Guest Bill Stickers Posted May 6, 2015 Report Share Posted May 6, 2015 You know the kind of tedious cunts I'm talking about:"This is my new car. He's called "Barry". God I'm such a fucking hoot aren't I!" Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest DingTheRioja Posted May 6, 2015 Report Share Posted May 6, 2015 Have you met Punkers and his Range Rover Confuscious? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
White Cunt Posted May 6, 2015 Report Share Posted May 6, 2015 Meet David Hockey with CeilidhDavid Hockey on the road with love doll Ceilidh in 2009 on the Ceilidh Trail, Cape Breton Island, Nova Scotia, Canada. Photo: Orange NewsA Canadian man has left his wife at home to travel the world with six sex dolls for company.Dave Hockey, 57, insists his wife "doesn't mind" about his $25,470 bizarre trip of a lifetime, reported The Sun.So far, he has traveled with his fake girlfriends across the UK and North America, taking in Stonehenge, the Grand Canyon and Niagara Falls.The dad-of-two said, "My wife understands it is a hobby. She isn't threatened by the dolls, and she knows I'm not going to run off with a piece of silicone shaped like a woman."He filmed a seven-week road trip across America, from his home in Nova Scotia to San Diego, meeting other doll owners for his own documentary.And during the holiday, Bianca, a $3,200 silicone doll, was taken sky-diving, horseback riding and for on the back of a Harley Davidson. Hockey has even bought glamorous outfits for the dolls, 18 wigs, plus several pairs of stilettos.He added, "I purchased my first dolls in November 2006. They looked cute. I think the dolls are pretty - any man is lying if he says they aren't."His collection includes life-size dolls Jessica, Gabrielle, Jocelyn, Lilly, Ruby, Jenny, and Bianca, and the slightly smaller "Teddy Babes" Carley, Samantha, Diana, Miyuki, Jessica, Janelle and Nita. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest nobgobbler Posted May 6, 2015 Report Share Posted May 6, 2015 Is that a fanny size hole where her ear should be? Weird cunt. Both of them. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jiggerycock Posted May 6, 2015 Report Share Posted May 6, 2015 Inanimate objects?Cunt plying his trade in Totenham Hotspurs' risible central defence at present.His parents called him Federico Fazio, although I think it was a legal requirement in Spain rather than any attempt at wit on his parents part. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest nobgobbler Posted May 6, 2015 Report Share Posted May 6, 2015 Yeah, and out of all the names to choose from, they go and call it a Stanley knife. Why not call it a Steve knife or Dave knife. And why not Paddy up the car when changing a wheel? I'm prepared to make a stand, from now on my Fanny will be called . . . Keith. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cuntybaws Posted May 6, 2015 Report Share Posted May 6, 2015 David Hockey on the road with love doll Ceilidh in 2009 His collection includes life-size dolls Jessica, Gabrielle, Jocelyn, Lilly, Ruby, Jenny, and Bianca, and the slightly smaller "Teddy Babes" Carley, Samantha, Diana, Miyuki, Jessica, Janelle and Nita.Noel Edmonds has one of those, called Candice. (He fucking does too, you sceptical cunts, look it up if you don't believe me! I'd post a picture but for some reason the site won't let me insert links at present.)Anyway, drifting back topic-wards, Mrs Baws does an excellent impression of an inanimate object during what is laughably described as our lovemaking, but she comes alive fast enough if I "accidentally" call her by her sister's name! 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
scotty Posted May 6, 2015 Report Share Posted May 6, 2015 Noel Edmonds has one of those, called Candice. (He fucking does too, you sceptical cunts, look it up if you don't believe me! I'd post a picture but for some reason the site won't let me insert links at present.)Anyway, drifting back topic-wards, Mrs Baws does an excellent impression of an inanimate object during what is laughably described as our lovemaking, but she comes alive fast enough if I "accidentally" call her by her sister's name! I rolled off the wife. "For fuck sake, it's like shagging a blow up doll," I huffed.She just stared at me speechless, wide eyed and open mouthed."You're not helping yourself here" I added. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
White Cunt Posted May 6, 2015 Report Share Posted May 6, 2015 At Properkhunt hovel, Bertie The Baseball Bat keeps order and discipline among the residents. Charming. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
White Cunt Posted May 6, 2015 Report Share Posted May 6, 2015 (edited) At my secondary school, the history teacher used to carry a piece of hosepipe to hit us with. He called it Marlene. It didn't help that the cunt was a six foot six ex copper. Edited May 6, 2015 by White Cunt 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest DingTheRioja Posted May 6, 2015 Report Share Posted May 6, 2015 Meet David Hockey with CeilidhIf these dolls are supposed to be perfect versions of women, why are her tits odd sizes and off-centre? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Lady Penelope Posted May 7, 2015 Report Share Posted May 7, 2015 Ethel my freezer has got a cold heart. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Hokey Gingers Posted May 7, 2015 Report Share Posted May 7, 2015 I knew a girl who called her dildo shaped fanny thruster her " African Prince ". You`d have thought those marketing bods would have came up with a catchy name for a fanny thruster by now. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Rev Posted May 7, 2015 Report Share Posted May 7, 2015 I actually fucking agree with this nom in principle. So does my guitar, Colin. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest nobgobbler Posted May 12, 2015 Report Share Posted May 12, 2015 I actually fucking agree with this nom in principle. So does my guitar, Colin. As does my cooker, Marlene De Deitrich. Oh well, I must go for a Jimmy riddle and a Tom tit. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Fatty Posted May 14, 2015 Report Share Posted May 14, 2015 You know the kind of tedious cunts I'm talking about:"This is my new car. He's called "Barry". God I'm such a fucking hoot aren't I!"My lap top Deidre says fuck off thickers. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Lady Penelope Posted June 7, 2018 Report Share Posted June 7, 2018 On 5/14/2015 at 1:57 PM, Fatty said: My lap top Deidre says fuck off thickers. . Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Recommended Posts
Join the conversation
You can post now and register later. If you have an account, sign in now to post with your account.