Decimus Posted February 26, 2019 Report Share Posted February 26, 2019 I can't turn on the telly this week without seeing this coelacanth-faced munter gurning back at me. As far as I'm concerned, her greatest performance to date was in the Bev and Kev adverts. Her emotional range appears to be limited to pulling a face and protruding her already bulbous eyes to display a constant sense of being on the verge of tears. Apparently she's the first British actress to win an Oscar since Kate Winslett. She's absolutely shit as well, but at least I'd fuck her. I wouldn't even wipe my cock on Colman's pig fucking face. 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jiggerycock Posted February 26, 2019 Report Share Posted February 26, 2019 Whilst I'm indifferent, never having watched anything she's been in (or if i have, she hasn't registered with me), the good lady wife is very much in the Decimus camp on this. "She even gurns in that fucking British Airways ad that's on now" intones Mrs Jiggers. "Just look at her being all kooky and irritating!" .......and the crickets rubbed their back legs together 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Eric Cuntman Posted February 26, 2019 Report Share Posted February 26, 2019 24 minutes ago, Decimus said: I can't turn on the telly this week without seeing this coelacanth-faced munter gurning back at me. As far as I'm concerned, her greatest performance to date was in the Bev and Kev adverts. Her emotional range appears to be limited to pulling a face and protruding her already bulbous eyes to display a constant sense of being on the verge of tears. Apparently she's the first British actress to win an Oscar since Kate Winslett. She's absolutely shit as well, but at least I'd fuck her. I wouldn't even wipe my cock on Colman's pig fucking face. She's obviously kissed the right arses to become flavour of the month. She is also another of those detestable hypocrites who scruff up and look teary-eyed, as they make appeals to the public, urging them to donate to charities, just before skipping off with the 40 grand fee, scraped from the charity's coffers. (obviously it won't be coming out of the charity CEOs 1.8 million salary) I hope she gets eaten by Africans. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Decimus Posted February 26, 2019 Author Report Share Posted February 26, 2019 9 minutes ago, Eric Cuntman said: She's obviously kissed the right arses to become flavour of the month. She is also another of those detestable hypocrites who scruff up and look teary-eyed, as they make appeals to the public, urging them to donate to charities, just before skipping off with the 40 grand fee, scraped from the charity's coffers. (obviously it won't be coming out of the charity CEOs 1.8 million salary) I hope she gets eaten by Africans. She came across like an even more spasticated version of Hugh Grant during her Oscar speech. Faux bumbling and an attempt to be endearingly British. It's a shame that Harvey Weinstein wasn't invited this year, I doubt she'd have bumbled and stammered as his little circumcised maggot slipped up her arsehole unannounced. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Neil Posted February 26, 2019 Report Share Posted February 26, 2019 She's fucking mustard! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest 'eavensabove Posted February 26, 2019 Report Share Posted February 26, 2019 (edited) Was she in Gone With The Wind? It was obvious that she farted before stepping up for an award. Edited February 26, 2019 by 'eavensabove Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Eric Cuntman Posted February 26, 2019 Report Share Posted February 26, 2019 5 minutes ago, Decimus said: She came across like an even more spasticated version of Hugh Grant during her Oscar speech. Faux bumbling and an attempt to be endearingly British. It's a shame that Harvey Weinstein wasn't invited this year, I doubt she'd have bumbled and stammered as his little circumcised maggot slipped up her arsehole unannounced. The Oscar was given because it's more fucking LGBT shite. Gotta keep those darkies and perverts happy. I for one am eagerly awaiting an historical epic that explains how Alfred the Great didn't have bowel cancer, he just had a massive cock up his arse. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Eric Cuntman Posted February 26, 2019 Report Share Posted February 26, 2019 7 minutes ago, Neil said: She's fucking mustard! And from Norwich. Presumably why she chose Colman as a name. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
camberwell gypsy Posted February 26, 2019 Report Share Posted February 26, 2019 13 minutes ago, Neil said: She's fucking mustard! That's got to fucking sting Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Decimus Posted February 26, 2019 Author Report Share Posted February 26, 2019 17 minutes ago, Neil said: She's fucking mustard! You know what they say, Neil, "Caister men never turn back". In this instance, I wouldn't hesitate to fucking leg it if I ever saw its Steinway piano teeth descending upon my John Thomas. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Neil Posted February 26, 2019 Report Share Posted February 26, 2019 I suspect you may know what I'm about to say?....I've had worse. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Wizardsleeve Posted February 26, 2019 Report Share Posted February 26, 2019 45 minutes ago, Eric Cuntman said: She's obviously kissed the right arses to become flavour of the month. She is also another of those detestable hypocrites who scruff up and look teary-eyed, as they make appeals to the public, urging them to donate to charities, just before skipping off with the 40 grand fee, scraped from the charity's coffers. (obviously it won't be coming out of the charity CEOs 1.8 million salary) I hope she gets eaten by Africans. I'd prefer Madagascan Cannibal Pygmy Witch Doctors feed their tribes with her festering carcass. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cuntybaws Posted February 26, 2019 Report Share Posted February 26, 2019 She did some full-frontal nudity in "Confetti", which - you guessed it - she now regrets. (Not as much as I fucking regret it, Olivia, believe me!) By the way, I strongly advise you not to do an image search - I Google this shit so you don't have to. Cannot unsee. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest DrCunt Posted February 26, 2019 Report Share Posted February 26, 2019 I watched The Favourite on TV with the missus on Sunday and loathed every fucking nanosecond of it. The sound was grating, it was all weird arty bollocks camera lenses and angles. The lighting was shit. The plot was pandering to the LGBT community (most "experts agree" Queen Anne was not a rug muncher) and the ending was bland as fuck. Pile of shit with a fucking Gresham's cunt in the lead role. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
camberwell gypsy Posted February 26, 2019 Report Share Posted February 26, 2019 1 hour ago, DrCunt said: I watched The Favourite on TV with the missus on Sunday and loathed every fucking nanosecond of it. The sound was grating, it was all weird arty bollocks camera lenses and angles. The lighting was shit. The plot was pandering to the LGBT community (most "experts agree" Queen Anne was not a rug muncher) and the ending was bland as fuck. Pile of shit with fucking Gresham's cunt in the lead role. I've seen it as well as The Green book. I'm still scratching my head wondering how the fuck the actors won an Oscar. Peter O'Toole and Albert Finney must be spinning in their coffins. I should imagine Tom Finney's spinning in his as well. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Decimus Posted February 26, 2019 Author Report Share Posted February 26, 2019 13 minutes ago, DrCunt said: I watched The Favourite on TV with the missus on Sunday and loathed every fucking nanosecond of it. The sound was grating, it was all weird arty bollocks camera lenses and angles. The lighting was shit. The plot was pandering to the LGBT community (most "experts agree" Queen Anne was not a rug muncher) and the ending was bland as fuck. Pile of shit with a fucking Gresham's cunt in the lead role. Did you watch the new Partridge last night? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest DrCunt Posted February 26, 2019 Report Share Posted February 26, 2019 17 minutes ago, Decimus said: Did you watch the new Partridge last night? Was busy last night, planning to watch on iPlayer. Any good? Did manage to watch Jaws last night though. Robert Shaw was a fucking legend and should have got an Oscar nomination for playing Quint. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Decimus Posted February 26, 2019 Author Report Share Posted February 26, 2019 Just now, DrCunt said: Was busy last night, planning to watch on iPlayer. Any good? Did manage to watch Jaws last night though. Robert Shaw was a fucking legend and should have got an Oscar nomination for playing Quint. It wasn't too bad, better than I thought considering it was back on the BBC. Good shout on Jaws, haven't seen it in years, but absolutely love it and he puts in a class performance. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
camberwell gypsy Posted February 26, 2019 Report Share Posted February 26, 2019 George C Scott refused his Oscar saying that it was a 'meat parade' and he didn't want any part of it. Fucking true. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Couldn't give a shit Posted February 26, 2019 Report Share Posted February 26, 2019 51 minutes ago, DrCunt said: I watched The Favourite on TV with the missus on Sunday and loathed every fucking nanosecond of it. The sound was grating, it was all weird arty bollocks camera lenses and angles. The lighting was shit. The plot was pandering to the LGBT community (most "experts agree" Queen Anne was not a rug muncher) and the ending was bland as fuck. Pile of shit with a fucking Gresham's cunt in the lead role. This crap has been dreamed up using contemporary writings from the day. The problem is however, these writings are mainly those of the Whigs that Queen Anne dismissed from office and the rest are by members of her household but not translated correctly into modern English to suit the wank fantasies of militant dykes. Some of the film covers a period before the death of Anne's husband Prince George of Denmark who she was devoted to but doesn't feature at all. In short, 95% of this film is complete bollocks. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Decimus Posted February 26, 2019 Author Report Share Posted February 26, 2019 38 minutes ago, Couldn't give a shit said: This crap has been dreamed up using contemporary writings from the day. The problem is however, these writings are mainly those of the Whigs that Queen Anne dismissed from office and the rest are by members of her household but not translated correctly into modern English to suit the wank fantasies of militant dykes. Some of the film covers a period before the death of Anne's husband Prince George of Denmark who she was devoted to but doesn't feature at all. In short, 95% of this film is complete bollocks. Haven't you heard? Historical accuracy doesn't matter if the figure being portrayed was originally white and heterosexual. It's "inclusive" and "progressive" to rewrite history and shoehorn in black or homosexual characters, no matter how anachronistic this might be. Don't ever fucking think that you can credibly cast Matt Damon into a fictional, fantastical story set in ancient China though, because that's racist whitewashing. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
camberwell gypsy Posted February 26, 2019 Report Share Posted February 26, 2019 2 hours ago, Cuntybaws said: She did some full-frontal nudity in "Confetti", which - you guessed it - she now regrets. (Not as much as I fucking regret it, Olivia, believe me!) By the way, I strongly advise you not to do an image search - I Google this shit so you don't have to. Cannot unsee. Have you asked Neil for his opinion? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
King Billy Posted February 26, 2019 Report Share Posted February 26, 2019 53 minutes ago, Couldn't give a shit said: This crap has been dreamed up using contemporary writings from the day. The problem is however, these writings are mainly those of the Whigs that Queen Anne dismissed from office and the rest are by members of her household but not translated correctly into modern English to suit the wank fantasies of militant dykes. Some of the film covers a period before the death of Anne's husband Prince George of Denmark who she was devoted to but doesn't feature at all. In short, 95% of this film is complete bollocks. The other 5% is hairy scrotum Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
King Billy Posted February 26, 2019 Report Share Posted February 26, 2019 18 minutes ago, Decimus said: Haven't you heard? Historical accuracy doesn't matter if the figure being portrayed was originally white and heterosexual. It's "inclusive" and "progressive" to rewrite history and shoehorn in black or homosexual characters, no matter how anachronistic this might be. Don't ever fucking think that you can credibly cast Matt Damon into a fictional, fantastical story set in ancient China though, because that's racist whitewashing. Spot on. “ Oliver Reed.When real men were still allowed to exist in Hollywood “ the new biopic starring Jussie Smollet as Ollie and Allan Carr as Richard Harris. Featuring Bill Cosby as George Best and Stephen Hawking as Roger Bannister. The untold story Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Last Cunt Standing Posted February 26, 2019 Report Share Posted February 26, 2019 59 minutes ago, Decimus said: Haven't you heard? Historical accuracy doesn't matter if the figure being portrayed was originally white and heterosexual. It's "inclusive" and "progressive" to rewrite history and shoehorn in black or homosexual characters, no matter how anachronistic this might be. Don't ever fucking think that you can credibly cast Matt Damon into a fictional, fantastical story set in ancient China though, because that's racist whitewashing. While we are talking rewriting history, have you had a look at the purported backstory for this Colman creature? https://www.dailymail.co.uk/tvshowbiz/article-6633877/How-Oscar-favourite-Olivia-Colman-penniless-cleaner-lived-friends-attic.html Rumaging about for coppers to buy a potato indeed. Sorry love, but fuck off. I can smell the PR Bullshit from here. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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