No signs of intelligent life

[Decimus]

24 minutes ago, JohnnySaucePants said:

 Ive actually been, and, who shall remain nameless. Two statements which smack of complete bull shit. FF sake. 

Dish it out you can, take it you cant.  The sad remnants of what the British used to be good at. Taking the piss. 

Thin skinned wanker.  🙂  

I don't really care whether you believe me or not, it's hardly something I would make up for kudos. Bearing in mind I've known him since I was 17, it'd be pretty fucking odd if we'd never shared a jar. 

Tell me another porkie about your five storey, prefab tin house that you erected without planning permission. You're a poor man's Monumental Cunt.

 

[southerncunt]

9 hours ago, JohnnySaucePants said:

 You might change your mind if you hear it speak.

Besides she's a ginger, but maybe if she kept her gob shut.

Kind of woman @southerncunt drags up from his mental wank bank, when his Abbo missus has gone walkabout for a few days in search of bush tucker. 

But each to their own, 

What sorts of blokes are lounging around in your wank bank? Might only be a coincidence that you moved to a pair of islands heaving with sheep too. Your wank bank may indeed not confine itself to Homo sapiens. 
 

You really are a thick cunt, and for fucks sake, sort out your punctuation. At least then it will only be the content of your posts that signals to people that you would never trouble the scorers on Mastermind, and not your contemptuous regard for the conventions of the English language. 
 

Gobby fucking wanker.
 

 

[Dyslexic cnut]

1 hour ago, Decimus said:

I don't really care whether you believe me or not, it's hardly something I would make up for kudos. Bearing in mind I've known him since I was 17, it'd be pretty fucking odd if we'd never shared a jar. 

Tell me another porkie about your five storey, prefab tin house that you erected without planning permission. You're a poor man's Monumental Cunt.

 

I’ve been told this before but can’t find the message. Didn’t MC become @N/A who used to have that Brick Top (Snatch) avatar? I used to read his stuff before I joined the forum....I thought he was an entertaining horrible Cunt.

[Decimus]

40 minutes ago, Dyslexic cnut said:

I’ve been told this before but can’t find the message. Didn’t MC become @N/A who used to have that Brick Top (Snatch) avatar? I used to read his stuff before I joined the forum....I thought he was an entertaining horrible Cunt.

Unlike Johnny, he has provided us with some top entertainment over the years. Here are some of my favourites:

1) Taking a photo of a monthly "wage slip" that he had obviously knocked up on Microsoft Excel himself, showing that he had earnt 10K after tax.

2) Another photo purporting to show the oolitic Cotswold stone of his imaginary mansion, which actually ended up being an image of a half-finished Wickes kitchen made out of breeze blocks painted in mellow cream.

3) A furtive snap of his alleged Audi. This was taken whilst peeking out of a tiny window and zooming in on a parked car 50 metres away that could have been fucking anyone's.

4) A final selfie of him wearing incredibly gay, tight denim shorts, which also displayed his disturbingly child-like and tiny hands.

He really was a complete and utter fucking wanker.

[cuntspotter]

11 minutes ago, Decimus said:

Unlike Johnny, he has provided us with some top entertainment over the years. Here are some of my favourites:

1) Taking a photo of a monthly "wage slip" that he had obviously knocked up on Microsoft Excel himself, showing that he had earnt 10K after tax.

2) Another photo purporting to show the oolitic Cotswold stone of his imaginary mansion, which actually ended up being an image of a half-finished Wickes kitchen made out of breeze blocks painted in mellow cream.

3) A furtive snap of his alleged Audi. This was taken whilst peeking out of a tiny window and zooming in on a parked car 50 metres away that could have been fucking anyone's.

4) A final selfie of him wearing incredibly gay, tight denim shorts, which also displayed his disturbingly child-like and tiny hands.

He really was a complete and utter fucking wanker.

Harsh!

[Decimus]

29 minutes ago, cuntspotter said:

Harsh!

I do miss some of these characters, Spotto, especially the type who would send pictures to try and prove something.

I can remember Jazz getting in a froth when challenged on his expensive Lalique collection. He sent a photo of what appeared to be a mantle piece in a caravan that was lined with dusty cheap cat ornaments that looked like they'd been purchased from some old dear's stall at a boot sale.

[camberwell gypsy]

11 hours ago, JohnnySaucePants said:

 

Just what the fuck did Jagger see in Jerry Hall is what i'd like to know. She really is a truly awful looking horse faced hag.  Although she does seem to have become more massively  gummy as she's aged.  Either that or  she's got a new set of implant screw fixed teeth. Probably so as she wont spit them out and leave them on the end of Rupert  Murdochs shrivelled cock.  Looks like a match made in heaven, He's a wealthy spin doctoring wrinkly old bastard with half a dozen chins, and she's obviously a simple gold digging diva. Both of them complete cunts.

I should imagine he saw a lot in her. Specially as how he could fit his whole head up her snatch. Apparently one day he forgot to take his Foster Grants off and they're still up there to this day. 

[Neil]

9 minutes ago, camberwell gypsy said:

I should imagine he saw a lot in her. Specially as how he could fit his whole head up her snatch. Apparently one day he forgot to take his Foster Grants off and they're still up there to this day. 

If they were up her arse would she have 'Polaroids'?

f-u-c-k  o-f-f

[Neil]

12 hours ago, JohnnySaucePants said:

 

Just what the fuck did Jagger see in Jerry Hall is what i'd like to know. She really is a truly awful looking horse faced hag.  Although she does seem to have become more massively  gummy as she's aged.  Either that or  she's got a new set of implant screw fixed teeth. Probably so as she wont spit them out and leave them on the end of Rupert  Murdochs shrivelled cock.  Looks like a match made in heaven, He's a wealthy spin doctoring wrinkly old bastard with half a dozen chins, and she's obviously a simple gold digging diva. Both of them complete cunts.

Do you think that when they both die and go to heaven that Mick will tell her to get off of his cloud?

I'll get my brown sugar.

[camberwell gypsy]

4 minutes ago, Neil said:

If they were up her arse would she have 'Polaroids'?

f-u-c-k  o-f-f

Elementary my dear Watson. 

[Dyslexic cnut]

11 minutes ago, Neil said:

If they were up her arse would she have 'Polaroids'?

f-u-c-k  o-f-f

Or vagi-focals?

[Guest Weary&Disgusted]

5 hours ago, Decimus said:

Unlike Johnny, he has provided us with some top entertainment over the years. Here are some of my favourites:

1) Taking a photo of a monthly "wage slip" that he had obviously knocked up on Microsoft Excel himself, showing that he had earnt 10K after tax.

2) Another photo purporting to show the oolitic Cotswold stone of his imaginary mansion, which actually ended up being an image of a half-finished Wickes kitchen made out of breeze blocks painted in mellow cream.

3) A furtive snap of his alleged Audi. This was taken whilst peeking out of a tiny window and zooming in on a parked car 50 metres away that could have been fucking anyone's.

4) A final selfie of him wearing incredibly gay, tight denim shorts, which also displayed his disturbingly child-like and tiny hands.

He really was a complete and utter fucking wanker.

To be fair, he could also produce some blackly comic material.  He was quite funny at times.  

[Decimus]

14 minutes ago, JohnnySaucePants said:

could we stop over at your place and sleep in your bed for a night or two.  Im hoping you live in Henley on Thames.   Would this be ok. 

No, Johnny, it wouldn't be ok. I've got three small children and I wouldn't feel comfortable you being anywhere near them after you previously came out with this:

 

[Eric Cuntman]

29 minutes ago, Decimus said:

No, Johnny, it wouldn't be ok. I've got three small children and I wouldn't feel comfortable you being anywhere near them after you previously came out with this:

 

He's quite astonishing isn't he. He's managed to engineer a feud with you, Ape and myself simultaneously. A toy poodle just picked a fight with Cerberus. 

[southerncunt]

55 minutes ago, Eric Cuntman said:

He's quite astonishing isn't he. He's managed to engineer a feud with you, Ape and myself simultaneously. A toy poodle just picked a fight with Cerberus. 

I haven’t dedicated a great deal of time to the twat either, but I’m feeling that might change.

[Eric Cuntman]

1 minute ago, southerncunt said:

I haven’t dedicated a great deal of time to the twat either, but I’m feeling that might change.

You're very welcome. I feel I should apologise on behalf of the UK for polluting your hemisphere with that fucking stupid fucking cunt.

[Eric Cuntman]

26 minutes ago, JohnnySaucePants said:

Haha, it's your own stupid fault you Devvo ( off youtube) wannabe, for threatening to kill me on the cunting cats post. That was funny.

Years ago not long after arriving in this paradise, i was a passenger in a car at night between Hawea and Makarora  on the Haast pass highway. A cat came out of the bush crossing the road and blinded by the lights just stood there. The driver a now good friend, swerved across the road and demolished the fucker, for the hawkes to pick at it's carcase. I'll admit i said nothing and was a bit well, appalled. I altered my view of cats years ago. Hopefully the government at some stage will completely ban the fuckers, as they did with ferrets. 

Here's an article from a local paper. May just educate your "never been out of Blighty mind", but i'm doubtful. 

https://www.stuff.co.nz/environment/123621141/total-nesting-failure--disastrous-breeding-season-for-vulnerable-kaikura-birds

I'll tell you what, i'll offer a truce in return for a sincere and heartfelt apology. 

I love you Eric.. 🙂 🙂 

In the meantime, suck my cheesy dick. 

Just once, fucking ONCE, say something funny.

you have no humour, chutzpah or any recognisable ability to provide entertainment. You are simply going to antagonise the entire membership, Roops will tire of your repetitive, half arsed attempts at trolling, and bury you in the same hole as Salty and Ereptile.

Tumbleweed farming flid.

[Stubby Pecker]

9 hours ago, Decimus said:

Unlike Johnny, he has provided us with some top entertainment over the years. Here are some of my favourites:

1) Taking a photo of a monthly "wage slip" that he had obviously knocked up on Microsoft Excel himself, showing that he had earnt 10K after tax.

2) Another photo purporting to show the oolitic Cotswold stone of his imaginary mansion, which actually ended up being an image of a half-finished Wickes kitchen made out of breeze blocks painted in mellow cream.

3) A furtive snap of his alleged Audi. This was taken whilst peeking out of a tiny window and zooming in on a parked car 50 metres away that could have been fucking anyone's.

4) A final selfie of him wearing incredibly gay, tight denim shorts, which also displayed his disturbingly child-like and tiny hands.

He really was a complete and utter fucking wanker.

As a once pro pebble fondler before graduating to wanking off newts, I believe I was bought in to verify claims his house was knocked up from local cotswold ironstone. It was bullshit of course like most of his pointless fucking arguments with roops- the silly cunt didn’t score a single win against the last word she devil 

Besides his base stupidity and northern ignorance, he did at times provide us with a genuine laugh which is more than can said for these latest outcasts from the sunshine bus.

He’s definitely dead from bat flu- his mrs was a chinky type for starters. 
 

Bring back Manky and Cockfingers 

[Wolfie]

1 hour ago, JohnnySaucePants said:

Haha, it's your own stupid fault you Devvo ( off youtube) wannabe, for threatening to kill me on the cunting cats post. That was funny.

Years ago not long after arriving in this paradise, i was a passenger in a car at night between Hawea and Makarora  on the Haast pass highway. A cat came out of the bush crossing the road and blinded by the lights just stood there. The driver a now good friend, swerved across the road and demolished the fucker, for the hawkes to pick at it's carcase. I'll admit i said nothing and was a bit well, appalled. I altered my view of cats years ago. Hopefully the government at some stage will completely ban the fuckers, as they did with ferrets. 

Here's an article from a local paper. May just educate your "never been out of Blighty mind", but i'm doubtful. 

https://www.stuff.co.nz/environment/123621141/total-nesting-failure--disastrous-breeding-season-for-vulnerable-kaikura-birds

 

Fancy seeing you on a topic entitled 'No signs of intelligent life', Johnny. Why don't you get that Chinky housemaid of yours on the case? Once her instincts kick in, the slitty-eyed Mao bitch will have the cat issue sorted in no time. I bet she ends up serving you blow-torched Kaikōura birds for Sunday lunch, too.

[King Billy]

11 hours ago, Decimus said:

4) A final selfie of him wearing incredibly gay, tight denim shorts, which also displayed his disturbingly child-like and tiny hands.

Frank?

[Eric Cuntman]

4 hours ago, JohnnySaucePants said:

 

I'll tell you what, i'll offer a truce in return for a sincere and heartfelt apology. 

 

...Said the salmon to the shark.

[camberwell gypsy]

3 hours ago, Stubby Pecker said:

As a once pro pebble fondler before graduating to wanking off newts, I believe I was bought in to verify claims his house was knocked up from local cotswold ironstone. It was bullshit of course like most of his pointless fucking arguments with roops- the silly cunt didn’t score a single win against the last word she devil 

Besides his base stupidity and northern ignorance, he did at times provide us with a genuine laugh which is more than can said for these latest outcasts from the sunshine bus.

He’s definitely dead from bat flu- his mrs was a chinky type for starters. 
 

Bring back Manky and Cockfingers 

Strangely enough, I quite used to enjoy waiting for him to clock on late evenings and listen to his rantings. He was entertaining in the way the odd outpatient fruitcake who gets on the 185 bus outside The Maudsley psychiatric hospital was. Quite funny as long as the goofy cunt doesn't sit next to you. 

[Prints Harry]

6 hours ago, Eric Cuntman said:

...Said the salmon to the shark.

Bullhead.

[Prints Harry]

7 hours ago, King Billy said:

Frank?

You.

[Mrs Roops]

13 hours ago, JohnnySaucePants said:

Haha, it's your own stupid fault you Devvo ( off youtube) wannabe, for threatening to kill me on the cunting cats post. That was funny.

Years ago not long after arriving in this paradise, i was a passenger in a car at night between Hawea and Makarora  on the Haast pass highway. A cat came out of the bush crossing the road and blinded by the lights just stood there. The driver a now good friend, swerved across the road and demolished the fucker, for the hawkes to pick at it's carcase. I'll admit i said nothing and was a bit well, appalled. I altered my view of cats years ago. Hopefully the government at some stage will completely ban the fuckers, as they did with ferrets. 

Here's an article from a local paper. May just educate your "never been out of Blighty mind", but i'm doubtful. 

https://www.stuff.co.nz/environment/123621141/total-nesting-failure--disastrous-breeding-season-for-vulnerable-kaikura-birds

I'll tell you what, i'll offer a truce in return for a sincere and heartfelt apology. 

I love you Eric.. 🙂 🙂 

In the meantime, suck my cheesy dick. 

Interesting article...though it appears you've been selling the puntership a false premise. To date you've intimated that the NZ populace considers cats as vermin and that the collective opinion is that they should be culled to the point of extinction.  This view is contrary to the researcher quoted in the article who accepts that cats are much loved pets and that the culling option will never happen in New Zealand. Personally I don't care for the little shits myself though my husband and two of our children are very much cat people, consequently we have four of the furry fucks roaming about the house. That said I abhor cruelty to animals, cats included, furthermore I suspect that New Zealanders and the British share the same disdain towards your warped attitude.