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Putting stuff in the loft


Neil

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I fucking hate it when 'er indoors says "can you give me a hand to put this stuff in the loft"...why for fuck sake?,it's fucking junk,we don't use it so just skip the fucking shit.I have so much tosh in my loft that I know will never be used or be of any use to any cunt in the future.The only things in a loft should be insulation,a water tank and maybe a dead prozzie wrapped in an old carpet

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4 minutes ago, Punkape said:

I thought you might be one of his jail visitors along with Rose West.....

You are an utter disgrace, but not as much as a disgrace as the useless fucking mods of this site for allowing your vile, disgusting repeat bollocks to be churned out day after day and for inventing you in the first place. Hilarious comedians they are, indeed 

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9 hours ago, nocti said:

Fucking hell Neil. I expect someone as disturbingly promiscuous as yourself to do better than this. What next, "having to put something in the bin?" That's what lofts are for you daft cunt, old dusty shit and vintage wank pamphlets. 

Thats my fucking point!,no-one needs 'old dusty shit' and wank pamphlets in the loft are as much use as a hard on in a convent.Lofts should have ventilation above a decent quilt insulation,a water tank for gravity fed systems and fuck all else.I realise you think that your 70's clobber will come back into fashion one day but you're too fucking fat to get in the shit now anyway,throw shit away!.Punkers probably has a suitcase full of old butt plugs but at least he'll always be needing them.

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Guest Lady Penelope

There was a German cunt who stored murdered prossies bodies in his loft and then forgot about them and reported the smell of the de-composing bodies to his local council.

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11 hours ago, Neil said:

I fucking hate it when 'er indoors says "can you give me a hand to put this stuff in the loft"...why for fuck sake?,it's fucking junk,we don't use it so just skip the fucking shit.I have so much tosh in my loft that I know will never be used or be of any use to any cunt in the future.The only things in a loft should be insulation,a water tank and maybe a dead prozzie wrapped in an old carpet

You're not fooling anyone with this, Neil, the loft is your special place. I can picture you now, slithering around on the floor like a fat fucking slug. Pressing your diabetes ruined eyes onto the numerous spy holes you've drilled through the floor, desperately trying to coax a semi from your impotent maggot.

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12 hours ago, Neil said:

I fucking hate it when 'er indoors says "can you give me a hand to put this stuff in the loft"...why for fuck sake?,it's fucking junk,we don't use it so just skip the fucking shit.I have so much tosh in my loft that I know will never be used or be of any use to any cunt in the future.The only things in a loft should be insulation,a water tank and maybe a dead prozzie wrapped in an old carpet

I've got a solution for your problem, neil. Next time your wife asks for help storing stuff in your loft, grow a pair of bollocks, put your foot down, and tell her that her back catalogue of readers digest magazines and the clothes she hasn't been able to fit in for 30 years are going in the bin. 

Failing that, head up to the loft, throw a rope over one of the beams, tie a noose, pop your head into it and promptly throw your fat self through the hatch. 

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