ProfB Posted August 11, 2021 Report Share Posted August 11, 2021 I have been 100% scammed by the cunting bastards called Waitrose: my packet of six sausages said LINCOLNSHIRE sausages, once home I saw made from Hampshire boars in tiny writing. The sausage are FUCKING FAKES, had I realised in the store, I would have screamed blue murder at the 4 eyed, wideload, cuntbreed that served me. SHE KNEW I thought they were fully fledged Lincs bangers. What next, Cumberland sausage made in Pompeii out of shark’s bollox? I DO NOT know how Waitrose could do this to me, they are EVIL, sick in the skull to pull off this heinous scam. Hampshire is famous for watercress not 🐽s PS the good news is I got a Free Daily Fail with my My Waitrose card, front page is about Prince Andrew’s sausage. 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
PANZER MURPHY Posted August 11, 2021 Report Share Posted August 11, 2021 Laffin PANZERMURPHYBABY 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Roadkill Posted August 11, 2021 Report Share Posted August 11, 2021 7 minutes ago, ProfB said: I have been 100% scammed by the cunting bastards called Waitrose: my packet of six sausages said LINCOLNSHIRE sausages, once home I saw made from Hampshire boars in tiny writing. The sausage are FUCKING FAKES, had I realised in the store, I would have screamed blue murder at the 4 eyed, wideload, cuntbreed that served me. SHE KNEW I thought they were fully fledged Lincs bangers. What next, Cumberland sausage made in Pompeii out of shark’s bollox? I DO NOT know how Waitrose could do this to me, they are EVIL, sick in the skull to pull off this heinous scam. Hampshire is famous for watercress not 🐽s PS the good news is I got a Free Daily Fail with my My Waitrose card, front page is about Prince Andrew’s sausage. From what I've experienced of you on here, Prof, its a fucking miracle you get any sausage at all. Beggars can't be choosers and all that shite... 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ProfB Posted August 11, 2021 Author Report Share Posted August 11, 2021 I am not a beggar, what are you on about? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Roadkill Posted August 11, 2021 Report Share Posted August 11, 2021 1 minute ago, ProfB said: I am not a beggar, what are you on about? Just thought fishy fingers would be more your thing. Entirely innocent observation, whatever innuendo you might be picking up is simply a product of your own sick imagination. Get your mind out of the gutter. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Neil Posted August 11, 2021 Report Share Posted August 11, 2021 Good job you didn't buy alphabeti spaghetti, it could have spelled disaster. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ProfB Posted August 11, 2021 Author Report Share Posted August 11, 2021 6 minutes ago, Neil said: Good job you didn't buy alphabeti spaghetti, it could have spelled disaster. Neil is soo witty 🤭 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ProfB Posted August 11, 2021 Author Report Share Posted August 11, 2021 24 minutes ago, Roadkill said: Just thought fishy fingers would be more your thing. Entirely innocent observation, whatever innuendo you might be picking up is simply a product of your own sick imagination. Get your mind out of the gutter. No, all I could think about as I ate them was that Viking turd pic i uploaded last night. They were rubbery. Going to have to bin them. Fishy fingers indeed. Had swordfish last night - massive fish it is. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ProfB Posted August 11, 2021 Author Report Share Posted August 11, 2021 On 01/08/2021 at 18:25, Roadkill said: Cheese grater, please. I wan't to make this as slow and painful as possible. WTF? I read what it contained: fossilized human feces dug up from a Viking site in York, England. It contains large amounts of meat, pollen grains, cereal bran, and many eggs of whipworm and maw-worm (intestinal parasites). It is on display at the Jorvik Centre in York. It was a bad move those Waitrose sausage - 🤮 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Roadkill Posted August 11, 2021 Report Share Posted August 11, 2021 1 minute ago, ProfB said: I read what it contained: fossilized human feces dug up from a Viking site in York, England. It contains large amounts of meat, pollen grains, cereal bran, and many eggs of whipworm and maw-worm (intestinal parasites). It is on display at the Jorvik Centre in York. It was a bad move those Waitrose sausage - 🤮 Is the quote function fucking up for you too? I said that on another thread. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cuntybaws Posted August 11, 2021 Report Share Posted August 11, 2021 35 minutes ago, ProfB said: Had swordfish last night - massive fish it is. I tried ostrich once. It was nice enough, but I couldn't eat a whole one. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Wolfie Posted August 11, 2021 Report Share Posted August 11, 2021 1 hour ago, ProfB said: I have been 100% scammed by the cunting bastards called Waitrose: my packet of six sausages said LINCOLNSHIRE sausages, once home I saw made from Hampshire boars in tiny writing. The sausage are FUCKING FAKES, had I realised in the store, I would have screamed blue murder at the 4 eyed, wideload, cuntbreed that served me. SHE KNEW I thought they were fully fledged Lincs bangers. What next, Cumberland sausage made in Pompeii out of shark’s bollox? I DO NOT know how Waitrose could do this to me, they are EVIL, sick in the skull to pull off this heinous scam. Hampshire is famous for watercress not 🐽s PS the good news is I got a Free Daily Fail with my My Waitrose card, front page is about Prince Andrew’s sausage. You vacuous freak. A Lincolnshire sausage doesn't have to be manufactured from pigs or in the county from which it shares its name – it merely has to conform with the exacting ingredients to be authentic. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Stubby Pecker Posted August 11, 2021 Report Share Posted August 11, 2021 (edited) 35 minutes ago, ProfB said: I read what it contained: fossilized human feces dug up from a Viking site in York, England. It contains large amounts of meat, pollen grains, cereal bran, and many eggs of whipworm and maw-worm (intestinal parasites). It is on display at the Jorvik Centre in York. It was a bad move those Waitrose sausage - 🤮 Jesus Christ when @dave/joker/arseholes sees this he’ll be wanking himself dry for a fortnight Edited August 11, 2021 by Stubby Pecker ps fuck off dickhead 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
scotty Posted August 11, 2021 Report Share Posted August 11, 2021 5 minutes ago, Wolfie said: You vacuous freak. A Lincolnshire sausage doesn't have to be manufactured from pigs or in the county from which it shares its name – it merely has to conform with the exacting ingredients to be authentic. Don't give me that, wolfie. As you know full well, it's like Cornish pasties, every ingredient has to be sourced in Cornwall and they can only be made there. Of course the pigs in Lincolnshire sausages have to be born, bred and killed in Lincolnshire, it's not rocket science. Or Prof b could just be full of fucking ordure, I can't decide which. 😒 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
White Cunt Posted August 11, 2021 Report Share Posted August 11, 2021 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
King Billy Posted August 11, 2021 Report Share Posted August 11, 2021 1 hour ago, ProfB said: I have been 100% scammed by the cunting bastards called Waitrose: my packet of six sausages said LINCOLNSHIRE sausages, once home I saw made from Hampshire boars in tiny writing. The sausage are FUCKING FAKES, had I realised in the store, I would have screamed blue murder at the 4 eyed, wideload, cuntbreed that served me. SHE KNEW I thought they were fully fledged Lincs bangers. What next, Cumberland sausage made in Pompeii out of shark’s bollox? I DO NOT know how Waitrose could do this to me, they are EVIL, sick in the skull to pull off this heinous scam. Hampshire is famous for watercress not 🐽s PS the good news is I got a Free Daily Fail with my My Waitrose card, front page is about Prince Andrew’s sausage. Absolutely fantastic nom, and I really mean that in case anyone gets confused and thought I was in any way attempting to derail it. However I couldn’t help wondering if you managed to shove all six of the rancid pigmeat torpedoes up your equally rancid dirtbox before typing this daft pile of shit? 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
King Billy Posted August 11, 2021 Report Share Posted August 11, 2021 27 minutes ago, Stubby Pecker said: Jesus Christ when @dave/joker/arseholes sees this he’ll be wanking himself dry for a fortnight The cleaners in this museum would have good cause to strike, as it’s a widely accepted fact that you can’t polish a turd. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ProfB Posted August 11, 2021 Author Report Share Posted August 11, 2021 I have been abused by WAITROSE (again) - I am exposing their dirty deed on the corner - do not mock ProfB xxx Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ProfB Posted August 11, 2021 Author Report Share Posted August 11, 2021 6 minutes ago, King Billy said: The cleaners in this museum would have good cause to strike, as it’s a widely accepted fact that you can’t polish a turd. It's rather glossy, it could be the lighting of course. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Goober Posted August 11, 2021 Report Share Posted August 11, 2021 If I were to ever wonder why one might lose interest in this site I need look no further than this thread. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ProfB Posted August 11, 2021 Author Report Share Posted August 11, 2021 Just now, Goober said: If I were to ever wonder why one might lose interest in this site I need look no further than this thread. Up yours grandad 👴 Love ProfB xxx 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Goober Posted August 11, 2021 Report Share Posted August 11, 2021 46 minutes ago, ProfB said: Up yours grandad 👴 Love ProfB xxx I'm praying for a foot and mouth outbreak on the corner and a compulsory destruction order of every cloven hooved mammal. You add nothing and you're not wanted. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ProfB Posted August 11, 2021 Author Report Share Posted August 11, 2021 44 minutes ago, Goober said: I'm praying for a foot and mouth outbreak on the corner and a compulsory destruction order of every cloven hooved mammal. You add nothing and you're not wanted. 😳 It's an avatar you SPANNER. I ain't a bar lamb. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
PANZER MURPHY Posted August 13, 2021 Report Share Posted August 13, 2021 Poor prof havin terrible luck with the sausage..d'ya still have those frozen Spanish things from ages ago? PANZERMURPHYBABY Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
White Cunt Posted August 13, 2021 Report Share Posted August 13, 2021 5 hours ago, PANZER MURPHY said: Poor prof havin terrible luck with the sausage..d'ya still have those frozen Spanish things from ages ago? PANZERMURPHYBABY Are we short on nibbles, Panz? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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