Jiggerycock Posted February 12, 2018 Report Share Posted February 12, 2018 Sweet mother of God this takes eons and stardates! You rock up with your prescription for clap, pox and itch (it matters not) and the pharmacy staff go into a huddle to do what, Allah only knows (re-enact the 'When shall we three meet again' Witches scene from Macbeth would be a good guess). The bloody pills / ointment are right there in front of them, but time passes like treacle as they do their pissant little 'Pharmacist two-step', ensuring fuck all gets done very slowly. ......and then you have to confirm your address and that you are not a joyrider on the benefits turnpike and that indeed you do have to pay for your prescriptions and yes it may all only take 10 minutes, but it's 10 minutes of MY time that I'm never going to get back to do something I want to do - so a jihad on these time-stealers! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
colonelkurtz Posted February 12, 2018 Report Share Posted February 12, 2018 I find the 10 minute sit and wait the perfect opportunity to be judgemental and guess the ailments of cunts being served.Maybe clap, systitis, squits,bleeding piles.Be it the smack heads scuttle , the pensioners trudge or the sports/sexual deviant injury limp , the general demeanour is usually a giveaway. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
and Posted February 15, 2018 Report Share Posted February 15, 2018 Happens every time I go to pick up my condom prescription(XXS by the way) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Witheredscrote Posted February 15, 2018 Report Share Posted February 15, 2018 On 12/02/2018 at 3:04 PM, colonelkurtz said: I find the 10 minute sit and wait the perfect opportunity to be judgemental and guess the ailments of cunts being served.Maybe clap, systitis, squits,bleeding piles.Be it the smack heads scuttle , the pensioners trudge or the sports/sexual deviant injury limp , the general demeanour is usually a giveaway. Plus the smell. I should imagine that the Pharmacy in Caister have to fumigate the premises after Decs has picked up his quarterly supply of methadone. The place probably reeks of rotting cabbage and ditch mud. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Wizardsleeve Posted February 15, 2018 Report Share Posted February 15, 2018 On 2/12/2018 at 6:29 AM, Jiggerycock said: Sweet mother of God this takes eons and stardates! You rock up with your prescription for clap, pox and itch (it matters not) and the pharmacy staff go into a huddle to do what, Allah only knows (re-enact the 'When shall we three meet again' Witches scene from Macbeth would be a good guess). The bloody pills / ointment are right there in front of them, but time passes like treacle as they do their pissant little 'Pharmacist two-step', ensuring fuck all gets done very slowly. ......and then you have to confirm your address and that you are not a joyrider on the benefits turnpike and that indeed you do have to pay for your prescriptions and yes it may all only take 10 minutes, but it's 10 minutes of MY time that I'm never going to get back to do something I want to do - so a jihad on these time-stealers! You should consider yourself lucky they didn't begin to lecture you on how to use said intimate medications in front of a queue of other diseased cunts. "Now then Mr. Jiggers, for this medicine to be effective you must apply it to your knob end every six hours, like clock work, else lesions and pus will form. Also, you must inform all of your sexual partners of your condition and urge them to see their doctors at once." The oild grans and retired school mums standing behind you would stare burning holes through your rapidly deflating body on that one. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest judgetwi Posted February 15, 2018 Report Share Posted February 15, 2018 Fuck me, you ask one of the lazy cunts at reception to phone it through to the pharmacy, walk in next day and pick it up. How fucking hard is that? Unless , of course, it is something very embarrassing which you don’t want the receptionist to know about. They are notorious gossips so I am told. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jiggerycock Posted February 15, 2018 Author Report Share Posted February 15, 2018 45 minutes ago, Wizardsleeve said: You should consider yourself lucky they didn't begin to lecture you on how to use said intimate medications in front of a queue of other diseased cunts. "Now then Mr. Jiggers, for this medicine to be effective you must apply it to your knob end every six hours, like clock work, else lesions and pus will form. Also, you must inform all of your sexual partners of your condition and urge them to see their doctors at once." The oild grans and retired school mums standing behind you would stare burning holes through your rapidly deflating body on that one. You labour under the misapprehension I'm still in some kind of 'embarrassment closet', when in fact I'm too long in the fucking tooth for any of that old pony and trap. I saunter up to the counter with a breezy air, slap the Vaseline down and yell, with a happy smile "My Christ the old dirt road is giving me some fearsome gyp today! Old school that is mate,- I'm amazed you still sell it. All this flavoured stuff eh? Eh? Who needs their anus smelling like a tarts windowbox, I mean I ask you?" The fuckers run a mile. 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cuntybaws Posted February 15, 2018 Report Share Posted February 15, 2018 On 12/02/2018 at 11:29 AM, Jiggerycock said: ......and then you have to confirm your address and that you are not a joyrider on the benefits turnpike and that indeed you do have to pay for your prescriptions and yes it may all only take 10 minutes, but it's 10 minutes of MY time that I'm never going to get back to do something I want to do - so a jihad on these time-stealers! Don't ever make the rookie mistake of going on methadone Tuesday (or whatever day is your own local equivalent) otherwise you'll have a very, very long time to reflect on why the underlying model of the NHS is doomed to failure. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Wizardsleeve Posted February 15, 2018 Report Share Posted February 15, 2018 31 minutes ago, Jiggerycock said: You labour under the misapprehension I'm still in some kind of 'embarrassment closet', when in fact I'm too long in the fucking tooth for any of that old pony and trap. I saunter up to the counter with a breezy air, slap the Vaseline down and yell, with a happy smile "My Christ the old dirt road is giving me some fearsome gyp today! Old school that is mate,- I'm amazed you still sell it. All this flavoured stuff eh? Eh? Who needs their anus smelling like a tarts windowbox, I mean I ask you?" The fuckers run a mile. Had I chosen to take the obvious road, and state so eloquently, the facts you have presented, I would have been guilty of presuming the worst. It really was a no win, so I erred on the side of caution. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
scotty Posted February 15, 2018 Report Share Posted February 15, 2018 2 hours ago, Wizardsleeve said: You should consider yourself lucky they didn't begin to lecture you on how to use said intimate medications in front of a queue of other diseased cunts. "Now then Mr. Jiggers, for this medicine to be effective you must apply it to your knob end every six hours, like clock work, else lesions and pus will form. Also, you must inform all of your sexual partners of your condition and urge them to see their doctors at once." The oild grans and retired school mums standing behind you would stare burning holes through your rapidly deflating body on that one. Freudian slip there, wizz? "Oiled grans", you filthy pervert Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Last Cunt Standing Posted February 15, 2018 Report Share Posted February 15, 2018 1 hour ago, Cuntybaws said: Don't ever make the rookie mistake of going on methadone Tuesday (or whatever day is your own local equivalent) otherwise you'll have a very, very long time to reflect on why the underlying model of the NHS is doomed to failure. Out of likes. And avoiding accusations of sycophancy. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Wizardsleeve Posted February 15, 2018 Report Share Posted February 15, 2018 1 hour ago, scotty said: Freudian slip there, wizz? "Oiled grans", you filthy pervert My mistake, that was supposed to be OLD grannies....you might be right on the Freudian slip, my fingers just weren't into the post at the time! I'll sort them out at once! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jiggerycock Posted February 15, 2018 Author Report Share Posted February 15, 2018 16 minutes ago, Wizardsleeve said: My mistake, that was supposed to be OLD grannies....you might be right on the Freudian slip, my fingers just weren't into the post at the time! I'll sort them out at once! No - they were probably knuckle-deep in an oiled granny. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ratcum Posted February 15, 2018 Report Share Posted February 15, 2018 23 minutes ago, Jiggerycock said: No - they were probably knuckle-deep in an oiled granny. Brilliant name for a band Jiggly. Johnnie Foetus and The Coat Hangers salute you Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Stubby Pecker Posted February 15, 2018 Report Share Posted February 15, 2018 2 hours ago, scotty said: Freudian slip there, wizz? "Oiled grans", you filthy pervert Don't fucking knock it till you've tried it you closed minded cunt. I hear on good authority that @Frank always lubes up his grannies before going nuts deep- helps if rigour mortis has set in. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ratcum Posted February 15, 2018 Report Share Posted February 15, 2018 4 hours ago, judgetwi said: Fuck me, you ask one of the lazy cunts at reception to phone it through to the pharmacy, walk in next day and pick it up. How fucking hard is that? Unless , of course, it is something very embarrassing which you don’t want the receptionist to know about. They are notorious gossips so I am told. Can you get your Michael Jackson skin whitener on prescription Jewdy? Get down baby Lay it on me brother ...later Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Stubby Pecker Posted February 15, 2018 Report Share Posted February 15, 2018 6 minutes ago, ratcum said: Can you get your Michael Jackson skin whitener on prescription Jewdy? Get down baby Lay it on me brother ...later Word to yo mutha brutha ratty, you're lyrically black Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ratcum Posted February 15, 2018 Report Share Posted February 15, 2018 1 minute ago, Stubby Pecker said: Word to yo mutha brutha ratty, you're lyrically black doin thangs blud, just doin thangs an pimpin shit Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Stubby Pecker Posted February 15, 2018 Report Share Posted February 15, 2018 4 minutes ago, ratcum said: doin thangs blud, just doin thangs an pimpin shit Shut this jive bollocks and give me a like you goose stepping über cunt of the 4th Reich Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ratcum Posted February 15, 2018 Report Share Posted February 15, 2018 13 minutes ago, Stubby Pecker said: Shut this jive bollocks and give me a like you goose stepping über cunt of the 4th Reich not you with this 'likes' shit as well Stubble? I hate this bollocks and never want to see another like for as long as I rule live. Have some Ratterands instead 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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