Gashtonbury

[Neil]

What a pile of wank it has become, fuck all to do with real music anymore. It has become a stale,boring rainbow shit fest. May as well call it a Radio 1 roadshow sponsored by the Saville hiding perverted bbc. Hope it fucking pisses down

[Old Chap Raasclaat]

46 minutes ago, Neil said:

What a pile of wank it has become, fuck all to do with real music anymore. It has become a stale,boring rainbow shit fest. May as well call it a Radio 1 roadshow sponsored by the Saville hiding perverted bbc. Hope it fucking pisses down

I agree and I'm glad to say I've never been... It's more of a pop festival nowadays, full of one hit wonder headliners and Glamping 'Celebrities' stood backstage trying to look like they're enjoying it. Fuck that. 

After hearing about your past exploits Neil, and the fact I've been here a while and haven't much conversation with you I thought I'd tell you something. 

I was walking down Portobello road earlier and a woman sits down outside a shop, clearly mad, she started shouting about her studies and past qualifications. Whilst she was wriggling around on the dirty floor (and carrying on said ramblings) she starts to lie down as I pass... she raised one of her legs, and her summer dress type thing rode up... I couldn't help but notice her white knickers, and in that brief moment I'm sure a sweaty looking flap was hanging out and there for all to see. Unlike some on here I carried on and made my way home, what would you have done?

 

[Frank]

5 minutes ago, Old Chap Raasclaat said:

I agree and I'm glad to say I've never been... It's more of a pop festival nowadays, full of one hit wonder headliners and Glamping 'Celebrities' stood backstage trying to look like they're enjoying it. Fuck that. 

After hearing about your past exploits Neil, and the fact I've been here a while and haven't much conversation with you I thought I'd tell you something. 

I was walking down Portobello road earlier and a woman sits down outside a shop, clearly mad, she started shouting about her studies and past qualifications. Whilst she was wriggling around on the dirty floor (and carrying on said ramblings) she starts to lie down as I pass... she raised one of her legs, and her summer dress type thing rode up... I couldn't help but notice her white knickers, and in that brief moment I'm sure a sweaty looking flap was hanging out and there for all to see. Unlike some on here I carried on and made my way home, what would you have done?

 

Neil might appear to be a sloth, but I can assure you he won't be responding to the above banal trite. 

[Old Chap Raasclaat]

1 minute ago, Frank said:

Neil might appear to be a sloth, but I can assure you he won't be responding to the above banal trite. 

Never mind all that shite Frank. I'm off to Venice soon, can't work out whether to stay on Lido or in the city...3 days in total, what would you advise?

[Dyslexic cnut]

10 minutes ago, Old Chap Raasclaat said:

Never mind all that shite Frank. I'm off to Venice soon, can't work out whether to stay on Lido or in the city...3 days in total, what would you advise?

Cross the Rialto bridge, Raas…you’ll get wallet-raped the other side. Poste Vecie restaurant (Casanova’s old haunt) if you’re with a woman you’re trying to impress/disembowel. You can get an ‘exquisite’ or ‘sublime’ bottle of Amarone for just under £245. God’s speed my old friend.

[Guest Williewhoopassjohnson2]

1 hour ago, Neil said:

What a pile of wank it has become, fuck all to do with real music anymore. It has become a stale,boring rainbow shit fest. May as well call it a Radio 1 roadshow sponsored by the Saville hiding perverted bbc. Hope it fucking pisses down

Reading festivals been the same since daphne and celeste got piss bottled on stage when it was still a rock festival,whoever put them on the lineup was a genius 

[King Billy]

7 minutes ago, Dyslexic cnut said:

Cross the Rialto bridge, Raas…you’ll get wallet-raped the other side. Poste Vecie restaurant (Casanova’s old haunt) if you’re with a woman you’re trying to impress/disembowel. You can get an ‘exquisite’ or ‘sublime’ bottle of Amarone for under £245. God’s speed my old friend.

Would you advise just one Cornetto DC?

[camberwell gypsy]

4 hours ago, Neil said:

What a pile of wank it has become, fuck all to do with real music anymore. It has become a stale,boring rainbow shit fest. May as well call it a Radio 1 roadshow sponsored by the Saville hiding perverted bbc. Hope it fucking pisses down

Sleaford Mods are on one of the stages but that's about it.

"Cheryl Cole is a victim but she don't know it yet. When in five years time when Ashley's playing for Bournemouth she'll be fucking Gary Barlow and smoking glue. Fucking Gary Barlow and smoking glue...."

[Dyslexic cnut]

2 hours ago, King Billy said:

Would you advise just one Cornetto DC?

I sailed through Venice on my last Irrawaddy river cruise…then I went for a little walk…

[Guest Parabolic Cunting]

4 hours ago, Frank said:

Neil might appear to be a sloth, but I can assure you he won't be responding to the above banal trite. 

Hi Frank, you vacuous cunt. I really would like to launch you into space with an angry black bear as your co-pilot.

[Dave Umbongo]

10 hours ago, King Billy said:

Would you advise just one Cornetto DC?

Yes, but, give it to me.

[Neil]

11 hours ago, Old Chap Raasclaat said:

I agree and I'm glad to say I've never been... It's more of a pop festival nowadays, full of one hit wonder headliners and Glamping 'Celebrities' stood backstage trying to look like they're enjoying it. Fuck that. 

After hearing about your past exploits Neil, and the fact I've been here a while and haven't much conversation with you I thought I'd tell you something. 

I was walking down Portobello road earlier and a woman sits down outside a shop, clearly mad, she started shouting about her studies and past qualifications. Whilst she was wriggling around on the dirty floor (and carrying on said ramblings) she starts to lie down as I pass... she raised one of her legs, and her summer dress type thing rode up... I couldn't help but notice her white knickers, and in that brief moment I'm sure a sweaty looking flap was hanging out and there for all to see. Unlike some on here I carried on and made my way home, what would you have done?

 

Sounds like you bumped in to Frank's new girlfriend.

[Hammer of Cunts]

12 hours ago, Williewhoopassjohnson2 said:

Reading festivals been the same since daphne and celeste got piss bottled on stage when it was still a rock festival,whoever put them on the lineup was a genius 

Reading was notorious for putting on a sacrificial band to get the crowd going. I remember Wayne County being on the recieving end of party-fours full of piss in about '75 or 76. I believe it's a bit snowflakey these days.

[Guest Williewhoopassjohnson2]

1 hour ago, Hammer of Cunts said:

Reading was notorious for putting on a sacrificial band to get the crowd going. I remember Wayne County being on the recieving end of party-fours full of piss in about '75 or 76. I believe it's a bit snowflakey these days.

I think all festivals have gone that way now bud,I'd say its because the crowd has changed so its all rich teenagers and middle class accountant types of bods,the days of rocking up with your mates in a clapped out motor full of beer and sleeping in a puddle for days at a time are sadly long gone .

[Wolfie]

15 hours ago, Old Chap Raasclaat said:

I agree and I'm glad to say I've never been... It's more of a pop festival nowadays, full of one hit wonder headliners and Glamping 'Celebrities' stood backstage trying to look like they're enjoying it. Fuck that.

 

 

1 hour ago, Williewhoopassjohnson2 said:

I think all festivals have gone that way now bud,I'd say its because the crowd has changed so its all rich teenagers and middle class accountant types of bods,the days of rocking up with your mates in a clapped out motor full of beer and sleeping in a puddle for days at a time are sadly long gone .

I've been just once (in 1999) and the difference to what it is now seems staggering. The mid-90s were probably the last of the fence-jumping years, where most were off their fucking faces on booze, drugs & rock 'n' roll. Not any more. The festival nowadays is rather more political, commercial and middle-class with the BBC and Guardian at the helm. I'm not entirely sure I'll ever return. In the spirit of classic British festivals, which ought to be a place where people forget about their woes and political differences, has long gone which was confirmed when the 'festival' opened with a live BBC video broadcast on all major stage screens from Ukrainian president Zelensky. What a pile of manipulated horseshit. Some much smaller, more intimate festivals have become what this huge commercial shitfest used to be. My only regret is that I was never presented the opportunity to take a crap in Billy Bragg's shoes.

[Hammer of Cunts]

24 minutes ago, Wolfie said:

 

I've been just once (in 1999) and the difference to what it is now seems staggering. The mid-90s were probably the last of the fence-jumping years, where most were off their fucking faces on booze, drugs & rock 'n' roll. Not any more. The festival nowadays is rather more political, commercial and middle-class with the BBC and Guardian at the helm. I'm not entirely sure I'll ever return. In the spirit of classic British festivals, which ought to be a place where people forget about their woes and political differences, has long gone which was confirmed when the 'festival' opened with a live BBC video broadcast on all major stage screens from Ukrainian president Zelensky. What a pile of manipulated horseshit. Some much smaller, more intimate festivals have become what this huge commercial shitfest used to be. My only regret is that I was never presented the opportunity to take a crap in Billy Bragg's shoes.

I haven't been since working there in the mid '80s. The "Peace Convoy" were trying to take over with variety of Mad Max vehicles and the markets were full of West Indians selling dodgy pills. Someone was stabbed. There were a load of trustafarian hippies building a stone circle for some reason.

I think the only acts I saw were Van Morrison and Richard Thompson, at least I hadn't paid to get in.

Sid Rawles was a cunt.

[Guest Williewhoopassjohnson2]

38 minutes ago, Wolfie said:

 

I've been just once (in 1999) and the difference to what it is now seems staggering. The mid-90s were probably the last of the fence-jumping years, where most were off their fucking faces on booze, drugs & rock 'n' roll. Not any more. The festival nowadays is rather more political, commercial and middle-class with the BBC and Guardian at the helm. I'm not entirely sure I'll ever return. In the spirit of classic British festivals, which ought to be a place where people forget about their woes and political differences, has long gone which was confirmed when the 'festival' opened with a live BBC video broadcast on all major stage screens from Ukrainian president Zelensky. What a pile of manipulated horseshit. Some much smaller, more intimate festivals have become what this huge commercial shitfest used to be. My only regret is that I was never presented the opportunity to take a crap in Billy Bragg's shoes.

Yeah thats tonally valid , I think music reflects where we are socially and everything and everyone now is just obsessed with political opinion and uses it as a selling point to push their own views,headliners ranting on about the tories at Glastonbury is hilarious because I can't think of a more middle class event they could do it at . I think musically you won't get generations of what we classed as rockstars again because social media killed off all the mystique about them and they also can't get away with having anything less than a clean cut image because they'll just get cancelled out for the next Ed sheeran . I'd say oasis were the last real rock n roll band,the libertines were really close but sunk themselves with the addiction problems.  

[Neil]

I would love to have seen Greta Cuntberg take a flying bottle of piss to the face, I'd have whacked her over the head and shit in her mouth given half a chance. 

[Dyslexic cnut]

1 hour ago, Wolfie said:

 

I've been just once (in 1999) and the difference to what it is now seems staggering. The mid-90s were probably the last of the fence-jumping years, where most were off their fucking faces on booze, drugs & rock 'n' roll. Not any more. The festival nowadays is rather more political, commercial and middle-class with the BBC and Guardian at the helm. I'm not entirely sure I'll ever return. In the spirit of classic British festivals, which ought to be a place where people forget about their woes and political differences, has long gone which was confirmed when the 'festival' opened with a live BBC video broadcast on all major stage screens from Ukrainian president Zelensky. What a pile of manipulated horseshit. Some much smaller, more intimate festivals have become what this huge commercial shitfest used to be. My only regret is that I was never presented the opportunity to take a crap in Billy Bragg's shoes.

It’s gone downhill since the last one I hosted in our back yard in the early 80’s if I’m being honest. All the bog roll disappeared and there was vegetarian scutter all over our outside lav seat. Dirty cunts they were.

[Eric Cuntman]

27 minutes ago, Neil said:

I would love to have seen Greta Cuntberg take a flying bottle of piss to the face, I'd have whacked her over the head and shit in her mouth given half a chance. 

Pervy Pete said something similar to RK once. 

In a far more sinister context.

[Frank]

23 hours ago, Neil said:

What a pile of wank it has become, fuck all to do with real music anymore. It has become a stale,boring rainbow shit fest. May as well call it a Radio 1 roadshow sponsored by the Saville hiding perverted bbc. Hope it fucking pisses down

There's some obese foul-mouthed black whore on the Glastonbury stage called 'Megan Thee Stallion', rapping about her pussy that goes something like... 'yo ma doo doo shit, like-a-my boo boo clit'. Honestly, Neil, I wish I was dead. 

[King Billy]

6 hours ago, Dyslexic cnut said:

It’s gone downhill since the last one I hosted in our back yard in the early 80’s if I’m being honest. All the bog roll disappeared and there was vegetarian scutter all over our outside lav seat. Dirty cunts they were.

How many were crushed to death attempting to get out?

[King Billy]

38 minutes ago, Frank said:

I wish I was dead. 

38 mins and not a single person has disagreed with you Frank. Read the room ffs.

[ProfB]

4 minutes ago, King Billy said:

38 mins and not a single person has disagreed with you Frank. Read the room ffs.

Hi there 👑 billy

I hope you are well?

Love ProfB xxx

[King Billy]

24 minutes ago, ProfB said:

Hi there 👑 billy

I hope you are well?

Love ProfB xxx

Evening ProfB. I am well but alas the world is not.