Bubba C Posted July 1, 2016 Report Share Posted July 1, 2016 In this day and age, who other than agency labourers, hitchhiker-murdering lorry drivers or northerners would buy anything to put in their mouths from one of these shit-holes? Surely these botulism and salmonella factories should be shut down on health inspection grounds? Never mind the constant exhaust fumes that permeate every bit of food and drink they stock. 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Fatty Posted July 1, 2016 Report Share Posted July 1, 2016 Num Num Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
southerncunt Posted July 1, 2016 Report Share Posted July 1, 2016 Could have put money on fatty being the first to respond. Corpulent cunt. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Drew P Pissflaps Posted July 1, 2016 Report Share Posted July 1, 2016 Not that I use these establishments but I imagine they are more competitively priced than the average Granada services where you can indulge yourself with an egg sarnie for over £3. I particularly like the ones with the garden furniture strewn about the lay-by where you can really relax while traffic bombs past within feet of you. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Eddie Posted July 1, 2016 Report Share Posted July 1, 2016 Staffed by fat traveler women with bad shoulder tats and dirty fingernails, obese lorry drivers sit on broken, cheap plastic garden furniture buckling under their colossal frames. Tea is served hotter than the surface of the sun in Styrofoam cups and their food is a health risk. Still preferable than going to the chav's favorite Nando's, reheated dog shit and chips. Beautiful. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Manky Posted July 1, 2016 Report Share Posted July 1, 2016 I take Mrs Manky to a burger van every time it is her birthday. She knows she is well treated. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Bubba C Posted July 1, 2016 Author Report Share Posted July 1, 2016 23 minutes ago, Eddie said: Staffed by fat traveler women with bad shoulder tats and dirty fingernails, obese lorry drivers sit on broken, cheap plastic garden furniture buckling under their colossal frames. Tea is served hotter than the surface of the sun in Styrofoam cups and their food is a health risk. Still preferable than going to the chav's favorite Nando's, reheated dog shit and chips. Beautiful. Indeed, Mr Ed. The 'chefs' of these establishments also wring their lank, greasy hair into the deep fat fryer each morning before using it to cook throughout the day; for everything from sausages to chips to mars bars (for the disgusting scotch cunts) to tiramisu. Vile. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Fatty Posted July 1, 2016 Report Share Posted July 1, 2016 6 minutes ago, Bubba C said: Indeed, Mr Ed. The 'chefs' of these establishments also wring their lank, greasy hair into the deep fat fryer each morning before using it to cook throughout the day; for everything from sausages to chips to mars bars (for the disgusting scotch cunts) to tiramisu. Vile. It does however make a change from my normal breakfast haunt at the Ivy Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Fatty Posted July 1, 2016 Report Share Posted July 1, 2016 Just now, Fatty said: It does however make a change from my normal breakfast haunt at the Ivy Or Claridges if I really want to push the boat out or if Eddie is paying Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Eddie Posted July 1, 2016 Report Share Posted July 1, 2016 Just now, Fatty said: Or Claridges if I really want to push the boat out or if Eddie is paying Only if I use the expense account, you gargantuan blob of shit. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest BrothersQuim Posted July 1, 2016 Report Share Posted July 1, 2016 17 minutes ago, Fatty said: Or Claridges if I really want to push the boat out or if Eddie is paying I really don't understand why you feel the need to brag about you and Eddie bin diving behind such a fine establishment, considering the last time you went in the front door this happened, mind you it is nice to see withered working hard for once. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
camberwell gypsy Posted July 1, 2016 Report Share Posted July 1, 2016 1 hour ago, Fatty said: Num Num Brum Brum That's my other car impression. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
camberwell gypsy Posted July 1, 2016 Report Share Posted July 1, 2016 50 minutes ago, Manky said: I take Mrs Manky to a burger van every time it is her birthday. She knows she is well treated. She's a very lucky woman to have you Manky. And don't let her tell you any different. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest BrothersQuim Posted July 1, 2016 Report Share Posted July 1, 2016 30 minutes ago, camberwell gypsy said: Brum Brum That's my other car impression. Punk said last time he went down on you it sounded more like a squeaking fan belt than a brum noise, he also mentioned it smelling like a mechanics overalls, just with more stains. I think you may want to have a word with the slanderous little Nigerian cock worshipper is all Gypps. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Bubba C Posted July 1, 2016 Author Report Share Posted July 1, 2016 39 minutes ago, Fatty said: It does however make a change from my normal breakfast haunt at the Ivy Didn't realise they do an all-you-can-eat for a tenner. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
scotty Posted July 1, 2016 Report Share Posted July 1, 2016 Nice work bubbles. Decent nomnomnom. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest BrothersQuim Posted July 1, 2016 Report Share Posted July 1, 2016 On topic though, the worst burger van I have ever seen was one that parked literally outside of an abattoir. I honestly don't know how the cunts could sit there and tuck in with that smell emanating from the building behind them, the death crys of the cows and sheep & sudden bang as the bolt gun went to work. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Fatty Posted July 1, 2016 Report Share Posted July 1, 2016 46 minutes ago, Bubba C said: Didn't realise they do an all-you-can-eat for a tenner. Sadly not, it's nearly £175.00 for me and Edds! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
scotty Posted July 1, 2016 Report Share Posted July 1, 2016 23 minutes ago, Fatty said: Sadly not, it's nearly £175.00 for me and Edds! .....and that's just for starters. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Bubba C Posted July 1, 2016 Author Report Share Posted July 1, 2016 23 minutes ago, Fatty said: Sadly not, it's nearly £175.00 for me and Edds! How much would it cost one of the regulars to receive a blowie from just the one of you? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Bill Stickers Posted July 1, 2016 Report Share Posted July 1, 2016 I had an overweight driving instructor for one lesson. I sacked him off because he made me drive him to his favourite burger van near Slough. My lesson started in Oxford. Fat unprofessional cunt. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest BrothersQuim Posted July 1, 2016 Report Share Posted July 1, 2016 7 minutes ago, Bill Stickers said: I had an overweight driving instructor for one lesson. I sacked him off because he made me drive him to his favourite burger van near Slough. My lesson started in Oxford. Fat unprofessional cunt. I always thought Fatty worked in an office, you live and learn I suppose. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Bubba C Posted July 1, 2016 Author Report Share Posted July 1, 2016 11 minutes ago, Bill Stickers said: I had an overweight driving instructor for one lesson. I sacked him off because he made me drive him to his favourite burger van near Slough. My lesson started in Oxford. Fat unprofessional cunt. You misspelt 'sucked', Bill. 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest DingTheRioja Posted July 1, 2016 Report Share Posted July 1, 2016 2 hours ago, BrothersQuim said: On topic though, the worst burger van I have ever seen was one that parked literally outside of an abattoir. I honestly don't know how the cunts could sit there and tuck in with that smell emanating from the building behind them, the death crys of the cows and sheep & sudden bang as the bolt gun went to work. Whinge arse, just think of the saving on food miles! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cuntybaws Posted July 1, 2016 Report Share Posted July 1, 2016 2 hours ago, BrothersQuim said: On topic though, the worst burger van I have ever seen was one that parked literally outside of an abattoir. I honestly don't know how the cunts could sit there and tuck in with that smell emanating from the building behind them, the death crys of the cows and sheep & sudden bang as the bolt gun went to work. At least you knew the food was fresh. As a man used to haggis I never worried too much about what was in burgers until I saw a sign on a van that read, "All our burgers are guaranteed 100% testicle free". The fucking cunts, I thought, trying to use cheap, tasteless breadcrumbs in place of good quality bollocks. John Selwyn Gummer is a cunt. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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