Guest deebom Posted January 21, 2017 Report Share Posted January 21, 2017 Through The Keyhole was shit, Lloyd Grossman was shit, celebrity homes were tedious and uninteresting, which was why it was relegated to daytime TV. Now some stupid TV exec has given it to that cunt Keith Melon and it's back on primetime Saturday night telly. I'm glad I dont watch TV.... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
camberwell gypsy Posted January 21, 2017 Report Share Posted January 21, 2017 Keith Lemon is as funny as pancreatic cancer Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Roadkill Posted January 21, 2017 Report Share Posted January 21, 2017 10 minutes ago, camberwell gypsy said: Keith Lemon is as funny as pancreatic cancer Agreed. But there is a cure... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ratcum Posted January 21, 2017 Report Share Posted January 21, 2017 5 minutes ago, camberwell gypsy said: Keith Lemon is as funny as pancreatic cancer Then Harry Hill is like Dachau on Berocca © Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Roadkill Posted January 21, 2017 Report Share Posted January 21, 2017 2 minutes ago, ratcum said: Then Harry Hill is like Dachau on Berocca © I have a friend who met him at a party once. Apparently he's an incredibly boring monotone twat when he's not talking like a spacker. Used to be a doctor. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Eric Cuntman Posted January 21, 2017 Report Share Posted January 21, 2017 16 minutes ago, Roadkill said: I have a friend who met him at a party once. Apparently he's an incredibly boring monotone twat when he's not talking like a spacker. Used to be a doctor. So did Paul Sinha from ITV's 'The Chase, he gets all the medical questions wrong. This combined with recent experience of NHS Doctors leads me to believe that if you're sick you're better off with google and a drug dealer. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Tata Steely Dan Posted January 22, 2017 Report Share Posted January 22, 2017 I heard that if you stay awake until 2 am and navigate to one of those obscure Freeview channels you can watch Punkape's show Through the Gloryhole. Tell me now, is this true? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
camberwell gypsy Posted January 22, 2017 Report Share Posted January 22, 2017 1 hour ago, Roadkill said: I have a friend who met him at a party once. Apparently he's an incredibly boring monotone twat when he's not talking like a spacker. Used to be a doctor. I did work with him in A&E years ago. He was once on a holiday flight when a call came over the tannoy asking if their was a Dr on board. He thought "fuck this" and waited hoping that there was another quack on board but no one came forward, so reluctantly he stood up and announced that he was a Dr. Of course everyone thought he was taking the piss and told him that this wasnt a joke and to "fucking sit down". Sheepishly he told them that he was actually a qualified quack. Turned out he had to perform an emergency tracheostomy with a coat hanger and a biro. Which to be quite honest is easy as piss for a nurse let alone a Dr. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cap'n Cunt Posted January 22, 2017 Report Share Posted January 22, 2017 2 hours ago, camberwell gypsy said: Keith Lemon is as funny as pancreatic cancer Pancreatic cancer has me in stitches Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Eric Cuntman Posted January 22, 2017 Report Share Posted January 22, 2017 4 minutes ago, camberwell gypsy said: I did work with him in A&E years ago. He was once on a holiday flight when a call came over the tannoy asking if their was a Dr on board. He thought "fuck this" and waited hoping that there was another quack on board but no one came forward, so reluctantly he stood up and announced that he was a Dr. Of course everyone thought he was taking the piss and told him that this wasnt a joke and to "fucking sit down". Sheepishly he told them that he was actually a qualified quack. Turned out he had to perform an emergency tracheostomy with a coat hanger and a biro. Which to be quite honest is easy as piss for a nurse let alone a Dr. The cunt should have been better prepared, a Swann Morton number 3 is easily concealed, ask any football hooligan. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Tata Steely Dan Posted January 22, 2017 Report Share Posted January 22, 2017 12 minutes ago, camberwell gypsy said: Turned out he had to perform an emergency tracheostomy with a coat hanger and a biro. Oddly enough they use a similar technique to make tattoos in prison. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
camberwell gypsy Posted January 22, 2017 Report Share Posted January 22, 2017 8 minutes ago, Eric Cuntman said: The cunt should have been better prepared, a Swann Morton number 3 is easily concealed, ask any football hooligan. I don't know any football hooligan. I don't move in the same circles as you. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Eric Cuntman Posted January 22, 2017 Report Share Posted January 22, 2017 7 minutes ago, camberwell gypsy said: I don't know any football hooligan. I don't move in the same circles as you. I bet you know a lot of people who've cut and stabbed people though, and get paid for it. And I don't move in circles, both my legs are the same length. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
camberwell gypsy Posted January 22, 2017 Report Share Posted January 22, 2017 13 minutes ago, Tata Steely Dan said: Oddly enough they use a similar technique to make tattoos in prison. Nurse nurse, can I have some Lorazapam please? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Eric Cuntman Posted January 22, 2017 Report Share Posted January 22, 2017 8 minutes ago, camberwell gypsy said: Nurse nurse, can I have some Lorazapam please? Benzodiazepines are fun aren't they. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
camberwell gypsy Posted January 22, 2017 Report Share Posted January 22, 2017 12 minutes ago, Eric Cuntman said: Benzodiazepines are fun aren't they. Can't fucking sleep. You doze off and then get woken up by a fucking nurse jamming a thermometer in your ear. I'm recovering from an op, I ain't got the fucking flu. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Eric Cuntman Posted January 22, 2017 Report Share Posted January 22, 2017 3 minutes ago, camberwell gypsy said: Can't fucking sleep. You doze off and then get woken up by a fucking nurse jamming a thermometer in your ear. I'm recovering from an op, I ain't got the fucking flu. Checking to make sure you're below 37.5, sepsis is bad. You know better than me. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
camberwell gypsy Posted January 22, 2017 Report Share Posted January 22, 2017 2 minutes ago, Eric Cuntman said: Checking to make sure you're below 37.5, sepsis is bad. You know better than me. Fuck it. I'm going sleep. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Witheredscrote Posted January 22, 2017 Report Share Posted January 22, 2017 7 hours ago, Cap'n Cunt said: Pancreatic cancer has me in stitches We try not to mention cancer on this site, it's inconsiderate. Especially as poor old Bubba is not in good health. Just saying. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Wolfie Posted January 22, 2017 Report Share Posted January 22, 2017 7 hours ago, camberwell gypsy said: Can't fucking sleep. You doze off and then get woken up by a fucking nurse jamming a thermometer in your ear. I'm recovering from an op, I ain't got the fucking flu. Did the doctor insert a lubricated finger into your bottom, and ask you to cough, to examine for post-operative abnormalities? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Lady Penelope Posted January 22, 2017 Report Share Posted January 22, 2017 13 minutes ago, Witheredscrote said: We try not to mention cancer on this site. What about scorpio and capricorn? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Wolfie Posted January 22, 2017 Report Share Posted January 22, 2017 3 minutes ago, Lady Penelope said: What about scorpio and capricorn? That one had me in Pisces. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Witheredscrote Posted January 22, 2017 Report Share Posted January 22, 2017 23 minutes ago, Wolfie said: That one had me in Pisces. Stop encouraging the sad old cunt. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Lady Penelope Posted January 22, 2017 Report Share Posted January 22, 2017 1 hour ago, Witheredscrote said: Stop encouraging the sad old cunt. Are you Taurus .. you are a bit of a bully Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest DingTheRioja Posted January 22, 2017 Report Share Posted January 22, 2017 10 hours ago, camberwell gypsy said: I did work with him in A&E years ago. He was once on a holiday flight when a call came over the tannoy asking if their was a Dr on board. He thought "fuck this" and waited hoping that there was another quack on board but no one came forward, so reluctantly he stood up and announced that he was a Dr. Of course everyone thought he was taking the piss and told him that this wasnt a joke and to "fucking sit down". Sheepishly he told them that he was actually a qualified quack. Turned out he had to perform an emergency tracheostomy with a coat hanger and a biro. Which to be quite honest is easy as piss for a nurse let alone a Dr. I can think of better things to do with a coathanger and a biro in his presence... 2 hours ago, Witheredscrote said: We try not to mention cancer on this site, it's inconsiderate. Especially as poor old Bubba is not in good health. Just saying. Don't tease! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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