Witheredscrote Posted December 22, 2016 Report Share Posted December 22, 2016 The latest Tesco's Christmas advert. First you have Tesco, biggest cunts of all. Secondly you have the very unfunny Ben Miller being a cunt. Last but not least you have the freeloading uncle who has visited for 2 days and stays for a week, and yes, the old cunt is Welsh. He tells Ben that the port is hidden under the sink behind the Domestos!, an opportunity not to be missed. I keep seeing this shit whilst waiting for Charlize Theron to tell me about J'adore, whilst she splashes her minge with sea water. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Manky Posted December 22, 2016 Report Share Posted December 22, 2016 Why should you be allowed to comment on TESCO, as it probably stands for ,The English Supermarket Company' and doesn't mention hirsute, smelly French women anywhere at all? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Witheredscrote Posted December 22, 2016 Author Report Share Posted December 22, 2016 1 minute ago, Manky said: Why should you be allowed to comment on TESCO, as it probably stands for ,The English Supermarket Company' and doesn't mention hirsute, smelly French women anywhere at all? Have you ever stood at a Tesco fish counter. la meme chose. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Manky Posted December 22, 2016 Report Share Posted December 22, 2016 5 minutes ago, Witheredscrote said: Have you ever stood at a Tesco fish counter. la meme chose. 'la meme chose'? Are you fucking calling me a fucking faggott you fucking gay cheese eating surrender fucking monkey. Speak English or die you Gallic, beret wearing, onion eating, pig shagging twat. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Witheredscrote Posted December 22, 2016 Author Report Share Posted December 22, 2016 3 minutes ago, Manky said: 'la meme chose'? Are you fucking calling me a fucking faggott you fucking gay cheese eating surrender fucking monkey. Speak English or die you Gallic, beret wearing, onion eating, pig shagging twat. Goose, pay attention. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Manky Posted December 22, 2016 Report Share Posted December 22, 2016 6 minutes ago, Witheredscrote said: Goose, pay attention. I assume your phrase 'la meme chose' is froggie for " pass me another goose, I've just split this one" Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest DingTheRioja Posted December 22, 2016 Report Share Posted December 22, 2016 5 hours ago, Witheredscrote said: The latest Tesco's Christmas advert. First you have Tesco, biggest cunts of all. Secondly you have the very unfunny Ben Miller being a cunt. Last but not least you have the freeloading uncle who has visited for 2 days and stays for a week, and yes, the old cunt is Welsh. He tells Ben that the port is hidden under the sink behind the Domestos!, an opportunity not to be missed. I keep seeing this shit whilst waiting for Charlize Theron to tell me about J'adore, whilst she splashes her minge with sea water. Charlize Theron is, in those adverts, possibly the sexiest fucking thing on this planet, I'd crawl naked over all your dead and cold bodies, coated in glass, rocksalt, cyanide, and any other shit just to get within a mile of her.... Don't tell Mrs Ding... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Lady Penelope Posted December 23, 2016 Report Share Posted December 23, 2016 Does anyone still have a "pocket tap"? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
camberwell gypsy Posted December 23, 2016 Report Share Posted December 23, 2016 36 minutes ago, Lady Penelope said: Does anyone still have a "pocket tap"? I have. I think it's these knickers. They're a bit tight Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Eric Cuntman Posted December 24, 2016 Report Share Posted December 24, 2016 On 22 December 2016 at 5:17 PM, Witheredscrote said: The latest Tesco's Christmas advert. First you have Tesco, biggest cunts of all. Secondly you have the very unfunny Ben Miller being a cunt. Last but not least you have the freeloading uncle who has visited for 2 days and stays for a week, and yes, the old cunt is Welsh. He tells Ben that the port is hidden under the sink behind the Domestos!, an opportunity not to be missed. I keep seeing this shit whilst waiting for Charlize Theron to tell me about J'adore, whilst she splashes her minge with sea water. These adverts were funny when the couple had a retard son. "I found this lightbulb, it's gluten free". Presumably the character was dropped for fear of offending retards. Fucking PC cunts censor the fun out of everything. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
PANZER MURPHY Posted December 25, 2016 Report Share Posted December 25, 2016 They should show jo n whatever yer man's name is buying a tescos wreath for the retard sons grave and that would tie up that loose end Panzerknacker Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Decimus Posted December 25, 2016 Report Share Posted December 25, 2016 On 22/12/2016 at 5:17 PM, Witheredscrote said: The latest Tesco's Christmas advert. First you have Tesco, biggest cunts of all. Secondly you have the very unfunny Ben Miller being a cunt. Last but not least you have the freeloading uncle who has visited for 2 days and stays for a week, and yes, the old cunt is Welsh. He tells Ben that the port is hidden under the sink behind the Domestos!, an opportunity not to be missed. I keep seeing this shit whilst waiting for Charlize Theron to tell me about J'adore, whilst she splashes her minge with sea water. I'm fucking smashed Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Witheredscrote Posted December 25, 2016 Author Report Share Posted December 25, 2016 28 minutes ago, Decimus said: I'm fucking smashed I am celebrating the birth of Our Lord Jesus Christ. So you can fuck right off. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Decimus Posted December 25, 2016 Report Share Posted December 25, 2016 We worship Black Shuck around these parts. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ratcum Posted December 25, 2016 Report Share Posted December 25, 2016 1 hour ago, Decimus said: We worship Black Shuck around these parts. I didn't know what this was until I listened to The Darkness. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ratcum Posted December 25, 2016 Report Share Posted December 25, 2016 1 hour ago, Witheredscrote said: I am celebrating the birth of Our Lord Jesus Christ. So you can fuck right off. You know his surname was Cohen don't you Scrotely? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest deebom Posted December 25, 2016 Report Share Posted December 25, 2016 I like the bird from Cbeebies with one arm. They should have her in the ad, holding a shopping basket with her 'good' arm, while trying to reach for a packet of tampons on the top shelf with the other one. Then Prunella Scales could come along and get them down for her, making an amusing quip about the spacky arm. It would finish with them both rollerblading off into the distance. Every little helps. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Eric Cuntman Posted December 25, 2016 Report Share Posted December 25, 2016 6 hours ago, Decimus said: I'm fucking smashed Me too Decs. Mrs Cuntmans' daughter bought me a litre of Jim Beam and I'm happy as a sandboy. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Drew P Pissflaps Posted December 28, 2016 Report Share Posted December 28, 2016 On Sunday, December 25, 2016 at 3:09 PM, Decimus said: We worship Black Shuck around these parts. You racist cunt. I prefer the alternate name of Black Shag, I have fond memories. Although, to be fair she turned out to be a bit of a dog too. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Alfie Noakes Posted December 28, 2016 Report Share Posted December 28, 2016 On 22/12/2016 at 5:33 PM, Manky said: Why should you be allowed to comment on TESCO, as it probably stands for ,The English Supermarket Company' and doesn't mention hirsute, smelly French women anywhere at all? Manky mate I hope you are joking. Would it upset the xenophobic on here that It was made up of the founder Jack Cohen's name and the name of his first tea supplier Thomas Edward Stockwell? The bigots amongst you need to remember there are many great British companies started by Jewish immigrants or their decendants. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest DingTheRioja Posted December 28, 2016 Report Share Posted December 28, 2016 On 25/12/2016 at 8:51 PM, Eric Cuntman said: Me too Decs. Mrs Cuntmans' daughter bought me a litre of Jim Beam and I'm happy as a sandboy. You lucky, lucky cunt, that sounds very much like the perfect Step-Daughter.... ...unless she's changed it for Harpic, then we're the lucky cunts. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Eric Cuntman Posted December 28, 2016 Report Share Posted December 28, 2016 1 hour ago, DingTheRioja said: You lucky, lucky cunt, that sounds very much like the perfect Step-Daughter.... ...unless she's changed it for Harpic, then we're the lucky cunts. Swarthy northern peasant! We southern gentlemen only drink Domestos, it has a cleaner, fruitier nose and produces a shiny white poo the following day. Harpic is only consumed by the dribbling misplaced Yorkshiremen who inhabit our bus shelters and shop doorways. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Manky Posted December 28, 2016 Report Share Posted December 28, 2016 2 hours ago, Alfie Noakes said: Manky mate I hope you are joking. Would it upset the xenophobic on here that It was made up of the founder Jack Cohen's name and the name of his first tea supplier Thomas Edward Stockwell? The bigots amongst you need to remember there are many great British companies started by Jewish immigrants or their decendants. I must have a dig at Freddie the Frog using the tools available. One of them is sophistry. I am aware of the roots of TESCO's name but chose not to use the facts to enable me to assail the garlic eating goose shagger from an unexpected angle. I prefer to play white at chess. That is obviously because I am racist and not because white goes first. Fuck off with your accusations of antisemitism that were totally unfounded. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Alfie Noakes Posted December 28, 2016 Report Share Posted December 28, 2016 2 hours ago, Manky said: I must have a dig at Freddie the Frog using the tools available. One of them is sophistry. I am aware of the roots of TESCO's name but chose not to use the facts to enable me to assail the garlic eating goose shagger from an unexpected angle. I prefer to play white at chess. That is obviously because I am racist and not because white goes first. Fuck off with your accusations of antisemitism that were totally unfounded. I never accused you of anything manky. Certainly not anti-semitism. Only those here with a guilty conscience should bite! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Manky Posted December 28, 2016 Report Share Posted December 28, 2016 37 minutes ago, Alfie Noakes said: I never accused you of anything manky. Certainly not anti-semitism. Only those here with a guilty conscience should bite! You want the truth. I don't hate any particular group. I will happily use ANY group and ANY reason to beat some cunt around the head. Jews, Freemasons, MUFC Supporters Club, NAACP, Equita and Humanity are all closed shops to me and all get treated with the same respect, or lack of. Fuck the lot of them. Life is too short to take too seriously Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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