Neil Posted January 29, 2016 Report Share Posted January 29, 2016 It's Friday night for fucks sake! Here I am in my hotel room at 9.00 and ding fucking dong,shut the fuck up for gods sake,it's a fucking archaic ritual that means fuck all to me, all you are doing is ruining my friday night on the piss.ì can't believe the scousers havn't nicked the fucking things and melted them down for scrap. God you are a noisy cunt Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest MikeD Posted January 29, 2016 Report Share Posted January 29, 2016 Fucking church anything, fucking medieval shite for cunts. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cuntybaws Posted January 29, 2016 Report Share Posted January 29, 2016 I read "The Nine Tailors" once. Once was more than enough. Lord Peter Wimsey was a cunt. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Manky Posted January 30, 2016 Report Share Posted January 30, 2016 I was in Munich at Christmas in about 1984 and retired to my hotel room about 11pm on Christmas Eve after a healthy session on the old Bavarian fighting juice. Just before midnight, it sounded as if all the bells in the world were going off at once. Every church in the city, and there are fucking millions of the cunts, seemed to be trying to be the loudest. Sleep, even when totally shitfaced was impossible. As I had left by earplugs at home, naturally I had to return to the fray until all them gay fucker campanologists had got bored and fucked off home. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest DingTheRioja Posted January 30, 2016 Report Share Posted January 30, 2016 Mrs D and I enjoyed our stay in Liverpool last year.... ...the only thing that ruined it was walking along the Mersey and seeing that new shitty conference venue they've got... there was an NHS conference going on and I'm sure I recognised some cunts from 15 years ago.... Mind you, I just smirked at them like a cunt and thought, ha, you're stuck in there on this lovely sunny day and I'm off to the pub for lunch.... a long lunch... Just now, Manky said: I was in Munich at Christmas in about 1984 and retired to my hotel room about 11pm on Christmas Eve after a healthy session on the old Bavarian fighting juice. Just before midnight, it sounded as if all the bells in the world were going off at once. Every church in the city, and there are fucking millions of the cunts, seemed to be trying to be the loudest. Sleep, even when totally shitfaced was impossible. As I had left by earplugs at home, naturally I had to return to the fray until all them gay fucker campanologists had got bored and fucked off home. Try Italy.. those cunts know how to make annoying bells that are seriously out of fucking tune.... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Manky Posted January 30, 2016 Report Share Posted January 30, 2016 3 minutes ago, DingTheDoggie!! said: Try Italy.. those cunts know how to make annoying bells that are seriously out of fucking tune.... Italy gave us Pavarotti and Germany gave us The Birdie Song. I bet Spic bells are more musical than Kraut ones. The ones I heard sounded like Robert Louis Stevensons 12 foot steam powered tin dildo going ten to the dozen up Steve Jobs arse using broken Budweiser bottles as lube. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest DingTheRioja Posted January 30, 2016 Report Share Posted January 30, 2016 22 minutes ago, Manky said: Italy gave us Pavarotti and Germany gave us The Birdie Song. I bet Spic bells are more musical than Kraut ones. The ones I heard sounded like Robert Louis Stevensons 12 foot steam powered tin dildo going ten to the dozen up Steve Jobs arse using broken Budweiser bottles as lube. Oh we can but hope... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
scotty Posted January 30, 2016 Report Share Posted January 30, 2016 46 minutes ago, Manky said: I was in Munich at Christmas in about 1984 and retired to my hotel room about 11pm on Christmas Eve after a healthy session on the old Bavarian fighting juice. Just before midnight, it sounded as if all the bells in the world were going off at once. Every church in the city, and there are fucking millions of the cunts, seemed to be trying to be the loudest. Sleep, even when totally shitfaced was impossible. As I had left by earplugs at home, naturally I had to return to the fray until all them gay fucker campanologists had got bored and fucked off home. I knew an electrician who was also a campanologist. He was a fucking weirdo, but in an odd sort of way he was an alright bloke. He once got me to notate the keys of a list of songs he wanted his group of bellringers to perform. I went to the concert and it sounded surprisingly good. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Manky Posted January 30, 2016 Report Share Posted January 30, 2016 8 minutes ago, scotty said: I knew an electrician who was also a campanologist. He was a fucking weirdo, but in an odd sort of way he was an alright bloke. He once got me to notate the keys of a list of songs he wanted his group of bellringers to perform. I went to the concert and it sounded surprisingly good. Puff Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest DingTheRioja Posted January 30, 2016 Report Share Posted January 30, 2016 14 minutes ago, Manky said: 23 minutes ago, scotty said: I knew an electrician who was also a campanologist. He was a fucking weirdo, but in an odd sort of way he was an alright bloke. He once got me to notate the keys of a list of songs he wanted his group of bellringers to perform. I went to the concert and it sounded surprisingly good. Puff I think "bellend" would have been more appropriate... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Witheredscrote Posted January 30, 2016 Report Share Posted January 30, 2016 36 minutes ago, scotty said: I went to the concert and it sounded surprisingly good. You were probably pissed Scotty , thought of that. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
scotty Posted January 30, 2016 Report Share Posted January 30, 2016 1 hour ago, witheredscrote said: You were probably pissed Scotty , thought of that. I'm always pissed, scrotes. Morning to night. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
colonelkurtz Posted January 30, 2016 Report Share Posted January 30, 2016 3 hours ago, scotty said: I knew an electrician who was also a campanologist. He was a fucking weirdo, but in an odd sort of way he was an alright bloke. He once got me to notate the keys of a list of songs he wanted his group of bellringers to perform. I went to the concert and it sounded surprisingly good. A uni mate was a campanologist and he lived on heinz sandwich spread sarnies and monster munch and was welsh .. but he wasn't at all weird .. honest Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest nobgobbler Posted January 30, 2016 Report Share Posted January 30, 2016 I live next door to a church and the cunts are always on the scrounge for an amplifier or a mic stand or some other shit for their sunday night singalong. Fuck off you god bothering karaoke cunts and get your own, you've got more money than I have. Don't bother knocking on my door, I can sit here hiding behind the sofa all night. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Alfie Noakes Posted January 30, 2016 Report Share Posted January 30, 2016 You could have the "call to prayer" belting out from a huge PA system around your local mosque competing with the bells. God bothering cunts! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest DingTheRioja Posted January 30, 2016 Report Share Posted January 30, 2016 16 minutes ago, Alfie Noakes said: You could have the "call to prayer" belting out from a huge PA system around your local mosque competing with the bells. God bothering cunts! Nah, Living on a Prayer... that'll annoy the fuckers... ... Bat out of Hell for the Jehovahs... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest MikeD Posted January 30, 2016 Report Share Posted January 30, 2016 44 minutes ago, DingTheDoggie!! said: Nah, Living on a Prayer... that'll annoy the fuckers... ... Bat out of Hell for the Jehovahs... Or how about 'Shut the fuck up or i'll burn the fucking place down'. I know that's not a song....... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest DingTheRioja Posted January 30, 2016 Report Share Posted January 30, 2016 20 minutes ago, MikeD said: Or how about 'Shut the fuck up or i'll burn the fucking place down'. I know that's not a song....... I'm too sexy for my shirt.... Chinese torture for the ears... bound to make the cunts fookoff... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Alfie Noakes Posted January 30, 2016 Report Share Posted January 30, 2016 2 hours ago, MikeD said: Or how about 'Shut the fuck up or i'll burn the fucking place down'. I know that's not a song....... Yes it is now, I have just written it. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest nobgobbler Posted January 30, 2016 Report Share Posted January 30, 2016 "Hell Raiser" Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest DingTheRioja Posted January 30, 2016 Report Share Posted January 30, 2016 Derek & Clive - This Bloke Came Up To Me (You cunt) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
scotty Posted January 30, 2016 Report Share Posted January 30, 2016 7 hours ago, colonelkurtz said: A uni mate was a campanologist and he lived on heinz sandwich spread sarnies and monster munch and was welsh .. but he wasn't at all weird .. honest I think we might be talking about the same bloke. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
cuntspotter Posted January 31, 2016 Report Share Posted January 31, 2016 18 hours ago, colonelkurtz said: A uni mate was a campanologist and he lived on heinz sandwich spread sarnies and monster munch and was welsh .. but he wasn't at all weird .. honest Fuck...... I'll bet I know 'im. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Witheredscrote Posted January 31, 2016 Report Share Posted January 31, 2016 3 hours ago, cuntspotter said: Fuck...... I'll bet I know 'im. Know him , I bet you are related to him Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest DingTheRioja Posted January 31, 2016 Report Share Posted January 31, 2016 3 hours ago, cuntspotter said: Fuck...... I'll bet I know 'im. 40 minutes ago, witheredscrote said: Know him , I bet you are related to him You are him, and I claim my £20........ Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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