The Queen

[Last Cunt Standing]

56 minutes ago, King Billy said:

She sounds like she’d have been a right handful if she’d actually ever existed. That copy of ‘Fifty Shades of Grey’ you’ve got stashed on top of the cistern in the dunny is making you go all crazy Doc.

I’m outraged. Poor darling Victoria. She certainly had Secrets. Would’ve made your establishment a fortune, if she wasn’t independently wealthy. 

[Witheredscrote]

10 hours ago, Decimus said:

I miss the days when MOTD's 'Goal Of The Month' was still a thing that people got excited about. The Welsh wizard Jerry Goss was robbed more than once.

 

Please leave the videos to a professional.

@Frank your thoughts on this.

Edited September 15, 2022 by Witheredscrote
Fat Les indeed

[Frank]

1 hour ago, Witheredscrote said:

Please leave the videos to a professional.

@Frank your thoughts on this.

He never fails to disappoint these days, withers. When he’s not rambling on about imaginary cock, it’s football nostalgia. What an idiot. I’m on my way to Bury St Edmunds this morning. If anyone reading this lives in Sussex and fancies a punch-up, send me a pm. 

[Decimus]

2 hours ago, Frank said:

If anyone reading this lives in Sussex and fancies a punch-up, send me a pm. 

[Neil]

3 hours ago, Frank said:

He never fails to disappoint these days, withers. When he’s not rambling on about imaginary cock, it’s football nostalgia. What an idiot. I’m on my way to Bury St Edmunds this morning. If anyone reading this lives in Sussex and fancies a punch-up, send me a pm. 

Suffolk?

[Last Cunt Standing]

3 hours ago, Frank said:

He never fails to disappoint these days, withers. When he’s not rambling on about imaginary cock, it’s football nostalgia. What an idiot. I’m on my way to Bury St Edmunds this morning. If anyone reading this lives in Sussex and fancies a punch-up, send me a pm. 

I don’t live in Suffolk as you know Francis, but my best mate’s cousins’ brother-in-law does. He has seen your fabled 2015 bucket o’spaz dance video and reckons his incontinent old sheepdog could give you a good run for your money. In fact he’s so confident on an early knockout, he’ll bet you a pair of John Lobb Austerity Brogues in Blue Crocodile. 

I’ll PM you his address. 

[Frank]

2 hours ago, Neil said:

Suffolk?

What a disgusting stinking hole… the entire county full of toothless simpletons. Now I’ve no option but to go backwards to Ipswich for a connection to London. Can’t wait to get back home to Highgate and out on on the Heath for my daily portion of cock! Fuck you Neil. 

[Eric Cuntman]

30 minutes ago, Frank said:

What a disgusting stinking hole… the entire county full of toothless simpletons. Now I’ve no option but to go backwards to Ipswich for a connection to London. Can’t wait to get back home to Highgate and out on on the Heath for my daily portion of cock! Fuck you Neil. 

Fucking hell. One sniff of the leaderboard and you’re playing to the cheap seats with the gay shit. 

[Witheredscrote]

1 hour ago, Frank said:

What a disgusting stinking hole… the entire county full of toothless simpletons. Now I’ve no option but to go backwards to Ipswich for a connection to London. Can’t wait to get back home to Highgate and out on on the Heath for my daily portion of cock! Fuck you Neil. 

I doubt for one minute you will find him there. Neil is more your 'Behind the beach hut bum bandit' 

[Decimus]

2 hours ago, Frank said:

What a disgusting stinking hole… the entire county full of toothless simpletons. 

The first sensible thing you've said in months, soft-schlong.

 

[King Billy]

18 hours ago, Last Cunt Standing said:

I might consult my local brothel keeper on the intricacies of the Large Hadron Collider. 

Who better to consult on the intricacies of a Large Hardon Collider? 

[King Billy]

11 hours ago, Frank said:

If anyone reading this lives in Sussex and fancies a punch-up,

I’m sure you’ll get plenty of ‘fist action’ you greasy Hellenic wannabe, hopefully some of it aimed at what passes as your face, once your arsehole has been so hideously battered that even the most desperate bender on Earth wouldn’t have a go for free. 
You’re finished here Frank.

[King Billy]

‘We’re all in it together’, unless you’re an MP, a mate of an MP, a Westminster civil servant, or a mate of one of these lowlife wankers, a MSM ‘journalist’ or a mate of one of these even lower life tossers. I refer of course to the tens of thousands of daft cunts queuing to see the Lizard Queens box in Westminster Cathedral (currently 9 + hours). The three mile long line of sheep don’t appear to be in anything at all together with the above mentioned list of elitist hypocrites who have all day been walked straight to the front of the line (with 3 guests each), rather like the dribbling spastics that are ushered to the front of the queue, past the Kevs and Sharons who’ve waited for  hours with their seven multicoloured sprogs  to go on the rides at Alton Towers or the numerous other pleb parks around the country. And not even a photo in a plastic key ring or an ‘I went to see the Lizard Queens coffin and all I got was this lousy t-shirt’ to show their jealous neighbours when they get home to whatever fucking rat infested Northern housing estate they came from, and realise they’ve spent the next six months Universal Credit.

[Eric Cuntman]

4 minutes ago, King Billy said:

‘We’re all in it together’, unless you’re an MP, a mate of an MP, a Westminster civil servant, or a mate of one of these lowlife wankers, a MSM ‘journalist’ or a mate of one of these even lower life tossers. I refer of course to the tens of thousands of daft cunts queuing to see the Lizard Queens box in Westminster Cathedral (currently 9 + hours). The three mile long line of sheep don’t appear to be in anything at all together with the above mentioned list of elitist hypocrites who have all day been walked straight to the front of the line (with 3 guests each), rather like the dribbling spastics that are ushered to the front of the queue, past the Kevs and Sharons who’ve waited for  hours with their seven multicoloured sprogs  to go on the rides at Alton Towers or the numerous other pleb parks around the country. And not even a photo in a plastic key ring or an ‘I went to see the Lizard Queens coffin and all I got was this lousy t-shirt’ to show their jealous neighbours when they get home to whatever fucking rat infested Northern housing estate they came from, and realise they’ve spent the next six months Universal Credit.

Has the coffin got a heat lamp in it? They like that.

[King Billy]

29 minutes ago, Eric Cuntman said:

Has the coffin got a heat lamp in it? They like that.

Apparently Young Harry Hewitt has been given special permission to wear his military uniform to the funeral on Monday, instead of the morning suit thingy which he had to wear yesterday, due to having all his honorary military titles taken from him when he married Oprah or whatever her fucking name is and turned Turk on the Windsors. If the pussywhipped little ginger cuck had any clinkers at all he’d turn up in the Nazi outfit he got caught togged up in a few years ago in Vegas, with Meghan as a suntanned Private Helga.

[Eric Cuntman]

34 minutes ago, King Billy said:

Apparently Young Harry Hewitt has been given special permission to wear his military uniform to the funeral on Monday, instead of the morning suit thingy which he had to wear yesterday, due to having all his honorary military titles taken from him when he married Oprah or whatever her fucking name is and turned Turk on the Windsors. If the pussywhipped little ginger cuck had any clinkers at all he’d turn up in the Nazi outfit he got caught togged up in a few years ago in Vegas, with Meghan as a suntanned Private Helga.

Meghan hasn’t got the legs to be Helga. Kim Hartman wearing the lacy bra with swastikas on the nipples was a natural wank for any normal 11 year old white supremacist.

[White Cunt]

10 hours ago, King Billy said:

‘We’re all in it together’, unless you’re an MP, a mate of an MP, a Westminster civil servant, or a mate of one of these lowlife wankers, a MSM ‘journalist’ or a mate of one of these even lower life tossers. I refer of course to the tens of thousands of daft cunts queuing to see the Lizard Queens box in Westminster Cathedral (currently 9 + hours). The three mile long line of sheep don’t appear to be in anything at all together with the above mentioned list of elitist hypocrites who have all day been walked straight to the front of the line (with 3 guests each), rather like the dribbling spastics that are ushered to the front of the queue, past the Kevs and Sharons who’ve waited for  hours with their seven multicoloured sprogs  to go on the rides at Alton Towers or the numerous other pleb parks around the country. And not even a photo in a plastic key ring or an ‘I went to see the Lizard Queens coffin and all I got was this lousy t-shirt’ to show their jealous neighbours when they get home to whatever fucking rat infested Northern housing estate they came from, and realise they’ve spent the next six months Universal Credit.

I feel like I am hallucinating, B. Everywhere I go, there is her image in every pleb-stimulating media you can think of. I fully expect to get some text messages, ingest sky holograms and speciality bunting on the day in question.

Although I was considering wearing black on Monday, Mrs WC told me I would look like Mothman in the dark, besides the fact that it does poor service to an old fart's complexion.

[White Cunt]

9 hours ago, King Billy said:

Apparently Young Harry Hewitt has been given special permission to wear his military uniform to the funeral on Monday, instead of the morning suit thingy which he had to wear yesterday, due to having all his honorary military titles taken from him when he married Oprah or whatever her fucking name is and turned Turk on the Windsors. If the pussywhipped little ginger cuck had any clinkers at all he’d turn up in the Nazi outfit he got caught togged up in a few years ago in Vegas, with Meghan as a suntanned Private Helga.

https://www.abc.net.au/news/2015-07-18/buckingham-palace-slams-images-of-queens-nazi-salute/6630346

Why not?

[Dave Umbongo]

17 hours ago, King Billy said:

‘We’re all in it together’, unless you’re an MP, a mate of an MP, a Westminster civil servant, or a mate of one of these lowlife wankers, a MSM ‘journalist’ or a mate of one of these even lower life tossers. I refer of course to the tens of thousands of daft cunts queuing to see the Lizard Queens box in Westminster Cathedral (currently 9 + hours). The three mile long line of sheep don’t appear to be in anything at all together with the above mentioned list of elitist hypocrites who have all day been walked straight to the front of the line (with 3 guests each), rather like the dribbling spastics that are ushered to the front of the queue, past the Kevs and Sharons who’ve waited for  hours with their seven multicoloured sprogs  to go on the rides at Alton Towers or the numerous other pleb parks around the country. And not even a photo in a plastic key ring or an ‘I went to see the Lizard Queens coffin and all I got was this lousy t-shirt’ to show their jealous neighbours when they get home to whatever fucking rat infested Northern housing estate they came from, and realise they’ve spent the next six months Universal Credit.

18 hours now for the stupid cunts to queue and in the fucking rain for less than 10 seconds to bow your head at a wooden box, that we've been told she's inside. Thank fuck for Netflix and Amazon Prime.

[Last Cunt Standing]

23 hours ago, Eric Cuntman said:

Meghan hasn’t got the legs to be Helga. Kim Hartman wearing the lacy bra with swastikas on the nipples was a natural wank for any normal 11 year old white supremacist.

I’d have had you down as a Vicki Michelle man, myself Eric. 

‘Ello nighthawk..

[Eric Cuntman]

1 hour ago, Last Cunt Standing said:

I’d have had you down as a Vicki Michelle man, myself Eric. 

‘Ello nighthawk..

Helga was a bit more curvaceous. Remember the bug eyed, curly blonde midget who was the waitress in the later ones? 
Helga reminded me of Madeline Kahn in ‘Blazing Saddles’.

[Last Cunt Standing]

Latest updates from Queue watch on the News this morning. 14 hour wait. Beckham grieves dressed as a Peaky Blinder. Man arrested for rushing the flag-covered box, elbowing a tearful disabled girl out of the way. Holly and Phil bad for skipping the wait, Susanna Reid good for lining up like everyone else. Charlie heckled in Wales, and brings his own non-leaky pen to sign in. Andy indulges his uniform fetish in public for the first time. Wills shocked to find out he’s suddenly the owner of The Oval cricket ground and an overpriced biscuit manufacturer as Duke of Cornwall.

And line after line of simple blank-faced types are prepared to stand in bits of London all night for reasons they can’t articulate when Sky thrust a camera in to their face, mouthing a series of tired old platitudes about duty before trooping off to their tiny bungalow and their one bar electric fire. 

What a peculiar spectacle it is. Be in no doubt the rest of the world thinks it all a bit weird. 

[Roadkill]

13 minutes ago, Last Cunt Standing said:

Latest updates from Queue watch on the News this morning. 14 hour wait. Beckham grieves dressed as a Peaky Blinder. Man arrested for rushing the flag-covered box, elbowing a tearful disabled girl out of the way. Holly and Phil bad for skipping the wait, Susanna Reid good for lining up like everyone else. Charlie heckled in Wales, and brings his own non-leaky pen to sign in. Andy indulges his uniform fetish in public for the first time. Wills shocked to find out he’s suddenly the owner of The Oval cricket ground and an overpriced biscuit manufacturer as Duke of Cornwall.

And line after line of simple blank-faced types are prepared to stand in bits of London all night for reasons they can’t articulate when Sky thrust a camera in to their face, mouthing a series of tired old platitudes about duty before trooping off to their tiny bungalow and their one bar electric fire. 

What a peculiar spectacle it is. Be in no doubt the rest of the world thinks it all a bit weird. 

How long until Her Former Majesty becomes a public health risk? She must be getting ripe in there at this point.

One last freak hot spell and the cunts are going to get the unexpected honour of bringing souvenirs home.

[Jake The Muss]

18 minutes ago, Last Cunt Standing said:

Latest updates from Queue watch on the News this morning. 14 hour wait. Beckham grieves dressed as a Peaky Blinder. Man arrested for rushing the flag-covered box, elbowing a tearful disabled girl out of the way. Holly and Phil bad for skipping the wait, Susanna Reid good for lining up like everyone else. Charlie heckled in Wales, and brings his own non-leaky pen to sign in. Andy indulges his uniform fetish in public for the first time. Wills shocked to find out he’s suddenly the owner of The Oval cricket ground and an overpriced biscuit manufacturer as Duke of Cornwall.

And line after line of simple blank-faced types are prepared to stand in bits of London all night for reasons they can’t articulate when Sky thrust a camera in to their face, mouthing a series of tired old platitudes about duty before trooping off to their tiny bungalow and their one bar electric fire. 

What a peculiar spectacle it is. Be in no doubt the rest of the world thinks it all a bit weird. 

Stockholm syndrome comes to mind. Never understood why so many people get their knickers in a twist over a fraud family they don't know or have ever met. Fuck me it's bad enough knowing members of my own family. 

[King Billy]

8 hours ago, Last Cunt Standing said:

Latest updates from Queue watch

It’s a shame Concorde is no longer in service, as Ive worked out that I could have joined the queue when it was five hours, shuffled past Her Maj respectfully, hopped onto Concorde and been at JFK 2hrs 7mins and 1sec before I’d even joined the queue.