camberwell gypsy Posted April 3, 2017 Report Share Posted April 3, 2017 Nearly (and should of) slammed into the back of one of these cunts on the way home today. There he was, huge earphones, back to front baseball cap cycling along a main road when all of a sudden riding on two wheels wasn't good enough for this fucking moron. He decides to just cycle on his rear wheel along a busy main road with cars, buses and lorries thundering along. His coup de gras was actually going through a red light. I wonder how skillful he'd be, doing it at 40 mph when someone rear ends the cunt. And don't get me started on the cunts who cycle no handed either. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest DingTheRioja Posted April 3, 2017 Report Share Posted April 3, 2017 11 minutes ago, camberwell gypsy said: Nearly (and should of) slammed into the back of one of these cunts on the way home today. There he was, huge earphones, back to front baseball cap cycling along a main road when all of a sudden riding on two wheels wasn't good enough for this fucking moron. He decides to just cycle on his rear wheel along a busy main road with cars, buses and lorries thundering along. His coup de gras was actually going through a red light. I wonder how skillful he'd be, doing it at 40 mph when someone rear ends the cunt. And don't get me started on the cunts who cycle no handed either. Sorry miss, but the fit bird from Number42 was 'anging outside da corner caff, dead impressed she was, I fink I'm in there... *SPLAT* Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Alfie Noakes Posted April 3, 2017 Report Share Posted April 3, 2017 24 minutes ago, camberwell gypsy said: Nearly (and should of) slammed into the back of one of these cunts on the way home today. There he was, huge earphones, back to front baseball cap cycling along a main road when all of a sudden riding on two wheels wasn't good enough for this fucking moron. He decides to just cycle on his rear wheel along a busy main road with cars, buses and lorries thundering along. His coup de gras was actually going through a red light. I wonder how skillful he'd be, doing it at 40 mph when someone rear ends the cunt. And don't get me started on the cunts who cycle no handed either. If I did that on my Triumph I would be bloody nicked. Hard to identify them without number plates. I do love passing them on hills, laughing all the way. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Manky Posted April 3, 2017 Report Share Posted April 3, 2017 I believe in safety first on my bike. For me that is, not motorists or pedestrians. My bike is such a finely drilled transport mode that I took 2 days off sick and my bike clocked in for me. Today, our postman died at 64. I live at 66 so my mail was late. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Roadkill Posted April 3, 2017 Report Share Posted April 3, 2017 It's getting more and more of an issue these days as cycling becomes increasingly popular that cunts like this decide to take to the roads to be everyone else’s problem. The fact that fully licensed and insured drivers are usually the ones held to account when one of these morons gets themselves killed is bullshit in its highest form. Here ya go, Gyps. Visual therapy: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Snatch Posted April 3, 2017 Report Share Posted April 3, 2017 Don't even attempt road rage in Russia. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Roadkill Posted April 3, 2017 Report Share Posted April 3, 2017 2 minutes ago, Snatch said: Don't even attempt road rage in Russia. Hahahahaha! The way their manly voices turn instantly to girly whimpers. Bunch of steroid mad "tough men". Although I don't get why that guy was pushing his bike down the centre of the road... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Stubby Pecker Posted April 3, 2017 Report Share Posted April 3, 2017 2 hours ago, Alfie Noakes said: If I did that on my Triumph I would be bloody nicked. Hard to identify them without number plates. I do love passing them on hills, laughing all the way. Whenever I'm destroying some hill on my carbon steed and I hear a wining shitty moped or small engined bike coming up behind me I have to race them, absolutely have to. It hurts deep down, where muscle and tendon meets bone but it's worth it to see other road users in awre of my gusto. No handing is ok if your experienced and doing it for a reason, otherwise it's just cuntish as is not wearing a helmet and riding like a cunt. Many car drivers pay decent respect to cyclists but most take too many risks with OUR lives not theirs. I'm just trying to get home from work to see my kids-I told this to some chavy cunt I caught at the lights who'd just overtaken me on a blind corner narrowly avoiding another car a while back. Weasley little prick was like soz bruv didn't mean it an all. He was fat and smoking so will hopefully die a horrible death. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Wizardsleeve Posted April 4, 2017 Report Share Posted April 4, 2017 There is a way to reinstill a bit of humility into these arrogant cunt cycle show offs, and that is to scout their path for a week, if they have a pattern, find a secluded spot, carry a solid stick, such as a handle for a wood splitting maul, when the cunt comes close enough, jam that stick right into the wheel, and listen for the numerous satisfying "snaps" of broken bones when the stupid cunt crashes. As an option, feel free to grab said stick and bludgeon the idiotic spastic to death like a baby fur seal. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
PANZER MURPHY Posted April 4, 2017 Report Share Posted April 4, 2017 I buy my bikes from a local charity they make bikes from bits of discarded bikes ..current one is a dog of a yoke steel frame hybrid commuter frankenbike made with really expensive bits but because it looks raggedy the cunts don't look at it Panzerknacker Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Roadkill Posted April 4, 2017 Report Share Posted April 4, 2017 19 minutes ago, Panzerknacker said: I buy my bikes from a local charity they make bikes from bits of discarded bikes ..current one is a dog of a yoke steel frame hybrid commuter frankenbike made with really expensive bits but because it looks raggedy the cunts don't look at it Panzerknacker So you can't work because of some mysterious condition that means you have to sit around on benefits all day but still leaves you perfectly able to go on leisurely bike rides? Roadkill Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Wizardsleeve Posted April 4, 2017 Report Share Posted April 4, 2017 2 minutes ago, Roadkill said: So you can't work because of some mysterious condition that means you have to sit around on benefits all day but still leaves you perfectly able to go on leisurely bike rides? Roadkill You're shocked by this? LOL Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Roadkill Posted April 4, 2017 Report Share Posted April 4, 2017 Just now, Wizardsleeve said: You're shocked by this? LOL I'm just disappointed. And VERY judgemental. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Roadkill Posted April 4, 2017 Report Share Posted April 4, 2017 40 minutes ago, Wizardsleeve said: There is a way to reinstill a bit of humility into these arrogant cunt cycle show offs, and that is to scout their path for a week, if they have a pattern, find a secluded spot, carry a solid stick, such as a handle for a wood splitting maul, when the cunt comes close enough, jam that stick right into the wheel, and listen for the numerous satisfying "snaps" of broken bones when the stupid cunt crashes. As an option, feel free to grab said stick and bludgeon the idiotic spastic to death like a baby fur seal. Priceless. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Wizardsleeve Posted April 4, 2017 Report Share Posted April 4, 2017 1 minute ago, Roadkill said: I'm just disappointed. And VERY judgemental. Nowt wrong with that. The world needs more of it. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Stubby Pecker Posted April 4, 2017 Report Share Posted April 4, 2017 6 minutes ago, Wizardsleeve said: There is a way to reinstill a bit of humility into these arrogant cunt cycle show offs, and that is to scout their path for a week, if they have a pattern, find a secluded spot, carry a solid stick, such as a handle for a wood splitting maul, when the cunt comes close enough, jam that stick right into the wheel, and listen for the numerous satisfying "snaps" of broken bones when the stupid cunt crashes. As an option, feel free to grab said stick and bludgeon the idiotic spastic to death like a baby fur seal. Harsh, but probably necessary for bike cunts. I'll make sure I sick to the rules of the road or better still dust off my stumpy and stay in the woods. I assume those that get your ire are town and city bikers who get from a to b faster than you by cycling where they want. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
PANZER MURPHY Posted April 4, 2017 Report Share Posted April 4, 2017 22 minutes ago, Roadkill said: So you can't work because of some mysterious condition that means you have to sit around on benefits all day but still leaves you perfectly able to go on leisurely bike rides? Roadkill Mm..thats pretty much it ...be happy for me. Panzerknacker Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Gong Farmer Posted April 4, 2017 Report Share Posted April 4, 2017 I can wheely anything on two wheels, i cunt it up pulling wheelies on both my vintage Vespa and my Kawasaki 600R. When you pull away from the traffic lights pulling a wheely it's last thing anyone expects. Being able to wheely bikes and scooters is a skill that I'm fucking good at it. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Eric Cuntman Posted April 4, 2017 Report Share Posted April 4, 2017 5 minutes ago, Gong Farmer said: I can wheely anything on two wheels, i cunt it up pulling wheelies on both my vintage Vespa and my Kawasaki 600R. When you pull away from the traffic lights pulling a wheely it's last thing anyone expects. Being able to wheely bikes and scooters is a skill that I'm fucking good at it. Anything on two wheels? Do a wheelie on a Segway then, Smarty-Pants. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Gong Farmer Posted April 4, 2017 Report Share Posted April 4, 2017 28 minutes ago, Eric Cuntman said: Anything on two wheels? Do a wheelie on a Segway then, Smarty-Pants. No fucking way, they're far too dangerous. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Eric Cuntman Posted April 4, 2017 Report Share Posted April 4, 2017 Just now, Gong Farmer said: No fucking way, they're far too dangerous. And what a fucking stupid invention, why not just walk, and everyone who uses one looks like a complete unadulterated cunt. Like fatty out of 'Mall Cop'. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Gong Farmer Posted April 4, 2017 Report Share Posted April 4, 2017 30 minutes ago, Eric Cuntman said: And what a fucking stupid invention, why not just walk, and everyone who uses one looks like a complete unadulterated cunt. Like fatty out of 'Mall Cop'. Proof that they are a stupid and dangerous invention comes from the cunt who owned company that builds them. Silly cunt. http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-1315518/Segway-tycoon-Jimi-Heselden-dies-cliff-plunge-scooters.html Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Eric Cuntman Posted April 4, 2017 Report Share Posted April 4, 2017 19 minutes ago, Gong Farmer said: Proof that they are a stupid and dangerous invention comes from the cunt who owned company that builds them. Silly cunt. http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-1315518/Segway-tycoon-Jimi-Heselden-dies-cliff-plunge-scooters.html "You see Markham, we have all the parts of the Segway, but none of them seem to fit"... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
camberwell gypsy Posted April 4, 2017 Author Report Share Posted April 4, 2017 2 hours ago, Eric Cuntman said: And what a fucking stupid invention, why not just walk, and everyone who uses one looks like a complete unadulterated cunt. Like fatty out of 'Mall Cop'. That's true. Was in the sticks last week and saw 8 of these fucking idiots, all in a single file, wearing yellow hi viz jackets and all wearing a yellow crash hat. Going through the forest. I mean how much damage can you do to your head falling off of one of these things? Plus they all were smiling like fucking imbeciles. I'm sure there's a photo of this sort of shite online. But I can't download it on my phone Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Eric Cuntman Posted April 4, 2017 Report Share Posted April 4, 2017 53 minutes ago, camberwell gypsy said: That's true. Was in the sticks last week and saw 8 of these fucking idiots, all in a single file, wearing yellow hi viz jackets and all wearing a yellow crash hat. Going through the forest. I mean how much damage can you do to your head falling off of one of these things? Plus they all were smiling like fucking imbeciles. I'm sure there's a photo of this sort of shite online. But I can't download it on my phone The things you see when you haven't got a flamethrower! 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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