic cnut said:

Kill it, Doc.

"Ooh Doc Doc!"

That's it get your tongue in there nice and deep and make sure to get all the peanuts and sweetcorn fuckwit 🌽💩👅

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7 hours ago, Dyslexic cnut said:

Open Corner, Bill. This wanker has merely plagiarised folk with real talent…retrospectively. 

Next time, don't be a stupid disleksick cunt and post straight to the open corner then, you fuckwit.

Slightly, everso rattled.

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2 hours ago, Cunty BigBollox said:

Next time, don't be a stupid disleksick cunt and post straight to the open corner then, you fuckwit.

Slightly, everso rattled.

S’up Pisspot? Hungover again or have you drunkenly shit the bed?

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9 hours ago, ClitWestwood said:

No one is remotely interested in if Kate Middleton's had her head cut off and put in a cryogenic freezing unit like Walt Disney or if she's been abducted by aliens from the Zeta Reticuli you cunt, you're boring and we're sick of the subject.

 

To be fair, I would be quite interested if they’d frozen her head in some secret facility. 

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11 hours ago, Prints Harry said:

It wouldn't work for you Billy would it .. not in that powered wheelchair.

You’ve left it a bit late to reinvent yourself as some sort of quick witted funny guy. 
About 100 years and half a million of the most unfunny and boring posts ever tbh.

The only things I’ve ever found remotely amusing that you've ever posted are….

1. Your ridiculous claim to be a biological female.

2. Your rapidly failing eyesight.

3. Your massive penis.

And 4. The funniest of all….your dead sisters obviously. 🤣

Fuck off.

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10 hours ago, Eric Cuntman said:

To be fair, I would be quite interested if they’d frozen her head in some secret facility. 

I’d make sure it was thoroughly defrosted before sticking my cock in it. 

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8 minutes ago, King Billy said:

You’ve left it a bit late to reinvent yourself as some sort of quick witted funny guy. 
About 100 years and half a million of the most unfunny and boring posts ever tbh.

The only things I’ve ever found remotely amusing that you've ever posted are….

1. Your ridiculous claim to be a biological female.

2. Your rapidly failing eyesight.

3. Your massive penis.

And 4. The funniest of all….your dead sisters obviously. 🤣

Fuck off.

Haven't you got homework to do? Them 12 times tables won't do themselves.

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