Guest Salty Piss Flap Posted November 20, 2019 Report Share Posted November 20, 2019 They're calling it #Fartgate on Twitter. While CA. Rep Eric Swalwell was answering a question earlier today during an interview by Chris Matthews on his MSNBC show Hardball, a noise was heard that sounded suspiciously like the passing of intestinal gas from a human anus. You decide... It was later "released" by Matthews or someone with the show, that it was only the noise made by sliding a coffee mug across the desk. Hmmmmm..... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dave Umbongo Posted November 20, 2019 Report Share Posted November 20, 2019 Funnily enough, a fart sounds more intelligible than an American accent. Just my opinion, you understand. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Neil Posted November 20, 2019 Report Share Posted November 20, 2019 I wonder if it stank as much as your noms? 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Miles Posted November 20, 2019 Report Share Posted November 20, 2019 1 hour ago, Neil said: I wonder if it stank as much as your noms? Or the inside of your van. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The Beast Posted November 20, 2019 Report Share Posted November 20, 2019 That's a fuckin' ripper. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Eric Cuntman Posted November 20, 2019 Report Share Posted November 20, 2019 This was done on a regular basis by Colonel Gadaffi. Apparently, whenever interviewed, the dialogue would be punctuated by houmous powered trouser pumps. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Decimus Posted November 20, 2019 Report Share Posted November 20, 2019 9 hours ago, Salty Piss Flap said: They're calling it #Fartgate on Twitter. While CA. Rep Eric Swalwell was answering a question earlier today during an interview by Chris Matthews on his MSNBC show Hardball, a noise was heard that sounded suspiciously like the passing of intestinal gas from a human anus. You decide... It was later "released" by Matthews or someone with the show, that it was only the noise made by sliding a coffee mug across the desk. Hmmmmm..... I've accused you on more than one occasion of having the sort of dog shit sense of humour that finds hilarity in fart jokes. Thanks for living up to my incredibly fucking low expectations. 3 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest judgetwi Posted November 20, 2019 Report Share Posted November 20, 2019 Fuck me, we’ve all used that “it was my chair scraping across the floor “ excuse. You could tell the bloke talking was trying very hard not to laugh. Very professional. I would like to have seen his reaction when the methane cloud entered his defenceless nostrils. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Salty Piss Flap Posted November 20, 2019 Report Share Posted November 20, 2019 23 minutes ago, Decimus said: I've accused you on more than one occasion of having the sort of dog shit sense of humour that finds hilarity in fart jokes. Thanks for living up to my incredibly fucking low expectations. Yeah, I guess you're right. Only those who know nothing about humoUr make fart jokes... Idiot. At least I actually have a sense of humor, which puts me one up on you, a bitter, life-hating, narrow-minded asshole who thinks humor only involves hurling insults. You clearly don't even have a clear understanding of what humor is, much less possess the ability to create it. Try to keep that in mind as you go fuck yourself. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Eric Cuntman Posted November 20, 2019 Report Share Posted November 20, 2019 24 minutes ago, judgetwi said: Fuck me, we’ve all used that “it was my chair scraping across the floor “ excuse. You could tell the bloke talking was trying very hard not to laugh. Very professional. I would like to have seen his reaction when the methane cloud entered his defenceless nostrils. I wonder how many times David Blunkett's Labrador got blamed. 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Salty Piss Flap Posted November 20, 2019 Report Share Posted November 20, 2019 8 hours ago, Neil said: I wonder if it stank as much as your noms? Not as bad as your breath after you finish rimming your "husband". Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Wolfie Posted November 20, 2019 Report Share Posted November 20, 2019 47 minutes ago, Salty Piss Flap said: Yeah, I guess you're right. Only those who know nothing about humoUr make fart jokes... Idiot. At least I actually have a sense of humor, which puts me one up on you, a bitter, life-hating, narrow-minded asshole who thinks humor only involves hurling insults. You clearly don't even have a clear understanding of what humor is, much less possess the ability to create it. Try to keep that in mind as you go fuck yourself. Christ Almighty, a hilarious clip of a news presenter farting live on air. Whatever next? A Monty Python upload, in addition to all the other British TV shows & media you've referenced? This is yet another example of your adoration for Britain and its culture, history, humour – specifically because Americans are bereft of all three (you the last in particular, lol). I point you in the direction of my previous post below, you unfunny, obnoxious, balloon-fingered blow off. You keep on proving me right, don't you? On 14/11/2019 at 23:02, Wolfie said: You're downright obsessed with British culture, aren't you? This is why you stumbled upon this abstruse website and, unfortunately for the rest of us, now get on everyone's tits daily. You don't hate the UK at all. I strongly suspect you aspire to be British. Your bitterness, spite and sheer envy is borne from the fact you're trying desperately to be accepted by a bunch of predominantly British commenters on a British website, but sadly (for you), you just can't seem to grasp the lingo. Perhaps this goes some way to explaining why you're so achingly unfunny and repressively Anglophobic. I actually pity you, you fat little sausage-fingered tosser. If you ever make it here, I'm sure we'll all club together and take you out for a few proper beers – that is, not that piss-poor Coors Light watered down Yank-wank you drink over there. We all know Americans can't hold their booze, and this is precisely why I'll take great pleasure in personally tying you to a lamppost at the end of the evening and setting you on fire. Wanker. 5 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Foreskincheese Posted November 20, 2019 Report Share Posted November 20, 2019 20 minutes ago, Wolfie said: Christ Almighty, a hilarious clip of a news presenter farting live on air. Whatever next? A Monty Python upload, in addition to all the other British media you've referenced? This is yet another example of your adoration for Britain and its culture, history, humour – specifically because Americans are bereft of all three (you the last in particular). I point you in the direction of my previous post below, you unfunny, obnoxious, balloon-fingered blow off. You keep on proving me right, don't you? Too fucking right, salty brit flap Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Decimus Posted November 20, 2019 Report Share Posted November 20, 2019 1 hour ago, Salty Piss Flap said: Yeah, I guess you're right. Only those who know nothing about humoUr make fart jokes... Idiot. At least I actually have a sense of humor, which puts me one up on you, a bitter, life-hating, narrow-minded asshole who thinks humor only involves hurling insults. You clearly don't even have a clear understanding of what humor is, much less possess the ability to create it. Try to keep that in mind as you go fuck yourself. I'm not deluded enough to imagine myself as being some sort of comedy genius, but I can say with 100% certainty that I'm funnier than you. You are without doubt the most humourless poster this site has ever known. Even RickfuckingB seems edgy and dangerous in comparison to your dated, pedestrian shite. Bobby Davro cunt. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Salty Piss Flap Posted November 20, 2019 Report Share Posted November 20, 2019 1 hour ago, Wolfie said: Christ Almighty, a hilarious clip of a news presenter farting live on air. Whatever next? A Monty Python upload, in addition to all the other British TV shows & media you've referenced? This is yet another example of your adoration for Britain and its culture, history, humour – specifically because Americans are bereft of all three (you the last in particular, lol). I point you in the direction of my previous post below, you unfunny, obnoxious, balloon-fingered blow off. You keep on proving me right, don't you? I was just making a point, but not surprisingly, it bounced off the side of your thick, concrete skull like a tennis ball dropped from the top of the Empire State Building. I admit that I enjoy certain aspects of British culture, etc. But I am not obsessed with it or enamored of it nor do I walk around injecting British slang or colloquialisms into my speech. There are Americans who do that at various levels. We call them Anglophiles or Britophiles. But I'm not one of them. I merely find your culture amusing in a quaint, different than what I'm accustomed to kind of way. That you think or try to claim it's something more, just belies your own deep-seated envy and insecurity about yourself and your own culture when it comes to the subject of America and Americans. Enjoy the fuck off you've got coming to you. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Salty Piss Flap Posted November 20, 2019 Report Share Posted November 20, 2019 1 hour ago, Decimus said: I'm not deluded enough to imagine myself as being some sort of comedy genius, but I can say with 100% certainty that I'm funnier than you. You are without doubt the most humourless poster this site has ever known. Even RickfuckingB seems edgy and dangerous in comparison to your dated, pedestrian shite. Bobby Davro cunt. Well of course you'd say something as fucking stupid and blatantly absurd as that. You're an over-inflated, blowhard gasbag of a fucking idiot after all and that's a perfect example of the kind of nonsensical prattle that idiots like yourself are known for. Of course, maybe by "funnier than you", you're talking about your goofy, gargoyle looking face. I can imagine you probably just assuming that nobody could have a "funnier" looking face than yours, given your likely history of having it laughed in so many times throughout your life. Sad clownish, Austin Powers looking cunt. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Witheredscrote Posted November 20, 2019 Report Share Posted November 20, 2019 1 hour ago, Decimus said: Even RickfuckingB seems edgy and dangerous in comparison To be honest, I would have preferred 'seemed'. I was hoping the cunt was dead. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Decimus Posted November 20, 2019 Report Share Posted November 20, 2019 16 minutes ago, Witheredscrote said: To be honest, I would have preferred 'seemed'. I was hoping the cunt was dead. Withers, I despise you with every fibre of my being. Grow up and try again. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Salty Piss Flap Posted November 20, 2019 Report Share Posted November 20, 2019 23 minutes ago, Decimus said: Withers, I despise you with every fibre of my being. Grow up and try again. Just another example of your rapier wit and wry, subtle humoUr, Drecky? Stop it, please. You're slaying us. My sides are aching. Have mercy on us. Etc, etc. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cuntybaws Posted November 20, 2019 Report Share Posted November 20, 2019 2 hours ago, Decimus said: I'm not deluded enough to imagine myself as being some sort of comedy genius, but I can say with 100% certainty that I'm funnier than you. You're funnier? Pick one word at random from each list below, combine them, and whatever malady you've derived is funnier than Salty, even the ones as yet unknown to medical science. 1. Terminal, Full-Blown, Tertiary, Late-Stage 2. Anal, Testicular, Brain, Ovarian 3. Cancer, AIDS, Syphilis, Ebola Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest judgetwi Posted November 20, 2019 Report Share Posted November 20, 2019 14 minutes ago, Salty Piss Flap said: Just another example of your rapier wit and wry, subtle humoUr, Drecky? Stop it, please. You're slaying us. My sides are aching. Have mercy on us. Etc, etc. Hey Yank, is it Black Friday this week? I’m looking forward to some new YouTube videos of rednecks battering the shit out of each other over a half price telly. I particularly like two fat black Yank women rolling around the floor shouting “BITCH”!!! and “HO”!!! as they fight over a food blender or a cordless drill. Fucking classic. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Decimus Posted November 20, 2019 Report Share Posted November 20, 2019 21 minutes ago, Salty Piss Flap said: Just another example of your rapier wit and wry, subtle humoUr, Drecky? Stop it, please. You're slaying us. My sides are aching. Have mercy on us. Etc, etc. You wouldn't remember Andy Burnett, RickB or his demented offspring ProfB. But all three of them, including dozens of other degenerates, reprobates and mentalists that have found their way to this site, have made me laugh out loud on at least one occassion. You are the only person to have had over a thousand attempts at being funny who has never even made my lip slightly curl upwards. Fuck off and never come back. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Salty Piss Flap Posted November 20, 2019 Report Share Posted November 20, 2019 1 hour ago, judgetwi said: Hey Yank, is it Black Friday this week? I’m looking forward to some new YouTube videos of rednecks battering the shit out of each other over a half price telly. I particularly like two fat black Yank women rolling around the floor shouting “BITCH”!!! and “HO”!!! as they fight over a food blender or a cordless drill. Fucking classic. We love those over here too!!! 👍🏻 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dave Umbongo Posted November 20, 2019 Report Share Posted November 20, 2019 1 hour ago, judgetwi said: Hey Yank, is it Black Friday this week? I’m looking forward to some new YouTube videos of rednecks battering the shit out of each other over a half price telly. I particularly like two fat black Yank women rolling around the floor shouting “BITCH”!!! and “HO”!!! as they fight over a food blender or a cordless drill. Fucking classic. I feel utterly fucking offended (on behalf of black people & Eddie) that a day when the retailers wheel out all the shit redundant crap they can't usually sell on any other day of the year and they call it 'black' friday. Racist fucking cunts 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Salty Piss Flap Posted November 20, 2019 Report Share Posted November 20, 2019 1 hour ago, Decimus said: You wouldn't remember Andy Burnett, RickB or his demented offspring ProfB. But all three of them, including dozens of other degenerates, reprobates and mentalists that have found their way to this site, have made me laugh out loud on at least one occassion. You are the only person to have had over a thousand attempts at being funny who has never even made my lip slightly curl upwards. Fuck off and never come back. I obviously intimidate you and bring out in you, those old, familiar feelings of inferiority that you've tried so hard your entire life to suppress. As Andy Rooney used to so famously say, as he'd sign off at the end of his weekly segments on 60 Minutes... "I like that." Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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