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Cancer Inspired Doggerel


Guest Ollyboro

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1 minute ago, ratcum said:

Diana, Diana,

you thick fuckin spanner

Forsook crown and castle

for a w** and a pillar

                                      (Ratcum 2017)

"I'll be buggered if the next generation of this family's going to be raised by the bastard son of a Bedouin camel trader".    (Duke of Edinburgh, 1997)

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On ‎09‎/‎07‎/‎2017 at 10:27 AM, Ollyboro said:

I've spent the night channeling my inner Byron, CB. So, after fucking my sister with my clubfoot, I've so far managed to rhyme "neuroblastoma" with "eternal coma".

I think it would be fitting if the football history books were amended, so that Sunderland's 1973 FA Cup Winning Team becomes The Bradley Lowery 1973 FA Cup Winning Team. The starting 11 would be:

1) Bradley Lowery 2) Little Bradley Lowery 3) Bradley 4) Little Bradley 5) Brave Little Bradley 6) Jermain Defoe's Best Mate Bradley 7) Sunderland's Brave Mascot Little Bradley Lowery 8) Brave Little Bradley 9) Brave Little Bradley As Was 10) Little Brave Bradders 11) John Terry.

All existing commentary to be overdubbed.

 

....and, given a 6 year old with neuroblastoma to beat from two yards,  Peter Lorimer would STILL miss that fucking sitter they tried to turn into 'Save of The Century' by Jim Montgomery!!

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2 hours ago, Eric Cuntman said:

"I'll be buggered if the next generation of this family's going to be raised by the bastard son of a Bedouin camel trader".    (Duke of Edinburgh, 1997)

that doesn't even rhyme Eric, you're fuckin useless at this. Stick to the sub-lingual langoustine

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32 minutes ago, ratcum said:

free verse poetry? You fuckin poofter. Imagine a peeled walrus; that's you that is

'History Today' should have been a programme in it's own right. Fuck knows what happened to Rob Newman, he was much better than that football obsessed cunt who looked like he'd been created by nazi propagandists.

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Guest Wizardsleeve
On 7/8/2017 at 3:38 PM, Manky said:

I am working on converting 'Ride of the Valkyries' to a Haiku poem. It is not quite complete yet but,

Gollum you festering cunt

Your milkround is short.........

 

           Help please

This poem is shit. 

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Guest Wizardsleeve
On 7/8/2017 at 3:38 PM, Manky said:

I am working on converting 'Ride of the Valkyries' to a Haiku poem. It is not quite complete yet but,

Gollum you festering cunt

Your milkround is short.........

 

           Help please

This poem is shit. 

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Guest Manky
8 minutes ago, Wizardsleeve said:

This poem is shit. 

Fucking Poet Laureate are we now?  You wouldn't know a good poem if it kicked you in the 'nads and pissed in your face. Leave culture to those of us with the proper upbringing and talent. Later I will post my version of the Cistern Chapel by Michael and Angelo done on an etch-a-sketch whilst I was pissed.

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Guest Wizardsleeve
8 minutes ago, Manky said:

Fucking Poet Laureate are we now?  You wouldn't know a good poem if it kicked you in the 'nads and pissed in your face. Leave culture to those of us with the proper upbringing and talent. Later I will post my version of the Cistern Chapel by Michael and Angelo done on an etch-a-sketch whilst I was pissed.

You groveling, ungrateful cunt!  You asked for help, I provided it!  If you can't handle the answer, then don't ask the fucking question.

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Guest Manky
10 minutes ago, Wizardsleeve said:

You groveling, ungrateful cunt!  You asked for help, I provided it!  If you can't handle the answer, then don't ask the fucking question.

Us artistic types can be a bit temperamental at times. When I fuck up a statue of Harvey Price made of dog turds and start the male menopause the same day, watch out world

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2 hours ago, Eric Cuntman said:

'History Today' should have been a programme in it's own right. Fuck knows what happened to Rob Newman, he was much better than that football obsessed cunt who looked like he'd been created by nazi propagandists.

You're right about Newman, a genius but a troubled one by all accounts. Baddiel is just an earwig who tries desperately to have some street cool about him. I understand they have recently become pally on Twatter

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1 hour ago, ratcum said:

You're right about Newman, a genius but a troubled one by all accounts. Baddiel is just an earwig who tries desperately to have some street cool about him. I understand they have recently become pally on Twatter

When Newman portrayed the daytime TV presenter who would go into meltdown at the drop of a hat and start screaming, "it's all getting a bit tricky", I suspected the characterisation was based heavily on his own psyche. I imagine he's spent the last 25 years in a dilapidated mansion in the south of France, splattering tortured images onto canvas and not bathing. Still, better than becoming a professional pseudo lad cunt, like Baddiel has.

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1 hour ago, Eric Cuntman said:

When Newman portrayed the daytime TV presenter who would go into meltdown at the drop of a hat and start screaming, "it's all getting a bit tricky", I suspected the characterisation was based heavily on his own psyche. I imagine he's spent the last 25 years in a dilapidated mansion in the south of France, splattering tortured images onto canvas and not bathing. Still, better than becoming a professional pseudo lad cunt, like Baddiel has.

I heard him on radio four a while back, he was shite

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