Guest Parabolic Cunting Posted May 6, 2022 Report Share Posted May 6, 2022 Watching keenly from the sidelines, I see 2 men square up outside the Fox. Rubbernecking, I hope to see a bloodbath and catch myself using 'oh goody' hands. The wives are screaming for the men to back down as each jabs an accusatory finger toward the other. Briefly the men appear to cool down, suddenly aware they are being watched by a highstreet full of people. They realise it's too late to back down. They have to fight to save face. I watch them look at one another regretfully before white shirt man throws a feeble punch toward flower shirt man. They then proceed to flap around like a couple of teenage queers in the sea. The fight is won by white shirt man about ten minutes later, due to exhaustion and without having scored a single direct hit. Learn to fight cunts. Do share stories of your fighting triumps. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cuntybaws Posted May 6, 2022 Report Share Posted May 6, 2022 Paging @Eddie to the main board! 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Roadkill Posted May 6, 2022 Report Share Posted May 6, 2022 14 minutes ago, Parabolic Cunting said: Do share stories of your fighting triumps. Never been in a fight. In reality @Witheredscrote could probably deck me with his oxygen tank. I'd draw a very unflattering picture of him afterwards though. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Eric Cuntman Posted May 6, 2022 Report Share Posted May 6, 2022 48 minutes ago, Parabolic Cunting said: They then proceed to flap around like a couple of teenage queers in the sea. Consider this a preemptive apology for plagiarising the above. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Goober Posted May 6, 2022 Report Share Posted May 6, 2022 27 minutes ago, Roadkill said: Never been in a fight. In reality @Witheredscrote could probably deck me with his oxygen tank. I'd draw a very unflattering picture of him afterwards though. Never been in a fight? What's life like for a homosexualist in Newcastle these days? Has the BBC campaign to make heterosexuality abnormal made life more tolerable for them these days? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Eric Cuntman Posted May 6, 2022 Report Share Posted May 6, 2022 34 minutes ago, Roadkill said: Never been in a fight. In reality @Witheredscrote could probably deck me with his oxygen tank. I'd draw a very unflattering picture of him afterwards though. Nobody could win a fight with Withers. He's absorbed more rads than Bruce Banner. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Eric Cuntman Posted May 6, 2022 Report Share Posted May 6, 2022 Just now, Goober said: Never been in a fight? What's life like for a homosexualist in Newcastle these days? Has the BBC campaign to make heterosexuality abnormal made life more tolerable for them these days? He's a different kind of Geordie. The only one who can read and write, reason and think. Like that arachnid in 'Starship Troopers' that can control all the other arachnids telepathically. RK is 'The Brain-Geordie'. 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Goober Posted May 6, 2022 Report Share Posted May 6, 2022 1 minute ago, Eric Cuntman said: He's a different kind of Geordie. The only one who can read and write, reason and think. Like that arachnid in 'Starship Troopers' that can control all the other arachnids telepathically. RK is 'The Brain-Geordie'. That's a scary thought. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
White Cunt Posted May 7, 2022 Report Share Posted May 7, 2022 6 minutes ago, Goober said: Never been in a fight? What's life like for a homosexualist in Newcastle these days? Has the BBC campaign to make heterosexuality abnormal made life more tolerable for them these days? I doubt there are any left, as all move to Bournemouth come late puberty. It’s a matter of survival. Since I don’t exactly recall the average life expectancy for a heterosexual male in this part of the country, guessing it being around forty, max, the south-migrating poof/mix/what’sit, can easily double its lifespan with this strategy. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Roadkill Posted May 7, 2022 Report Share Posted May 7, 2022 12 minutes ago, Goober said: Never been in a fight? What's life like for a homosexualist in Newcastle these days? Has the BBC campaign to make heterosexuality abnormal made life more tolerable for them these days? Surely the concept of personal, sweaty, breath smelling combat with another man is more homosexual than just shagging his missus and making a quick escape via the garage roof? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
camberwell gypsy Posted May 7, 2022 Report Share Posted May 7, 2022 1 hour ago, Parabolic Cunting said: Watching keenly from the sidelines, I see 2 men square up outside the Fox. Rubbernecking, I hope to see a bloodbath and catch myself using 'oh goody' hands. The wives are screaming for the men to back down as each jabs an accusatory finger toward the other. Briefly the men appear to cool down, suddenly aware they are being watched by a highstreet full of people. They realise it's too late to back down. They have to fight to save face. I watch them look at one another regretfully before white shirt man throws a feeble punch toward flower shirt man. They then proceed to flap around like a couple of teenage queers in the sea. The fight is won by white shirt man about ten minutes later, due to exhaustion and without having scored a single direct hit. Learn to fight cunts. Do share stories of your fighting triumps. I'm sure some cunt was recording on their I phone and will no doubt end up on yootube later. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Goober Posted May 7, 2022 Report Share Posted May 7, 2022 28 minutes ago, Roadkill said: Surely the concept of personal, sweaty, breath smelling combat with another man is more homosexual than just shagging his missus and making a quick escape via the garage roof? Well, I'm not a huge fan of the commercialised ritual of men pounding each other in the ring for 10 rounds, but very, very occasionally it's necessary to plant one on an idiot and fuck them up. The bleeding heart liberals might want us all to settle our differences through dialogue and mutual dick sucking, but nothing brings a twat into line quicker than a good hard, knuckles first punch to the larynx. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Roadkill Posted May 7, 2022 Report Share Posted May 7, 2022 3 minutes ago, Goober said: Well, I'm not a huge fan of the commercialised ritual of men pounding each other in the ring for 10 rounds, but very, very occasionally it's necessary to plant one on an idiot and fuck them up. The bleeding heart liberals might want us all to settle our differences through dialogue and mutual dick sucking, but nothing brings a twat into line quicker than a good hard, knuckles first punch to the larynx. Yes, but it never really goes down like that, does it? A quick punch to the neck and the opponent crumples to the ground as the victor basks in the glory of his adoring crowd. That's movie shit. What you really get is exactly what @Parabolic Cunting describes. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Goober Posted May 7, 2022 Report Share Posted May 7, 2022 14 minutes ago, Roadkill said: Yes, but it never really goes down like that, does it? A quick punch to the neck and the opponent crumples to the ground as the victor basks in the glory of his adoring crowd. That's movie shit. What you really get is exactly what @Parabolic Cunting describes. I've seen it, but it's not been my personal experience, RK. Then again, I'm not fucking stupid enough to start fisticuffs with anyone that could do me serious harm. My old man taught me to never turn my back on someone that's drunk and kicking off, and if it's unavoidable, get the first punch in and really make it count. People with their nose spread across their face can't see to hit back. It's invaluable advice. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Eddie Posted May 7, 2022 Report Share Posted May 7, 2022 4 hours ago, Cuntybaws said: Paging @Eddie to the main board! I’ve hung up my gloves baws, roops fights all my battles now, she is far more ferocious than I could ever be. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Witheredscrote Posted May 7, 2022 Report Share Posted May 7, 2022 5 hours ago, Eric Cuntman said: Nobody could win a fight with Withers. He's absorbed more rads than Bruce Banner. Hear! Hear!, my geese glow in the dark. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dave Umbongo Posted May 7, 2022 Report Share Posted May 7, 2022 8 hours ago, Roadkill said: Never been in a fight. In reality @Witheredscrote could probably deck me with his oxygen tank. I'd draw a very unflattering picture of him afterwards though. He's more likely to try and waterboard you with anything he has to hand, being French and in a fight that is likely to be a white flag and his own piss. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dave Umbongo Posted May 7, 2022 Report Share Posted May 7, 2022 1 hour ago, Witheredscrote said: Hear! Hear!, my geese glow in the dark. Like the kids in the old Ready-Brek ads because they've got your ejaculate up their arse,.....the geese, not the kids........,obviously. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Witheredscrote Posted May 7, 2022 Report Share Posted May 7, 2022 6 minutes ago, Cunty BigBollox said: Like the kids in the old Ready-Brek ads because they've got your ejaculate up their arse,.....the geese, not the kids........,obviously. Accusation of beastiality. Expect a lengthy ban. Reported. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Decimus Posted May 7, 2022 Report Share Posted May 7, 2022 45 minutes ago, Witheredscrote said: Accusation of beastiality. Expect a lengthy ban. Reported. On topic, If I ever see you in The Gate I'm going to knee you in your bioluminescent bollocks so hard your false teeth will fly out. Sacre Bleu indeed. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Witheredscrote Posted May 7, 2022 Report Share Posted May 7, 2022 39 minutes ago, Decimus said: On topic, If I ever see you in The Gate I'm going to knee you in your bioluminescent bollocks so hard your false teeth will fly out. Sacre Bleu indeed. Being half (the better half) French, ma Momie used to say 'Being French, you will have few friends, but at least you were not born in Norfolk' Lol lol 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cuntybaws Posted May 7, 2022 Report Share Posted May 7, 2022 13 hours ago, Roadkill said: Never been in a fight. I recall a festive poem from Viz many years ago which went something like this: It's Xmas time and as we see, The Bacon family watch TV. Then everyone begins to fight, Except for Gran, she's soft as shite. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Hammer of Cunts Posted May 7, 2022 Report Share Posted May 7, 2022 13 hours ago, Parabolic Cunting said: The wives are screaming for the men to back down Odds on they'll have started it in the first place. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dave Umbongo Posted May 7, 2022 Report Share Posted May 7, 2022 11 hours ago, Witheredscrote said: Accusation of beastiality. Expect a lengthy ban. Reported. No ban because it's fact, not an accusation. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Wolfie Posted May 7, 2022 Report Share Posted May 7, 2022 11 hours ago, Witheredscrote said: Accusation of beastiality. Expect a lengthy ban. Reported. It's 'bestiality', you French pea-brained grammatical lummox. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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