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Guest Ollyboro

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Guest Wizardsleeve
6 hours ago, camberwell gypsy said:

About time someone told him to fuck himself. Wished I'd said it. 

We all would have been deprived of a littany of witty and clever "never heard of her" posts.  The corner wouldn't have been the same.  

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Now that the running about and chucking things one and the jumping from high up into water one have failed miserably 
and not got the first place prizes that the super soaraway Sun have been predicting were nailed on for months will they now be reviled as 
cunts in the same way as the footballers were when they fucked up in the EU competition thing and let the entire country down.
By the way , where the fuck is Eddie Wareing and the "other one" , they knew what they were talking about when 
commentating. 


 

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Only 20% of the 'volunteers' have turned up for the games once they had collected their complimentary goodie bags and nice uniforms. (Probably paid for out of our overseas development budget) Compare this to the volunteers at the 2012 London Olympics and the 2002 Manchester Commonwealth Games where the participation of the volunteers made a massive contribution to the success of both events and it reinforces my belief that Johnny Foreigner is a cunt and can't be trusted.

And we are doing OK.

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Guest Wizardsleeve
5 minutes ago, mothra said:

The women's hockey is better. I've got a mate over there stealing their knickers at the end of every game. How much should I charge?

I should think that would depend on the buyer.  

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Guest Ollyboro
5 hours ago, mothra said:

The women's hockey is better. I've got a mate over there stealing their knickers at the end of every game. How much should I charge?

Jellers man, the fucking Japanese have got the used panties market sewn up. Your mate's gonna need a USP, such as blood or dried shit. I'd advise he gets certificates of authentication confirming the shit and blood originated from one of the hockey players. 25 years ago you could get away with forcing your Nan to wear a pair, then passing them off as  a Moira Stewart original, but since the advent of DNA testing you'd be leaving yourself wide open. Just bear me in mind......mates rates.

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49 minutes ago, Ollyboro said:

Jellers man, the fucking Japanese have got the used panties market sewn up. Your mate's gonna need a USP, such as blood or dried shit. I'd advise he gets certificates of authentication confirming the shit and blood originated from one of the hockey players. 25 years ago you could get away with forcing your Nan to wear a pair, then passing them off as  a Moira Stewart original, but since the advent of DNA testing you'd be leaving yourself wide open. Just bear me in mind......mates rates.

Perhaps a partnership OB? We could go on Dragons' Den and ask for Debra Meaden's knickers as part of any deal. I bagsy the chance to beat up that cross eyed toffee jouster.

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Guest Ollyboro
10 minutes ago, mothra said:

Perhaps a partnership OB? We could go on Dragons' Den and ask for Debra Meaden's knickers as part of any deal. I bagsy the chance to beat up that cross eyed toffee jouster.

Deal. But, I wouldn't expect Meaden's apple catchers to be anything less than 6 inches on the sides, with a strengthened gusset and reinforced cockhole. She doesn't get them from Sainsbury's.

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23 minutes ago, Ollyboro said:

Deal. But, I wouldn't expect Meaden's apple catchers to be anything less than 6 inches on the sides, with a strengthened gusset and reinforced cockhole. She doesn't get them from Sainsbury's.

I heard she has to get hers from Go Outdoors. Which funnily enough is what she's always told to do when it's time to change them. By which point they resemble something like Jabba the Hutt's hammock, and often need to be snapped many times to get them into an industrial washing machine.

I'd steer clear and concentrate on the hockey girls, Olly. At the very least, it's a tad safer.

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Guest Ollyboro
42 minutes ago, nocti said:

I heard she has to get hers from Go Outdoors. Which funnily enough is what she's always told to do when it's time to change them. By which point they resemble something like Jabba the Hutt's hammock, and often need to be snapped many times to get them into an industrial washing machine.

I'd steer clear and concentrate on the hockey girls, Olly. At the very least, it's a tad safer.

These hockey girls aren't like the ones I would wistfully look across at from the football pitch, during school games. The referee hasn't got a hard on for starters.

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Guest Wizardsleeve
3 hours ago, Ollyboro said:

These hockey girls aren't like the ones I would wistfully look across at from the football pitch, during school games. The referee hasn't got a hard on for starters.

If your eyes look up just a little, you'll see two smaller hard ons.  However, don't gaze directly into the eyes, lest you turn to stone.  

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Guest DingTheRioja
12 hours ago, Ollyboro said:

These hockey girls aren't like the ones I would wistfully look across at from the football pitch, during school games. The referee hasn't got a hard on for starters.

Didn't know you were at my school... or is it that every gamesmaster has a permenant hard on, either on the girls hockey pitch or in the boys dressing rooms depending on which side they bat for?

 

Anyway, back to the fuck tom daley routine... Piers Morgan reckons anyone who hasn't won gold is a loser...

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Guest Alfie Noakes
On 16/08/2016 at 10:43 PM, mothra said:

If we beat the triads I’ll suck out my pancreas and wear it as a cravat.

Please film it and post it on here. It would beat any of frank's.

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Evidently, of Yorkshire was a country it would be 18th in the world table. That is fuck all, Lancashire would be 15th. Jason Kenny won't train with me. He says that when he is trying to catch me at the Velodrome, my kebab and bitter flavoured farts nearly knock him out.

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I saw that 2 carpet munchers, as a "wife wife" arrangement, represented GB in the women's Olympic hockey and one of them was the fucking team Captain.

Utterly disgusting and disgraceful. They should never have been picked in the first place on moral grounds. They corrupt other team members as set a depraved example to the young.

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10 minutes ago, Jiggerycock said:

See that little Cunt Tom Daley has fucked up again.

Got as far as the semi (pause .....).

He really is the most high-profile example of 'style over substance' when it comes to what he's actually achieved as an athlete

I agree with jiggly on this. Evel Knievel was exactly the same

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