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Smart watches


Guest Williewhoopassjohnson

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13 minutes ago, Weary&Disgusted said:

I can see a future where people are nagged by the voices of their smart watches to tell them to drink less or change their diet.  Or where your car reports you to the police for speeding.  I am not a Luddite, but when it comes to cars, I really do think we were better off when they didn't have computers embedded in, and anyone with basic knowledge could fix them when they broke down.  I know someone who has been without their car for weeks, because the fault developed couldn't be diagnosed by regular mechanics, all because of unnecessary onboard circuitry making things ridiculously over complicated.  

I had a citreon that had more fucking computers on it than the starship enterprise. Bombing down the M4 once and message came up telling me the 'Pollution sensor faulty. Seek assistance immediately'. Frightened the fucking life out of me. Pulled into the services and has to Google it. Still none the wiser. 

Fucking shit french cars. Bought british instead. Can't beat the Toyota.

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24 minutes ago, ChildeHarold said:

You do go on. What about the electric dildo that keeps you alive every evening?

I try most of the time to actually stick to the topic Chill out Harold. You seem to be an extremely disturbed individual, I worried there may be a shortage of your mental tablets due to Brexit and all that, are you ok Chill out Harold?

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26 minutes ago, Frank said:

DC it never ceases to amaze me the vast difference between some siblings. There’s Mrs C all dressed up to the nines, trim and athletic with a fantastic rack.. wonderful eclectic musical tastes and a extraordinary mind. Then you’ve got the sister.. a skank grossly overweight toothless fucking pig wearing a smart watch, with the brain of a King Billy. 

Would you like to see my Alden collection?

Only if you promise to polish your chukka boot toe cap with dead Harold’s decomposing rectum, Francis.

I’m a Northampton devotee myself.

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2 hours ago, Old Chap Raasclaat said:

This 'smart' technology has gotten out of hand. Smart this and smart that simply for the sake of it, all to please gays, cunt teenagers and women who should be doing the housework etc. My girlfriend told me her mate was wanking her bloke off (whilst wearing a 'smart' watch) and it congratulated her afterwards for walking 10 miles or something. Useless shite for technology obsessed cunts.

As a fellow Londoner, you’ll agree the hard shoulder-less section of the Smart motorway just outside of London is not the brightest of ideas. However, I sincerely hope that when you next find yourself heading west on the M3... broken down and loaded with the entire raasclaat offspring, a great fucking truck wipes the lot of you out.

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2 minutes ago, Frank said:

As a fellow Londoner, you’ll agree the hard shoulder-less section of the Smart motorway just outside of London is not the brightest of ideas. However, I sincerely hope that when you next find yourself heading west on the M3... broken down and loaded with the entire raasclaat offspring, a great fucking truck wipes the lot of you out.

Reported.

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33 minutes ago, ChildeHarold said:

You do go on. What about the electric dildo that keeps you alive every evening?

More worthless wank from the carcass of the Corner who’s just prattled shite for four paragraphs.

You’re loathed and despised, even on the sabbath. Walk towards the light, Cunt...hopefully it’s an oncoming train.

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3 minutes ago, Frank said:

As a fellow Londoner, you’ll agree the hard shoulder-less section of the Smart motorway just outside of London is not the brightest of ideas. However, I sincerely hope that when you next find yourself heading west on the M3... broken down and loaded with the entire raasclaat offspring, a great fucking truck wipes the lot of you out.

Do you live near Moscow road Queensway Frank. Great Greek supermarket there.

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4 minutes ago, Frank said:

As a fellow Londoner, you’ll agree the hard shoulder-less section of the Smart motorway just outside of London is not the brightest of ideas. However, I sincerely hope that when you next find yourself heading west on the M3... broken down and loaded with the entire raasclaat offspring, a great fucking truck wipes the lot of you out.

Frank you thick cunt the M4 goes west the M3 goes south west. You are not only a bitter, fat cunt but also a twisted one. 

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39 minutes ago, Frank said:

DC it never ceases to amaze me the vast difference between some siblings. There’s Mrs C all dressed up to the nines, trim and athletic with a fantastic rack.. wonderful eclectic musical tastes and a extraordinary mind. Then you’ve got the sister.. a skank grossly overweight toothless fucking pig wearing a smart watch, with the brain of a King Billy. 

Would you like to see my Alden collection?

You’ve met her? She was in London last week to be fair. Neil probably would, at a push and purely to keep his averages up. Have you ever made Wisdens?

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7 minutes ago, Frank said:

As a fellow Londoner, you’ll agree the hard shoulder-less section of the Smart motorway just outside of London is not the brightest of ideas. However, I sincerely hope that when you next find yourself heading west on the M3... broken down and loaded with the entire raasclaat offspring, a great fucking truck wipes the lot of you out.

The man is a 40 something childless bender, obese to boot. I don’t think he leaves mothers house very often let alone drive a car. I too want him dead. 

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1 hour ago, Eddie said:

The man is a 40 something childless bender, obese to boot. I don’t think he leaves mothers house very often let alone drive a car. I too want him dead. 

Dear oh dear Eddie, you are now reduced to begging Frank for help, you prat. How did it come to this Eddie, retirement beckons old boy. Despite your dismal efforts to argue with me I'm still here ready to have it out with you. Useless cunt. 

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45 minutes ago, Frank said:

DC it never ceases to amaze me the vast difference between some siblings. There’s Mrs C all dressed up to the nines, trim and athletic with a fantastic rack.. wonderful eclectic musical tastes and an extraordinary mind. Then you’ve got the sister.. a skank grossly overweight toothless fucking pig wearing a smart watch, with the brain of a King Billy. 

Would you like to see my Alden collection?

I've often wondered the reason someone would spend a fucking stupid amount on shoes,Is it just trying to impress others when you tell them what you paid for them? PS It doesn't work.Next time just spend the money on having 'cunt' tattooed on your forehead to save people wondering.

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6 minutes ago, Old Chap Raasclaat said:

Reported again you thick bastard. 

You’ve brought this on yourself, raasclaat. Some of your shit might stick to our weaker (Ape) members, but it won’t wash with me. IP addresses are not entirely accurate but since the recent introduction of the Proper2000 syncromat, I can more or less pin-point the street. You’ve been warned. 

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Just now, Old Chap Raasclaat said:

Dear oh dear Eddie, you are now reduced to begging Frank for help you prat. How did it come to this Eddie, retirement beckons old boy. Despite your dismal efforts to argue with me I'm still here ready to have it out with you. Useless cunt. 

Thick as a brick. 

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5 minutes ago, Neil said:

I've often wondered the reason someone would spend a fucking stupid amount on shoes,Is it just trying to impress others when you tell them what you paid for them? PS It doesn't work.Next time just spend the money on having 'cunt' tattooed on your forehead to save people wondering.

These must have set you back a few quid Neil?

 

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6 minutes ago, Neil said:

I've often wondered the reason someone would spend a fucking stupid amount on shoes,Is it just trying to impress others when you tell them what you paid for them? PS It doesn't work.Next time just spend the money on having 'cunt' tattooed on your forehead to save people wondering.

This is the third repeat, Neil. What are you doing, you fucking idiot? Listen, if you’re not comfortable in your feet, you’ll never be comfortable in the head. It’s as simple as that. 

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50 minutes ago, Old Chap Raasclaat said:

I agree completely. I was going too fast in my car recently and started aquaplaning so I slowed down...only for the computer to tell me I was aquaplaning. You then have the parking aids, camera's etc and it's like you don't have to have much driving ability anymore. It's almost like they are trying to bring in driverless cars...they wouldn't would they?

I see quite a few driverless cars already, just some woman sitting in the drivers seat with their hands on the wheel as if they know what they're doing.

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11 minutes ago, Neil said:

I've often wondered the reason someone would spend a fucking stupid amount on shoes,Is it just trying to impress others when you tell them what you paid for them? PS It doesn't work.Next time just spend the money on having 'cunt' tattooed on your forehead to save people wondering.

Neil, you repetitive cunt.

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